I read an article in Psychology Today about more evolved ways to convince people to see things your way. It said that when we’re young, people usually convince through unabashed flattery, but this trick usually doesn’t work on those in their 30’s and older because they’re smart enough to see through it. The article had tips on “sneaky” ways to persuade people that aren’t so obvious.
That article inspired me to put the magazine right back on the rack and not buy it. (It also reminded me why I quit reading magazines in the first place – because they’re full of crap!) I couldn’t believe that a magazine touting itself for being up on the latest advancements in the mental health field missed it so badly on this issue. Why? Here again, we have another case where The Bible had the right answer centuries before modern science came up with the wrong one. And it’s such a simple answer that it’s pathetic.
You act like a civilized human being.
That’s it. Use wisdom and discernment in all your dealings, and it’s all a whole lot easier. You don’t have to wonder how to “get through.” You don’t have to wonder what will sweeten them up to you. If you have enough humility to realize that people aren’t going to always agree with you and enough wisdom to respect that, then you find working with others a lot easier. They may even be willing to help you out in other ways, even if they can’t or won’t deliver exactly what you want. And even if you lose, you usually find ways to work things out through that ugly word called compromise. You have to respect others as unique human beings with thoughts and feelings as valid as your own.
It amazes me, because people are usually looking for the easy way out of things, and yet on this they choose to struggle needlessly because of pride. I don’t know why it’s so hard for people to act like they give a crap. I don’t understand how playing games is easier to some than being genuine and building good, honest relationships based on mutual trust. I don’t know why it’s a stretch to try to care about what matters to others. One recent experience that drove this home was how people treated me and Rick when Ollie died a few weeks ago. People were very kind and compassionate – for 10 days. Yep, in a little over a week, people went right back to being themselves and pulling the same old stunts. Sad, but not shocking. A lot of things could be so much better if that were the norm instead of the mask.
I’m aware that none of us are perfect. I have enough of my own rough edges to remember that. But what most people don’t realize is that when it comes to using wisdom and discernment, you do get an ‘A’ for effort. Even if you miss the mark, people grant more grace for misjudging in an effort to do right than they will for the knife in the back. It’s one of the few areas in life where trying matters, and people can tell if you’re really trying, or just slathering on the margarine for what you want out of them next.
It seems to me that the Book of Proverbs has it right on this one. And I chose The Bible over Psychology Today every time. Sorry, science. I like you, but you lose this round.
That’s all today. Take care, and have a good week.
Bye!
That article inspired me to put the magazine right back on the rack and not buy it. (It also reminded me why I quit reading magazines in the first place – because they’re full of crap!) I couldn’t believe that a magazine touting itself for being up on the latest advancements in the mental health field missed it so badly on this issue. Why? Here again, we have another case where The Bible had the right answer centuries before modern science came up with the wrong one. And it’s such a simple answer that it’s pathetic.
You act like a civilized human being.
That’s it. Use wisdom and discernment in all your dealings, and it’s all a whole lot easier. You don’t have to wonder how to “get through.” You don’t have to wonder what will sweeten them up to you. If you have enough humility to realize that people aren’t going to always agree with you and enough wisdom to respect that, then you find working with others a lot easier. They may even be willing to help you out in other ways, even if they can’t or won’t deliver exactly what you want. And even if you lose, you usually find ways to work things out through that ugly word called compromise. You have to respect others as unique human beings with thoughts and feelings as valid as your own.
It amazes me, because people are usually looking for the easy way out of things, and yet on this they choose to struggle needlessly because of pride. I don’t know why it’s so hard for people to act like they give a crap. I don’t understand how playing games is easier to some than being genuine and building good, honest relationships based on mutual trust. I don’t know why it’s a stretch to try to care about what matters to others. One recent experience that drove this home was how people treated me and Rick when Ollie died a few weeks ago. People were very kind and compassionate – for 10 days. Yep, in a little over a week, people went right back to being themselves and pulling the same old stunts. Sad, but not shocking. A lot of things could be so much better if that were the norm instead of the mask.
I’m aware that none of us are perfect. I have enough of my own rough edges to remember that. But what most people don’t realize is that when it comes to using wisdom and discernment, you do get an ‘A’ for effort. Even if you miss the mark, people grant more grace for misjudging in an effort to do right than they will for the knife in the back. It’s one of the few areas in life where trying matters, and people can tell if you’re really trying, or just slathering on the margarine for what you want out of them next.
It seems to me that the Book of Proverbs has it right on this one. And I chose The Bible over Psychology Today every time. Sorry, science. I like you, but you lose this round.
That’s all today. Take care, and have a good week.
Bye!
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