If you know me, then you know it's not unusual for me to have 2 or 3 writing projects going at once. However, with a trilogy in progress, it's time for me to organize and make a plan to keep things going. Here's what's up with my writing these days:

Shatterpoint, the blog series I did here in July, is now published as a free ebook at Smashwords. I published it yesterday and encourage you to go pick up your free copy. If you've never registered with Smashwords, it's easy and well worth it. Plus, you can get ebooks in any and every format available on the market today. So go pick up your copy today and forget everything you know about Christians! It's available at 
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/472472 

Obsidian, the sequel to Move, is temporarily shelved. I feel I've rushed this project, and I need to slow down to make it the best ebook it can be. I'm putting it on hold while I write the rough draft of Fracture, the first book in The Earthside Trilogy. At the rate that Fracture is going, I believe I'll have that rough draft done by Halloween, so I should return to Obsidian in November. I plan to self publish it, so hopefully I'll have proofreads and cover art for it and be ready to publish by late November or early December - if, as an old friend of mine says, the Lord wills and creeks don't rise. Honestly, I don't think shelving this project for now will delay the publication much more than a month or so from my original plan. 

As I just mentioned, Fracture, the first book in The Earthside  Trilogy, is in progress. I have a plan for the entire book and it's flowing ok - usually, I pick up around the midpoint, so this one should go pretty quick. Once I get Obsidian complete and published, I plan to take the rest of 2014 off and return to do the rough draft of Book 2 and Book 3 in this series. I decided to write the entire series at once instead of doing the books one at a time. I feel it would be better to do it all together and to focus on this project solely in 2015, at least until it's ready for submittal to the publisher. This is my biggest venture to date - it will probably be around 200,000 words total for all 3 books, so I need to buckle down and really focus on it. Plus, sci-fi is more intensive than mystery, so it takes a sharper focus and lots more research to pull it off. But it's fun. I enjoy it. I'm already enjoying Fracture, so this whole series promises to be fun. 

So that's the plan. Let's hope it works out. Then again, I can adapt and adjust if I need to. That's what being a writer is all about!

That's all today. Take care and have a great week. 

Bye!

One final stereotype I’d like to shatter is that Christians don’t like anybody that isn’t a believer. That’s not true. In fact, we’re called to go into the world and mingle with all people. If you want to join the faith, great! If not, well, we’re still existing together in this world and trying to make the best of it as we know how.

Christ’s command to love one another means that we respect people, whether they agree with us or not. It means being a decent human being and being polite and courteous to others. It means demonstrating the grace we have received to everybody we meet, and realizing that they have just as much a right to be who they are as we have to be who we are.

In other words, don’t be a jerk. You gain nothing by that. Treat others with the same respect that you want to be treated with, no matter what. It might be reciprocated. It probably won’t in some cases, but living by faith isn’t about what you receive. It’s about doing what’s right because it is right and you want to shine the light of good on the world, and that’s reason enough. Walking the walk is the most powerful testimony you have. Remember, people are influenced by the actions they see; not the words they hear. Everybody’s talking. Not everybody is doing. You can’t expect people to embrace joy if you’re griping and complaining all the time.

Where there’s life, there’s hope, and where hope is, grace abounds. The end times haven’t come yet, so there’s still an unlimited amount of grace to go around in this old world. There’s grace for you. There’s grace for me. There’s grace for everybody! Let’s live in the joy of that grace.

See, Christians aren’t the stuffy, tight lipped, Bible-toting, hard nosed, closed minded morons that you expected. We live in this world one day at a time, just like you do. We even have a unique personality and quirks just like everybody else. We’re still human beings, and we certainly aren’t better than anybody else. All that really makes us different from the rest of the world is where we lay our foundation. Everybody is rooted in something, and our foundation is Christ. What’s yours?

I hope you’ve enjoyed this wild ride through inspiration from somebody that by all rights, should have probably kept it to herself. What can I say? I’m a writer. I guess the extrovert in me won out this time. Now I shall retreat back to the introvert and work on my next novel. Stay tuned. It’s a humdinger.

Grace, peace, and joy to you, now and every day! I’ll see you on social media, my blog, and in my next publication.

Cheers! 

The number one reason I hear people give for avoiding the faith is usually a question: how can a good and loving God allow so many bad things to happen in the world? They know there’s no answer to that question, and I suspect it’s used to trap Christians into trying to explain the unexplainable.

I could tell you that there’s plenty of beauty in the world too. I could tell you that all the evil you see is the result of the devil’s work in this world, and because of God’s grace to let us have free will, we bring it on ourselves with our sinful nature. I could tell you that there’s a perfect Kingdom waiting for us beyond this life, and our joy will be complete when we navigate the mines and pitfalls of this world. I could tell you it’s a test of character, a test of faith, or a test of will. I could tell you that it’s to strengthen you for blessings to come. There’s a grain of truth in all of these things, but you’d still call crap on me because it’s not really an answer. So let me smash this stereotype right now: Christians don’t get it, either, and the truth is that we’re just as puzzled about it as you are.

Several years ago, I went to a funeral for a friend’s mother and the hymn of choice was “When Peace Flows Like a River.” People were swaying and waving their hands, saying “oh yes, Lord, it is well with my soul!” and I thought you people are full of crap. Just minutes before, my friend greeted me with tears in her eyes and told me how devastated she was over this sudden loss. Death, I thought, is not well with my soul, and I’m not ok with it. In fact, I’ve never once met a person who really and truly had a “whatever you want is alright with me, Lord” mentality. For all the faith I’ve seen, I’ve heard plenty of whining and tears and “why?” Nobody’s that well adjusted that just anything is alright and they’ll roll along as if it’s no more than picking apples at the grocery store. I’m sure that song has the best of intentions on how we should be, but nobody’s well with anything that happens. At least I’m bold enough to admit it. I have plenty of problems with plenty of things in this world, and I’m not afraid to admit it: to God, to myself, and to others. I don’t know why people of faith believe they have to hide their pain behind false piety.

I’m a Christian just like the others, but I can tell you that the pain of the world has no answer that will satisfy the soul. Some things just don’t make sense, and there’s no way to wrap our heads around it. Anybody that tells you they have the answer to this riddle is lying.

Ollie’s Story

 On June 24, 2010, Rick brought home a precious green and yellow parakeet from the school he works at. The vice-principal found the little fellow in the outside courtyard, completely exhausted, hungry, and confused. None of Rick’s co-workers knew what to do with the little fellow, and nobody was stepping up to claim the loss. Rick felt sorry for the bird sitting alone in the school all night and weekend, so he brought him home, believing that we and our two parrots, Zack and Chloe, would be good for him.

Before too long, that parakeet was our third bird. We named him Oliver, and he eventually opened up and became a great companion bird. Plus, he sang beautifully. I’d never heard anything like it! We took him to the vet for a “well check,” and the vet told us that he was less than six months old, and the singing was probably from being in close contact with a canary during his early days.

Ollie was great. He got along with our parrots well and was an outstanding companion. Family and friends adored him and loved hearing his songs and watching him bounce around his cage. The only issue was that he seemed to be camera shy. I only have a couple of videos of those beautiful songs, and a handful of pictures. More often than not, I’d get a picture of the wall because Ollie would jump away just as I took his picture.

In October 2013, I noticed that Ollie seemed to be gimpy on his left leg. Zack had just recovered from an upper respiratory infection, and I wondered if Ollie had fallen and banged his foot one day when I wasn’t around. Zack and Chloe had both done this, and were usually fine anywhere from a few minutes to a day later. A couple of days later, I was alarmed when I noticed that Ollie stumbled and was trying to avoid use of that leg altogether. I called the vet. Our regular vet wasn’t available, but another one in the practice took a look at him. He diagnosed Ollie with a kidney infection and said the infection had caused nerve inflammation that was affecting that leg. He gave Ollie a shot and some antibiotics and told me that the infection would clear up in a couple of weeks, but the nerve inflammation could take as much as six months to heal.

Ollie seemed to improve, but after Thanksgiving, I noticed that he was having trouble perching. Now his right leg seemed to be bothering him. I took him back to the vet. I asked for our regular vet, but he was tied up in emergency surgery. Another vet with the practice came in and said she thought the inflammation had spread, and maybe the infection didn’t clear up completely. She gave Ollie another anti-inflammatory shot and more antibiotics. The vet that saw Ollie the first time came in briefly and agreed with this assessment. They asked that Ollie come in two weeks later for a follow up. Ollie had perked up some by the follow up, but still had trouble moving. At this time, I had put him in a smaller cage and set it up with a large “corner perch” and other flat areas instead of perches so he could get around better.  Rick took Ollie to the vet that time, and his regular vet came in for that visit. He said that a tumor was a possibility, but he doubted it because that’s more common in older birds, and Ollie was only three and a half. He said he could do an X-Ray to know for sure. Rick and I talked about it and decided against it. Ollie was stressed out from all the vet visits, and Rick had just been through a two month ordeal with a tooth infection and root canal that had to be redone. Christmas was upon us, and frankly I was overwhelmed – so much that I came down with the flu on New Year’s Eve, even though I had a flu shot. Plus, I just wasn’t sure if I could handle what that X-Ray might reveal. It had been a very stressful time between work issues and Rick’s tooth problems, and frankly I just couldn’t take anymore.

I think you’ve figured out what happened by now. Ollie never recovered and in fact, he continued to deteriorate. On February 27, 2014, Rick and I took him to see his regular vet one more time. The vet found a large tumor on the base of Ollie’s spine. He as absolutely shocked. “He’s so young! I just don’t understand,” I remember the vet saying. And that was the end. There pretty much wasn’t a question. I told Ollie that we loved him and would see him on the other side (I always say this when dealing with death), and he was put to sleep.

I honestly believed he would recover, and it makes no sense to me why an innocent parakeet suffered like that. Ollie never hurt anybody or did anything wrong. We rescued him and intended to give him a long, full life. Why weren’t we allowed the time to do that? I don’t know.  It didn’t make any sense to me on February 27, 2014, and it still doesn’t today. I can’t tell you why Ollie died, especially in such an awful, painful way. But he did, and I’m left with no choice but to accept the loss as one of life unexplainable and move on.

Canyon View

Later that day, after we cleaned up and stored away Ollie’s things, I logged on to my computer to check on a few things for my writing. As my background screen came up, a strange thing occurred to me: it was a picture I had taken at The Grand Canyon exactly one year ago that very day.

I see that picture almost everyday, but it really struck me that evening: both because of the irony of going from a magnificent experience to something that absolutely sucked in 365 days, and because I actually stopped to remember the moment I took that picture. Visiting The Grand Canyon was one of those paradigm-shifting experiences that really caused me to look at things differently. Pictures really don’t do it justice, because it’s incomprehensible unless you experience it – and it is something that you experience with your whole being. I remember  looking at the red rock, blue sky, and sunshine and thinking: This is reality. This is as close as I’ll get to seeing the world like God sees it. That was the world as God created it, before people came along and started carving out our little places in the crevices. That is how the universe really exists. It’s not the 19 inch screen we’re limited to in our day to day living. It’s the unlimited panorama of everything.

The only thing about that view is that my eyes weren’t good enough to see into the valleys and crevices in that rock. I saw the Colorado River as a small, green blip at the bottom of one of those areas, and I only saw it because a sign with a telescope posted showed me where to look, and it was still small. I know that’s a huge river that carved out the very canyon I stood at the top of, but from where I stood at the top, I would have missed it if it weren’t pointed out specifically. And people rafting that river certainly couldn’t see me standing up there, looking down at them. The rock over their head blocked that view.

Human view is limited. Even if we try to step back and see the big picture, there’s no way we can see into all the valleys and pits way down there, and we certainly can’t see the sky well when we’re in one of them. Our vision is one way, and our minds can’t comprehend how it all works together for God’s greater good. I can’t tell you why Ollie died. I can’t tell you why I lost three friends to cancer during an 18 month period of time a few years ago. I can’t tell you why I lost two great aunts to dementia, and now my father-in-law has fallen prey to it. I can’t tell you why people get sick, or why the good suffer just as much or even more than the bad, or why things with apparently good intentions fall flat, or friends betray you, or people aggravate you, or why it just doesn’t work out. There are plenty of things I’ve seen and experienced that to this day, I cannot figure out what good came of it. Maybe I will understand one day, or maybe that reason will never come. All I know is that life isn’t fair, and that Eccleasiastes 9:11 is absolutely right: time and chance happen to us all.

Living with Questions

Being a Christian doesn’t protect you from the dark places; it simply gives you the courage to live with the questions, and the faith to trust that the answers are out there and will work together for good in the end (Romans 8:28). This also isn’t an instantaneous thing, but rather a process that we must work through. It’s perfectly natural to feel anger and grief over our losses and struggles, and there’s no shortcut to dealing with them. We must work through our emotions and take the time we need to come to terms with the questions that plague us.

I don’t believe God is happy when we suffer. Rather, I believe He suffers with us and doesn’t expect us to take it gracefully. Remember that He gave us our emotions so we would know when things aren’t right, and to not feel them means we didn’t obey that all important commandment from Jesus to love. The pain means that you did love, and that is always a right thing to do. These are the times when it’s imperative to have a relationship with the Lord. Believe me, He can take it. He can take your anger, your frustration, your fear, and your sadness. Rant, rave, and rage at him. You can’t hurt Him, but He can heal you if you’re honest with Him and yourself. This is a time when it’s fine to talk and talk and talk –  and then listen for your comfort, in whatever small ways it can be offered. You might be surprised where you find it, too.

I know the outpouring of sympathy when Ollie died touched me as much as his loss. The outpouring of sympathy both from friends in person, online, and even strangers shocked me. It’s usually in tragedy that we bond, and common ground is found in comfort. You may not find the answers, but you could find many other gifts in your suffering that you never expected.

It’s not an answer, but it’s something. Thanks be to God.

Chapter 2 – To Thine Own Self Be True

The concept of surrendering yourself to Christ can be frightening. Certainly, it sounds scary on the surface. What, exactly, does this mean?

I think failure to understand this basic concept is why you see so many “phony” Christians. It’s why you run across so many people that say “Bless You!” and then stab you in the back. It’s why you see hard-sell evangelism knocking on your door, pressuring you to fit into the mold of the “perfect Christian” and saying you aren’t “right” unless you fit the criteria. It’s why there’s so much false piety and so many false prophets watering down the faith and giving Christianity a bad name. And it really pisses me off.

I once read that the account of Daniel in The Bible was toned down drastically from the man’s true personality. It turns out that Daniel was actually a rather bold man that wasn’t afraid to resort to drastic measures to get to his point, but the writer’s of this book toned it down, because they feared that Daniel’s boldness wouldn’t appear pious enough for believers to take seriously. That’s a shame, and if it’s true then Jewish and Christians have been terribly cheated out of knowing the truth about a great figure of our faith. Is it true? I don’t know, but in a way, it makes sense. A person that walked out of a burning furnace and a lions den unharmed and then saw end time prophesey is no meek whimp, and that’s certainly not stuff for the faint of heart. Maybe we wouldn’t have a problem with the lions in God’s kingdom if the accounts of past heroes hasn’t been diluted to death for the sake of piety.

Be that as it may, it is what it is, and we’re left with the question of what surrendering your will really means. Does it mean that we, like these historical accounts, must tone ourselves down and force ourselves into a mold? Absolutely not. If God wanted everybody to be the same, He would have made us clones. Rather, I believe surrender means accepting that you are a unique creation, and finding ways to use what you’ve got for good.

As human beings, we’re far too scared of ourselves. We’re scared of not fitting in and being accepted. Yes, sociology tells us that in order to survive then we must find ways to adapt to groups and live in communities. This is as God intended, but I believe we’ve taken “accepted” way too far. Living in community doesn’t mean fitting into cliques or blindly following a crowd. It means lending your unique knowledge, skills, and abilities to the greater good of all. You do no favors to yourself or anybody else if you sacrifice your authencity to the point of diluting your gifts just for the sake of being liked. That’s ridiculous, and it’s stupid. Yes, I’m getting in your face about this. Different isn’t bad. You just need to learn how you are different (because we all are in some way, whether we like it or not) and how that’s supposed to fit into the big picture.

Surrendering your will means you lay yourself at the Lord’s feet and ask to be molded into His image. And you might be surprised to find that most of the work is already done. He did, after all, make you. Laying down simply means taking stock of what you’ve got, and letting Him show you how to best use it. How do you do this?

Know Your Strengths

One thing I like to tell people is that we’re all some kind of smart and some kind of stupid. Nobody’s good at everything, but everybody’s good at something. What are some of the things you do best, things that people seem to be impressed by? This isn’t the place to play shy. Think about 3-5 things you’re a natural at, things that you do with ease. For example, I’m extremely organized. I mean, organized to the point that if something the opposite of extreme hording were classified as an illness, I’d have it. People usually go between commending me for how neat and organized I am to wailing about how they can’t find anything because they don’t understand how I file and store things. The reason for this, I discovered through meditation and prayer, is because I’m good at seeing patterns. I can find a pattern in anything, even human behavior (I imagine the psychology degree helps). I think the reason I like Game of Thrones so much is because it’s the only thing on television that really surprises me because the author really has a talent for the hidden. I can see how things work and often figure out where they’re going. Sure, I get surprised by the unexpected occasionally. But that’s rare because patterns are patterns, and it’s human nature to stay in them.

We all have one or two things that we’re great at, and it’s a no-brainer to find them. Where the work usually comes in is at the mid-level tasks, the things we’re ok at and could probably get better if we try. This is where most things fall, and this is where some prayer and meditation come into play to figure out which of these we need to build to better talents and which is alright to let go of. This is where it can get confusing, because there’s so much in the world that we can literally become overwhelmed with all the possibilities in front of us.

I once read a suggestion that a good way to take stock is to rate the things you do on a scale of 1-10: 1 means you suck at it, and 10 means you’re awesome. Things on this scale can usually be improved an average of 2 points with dedication and practice, so that gives you a range of reference. If you’re a 5 or above, you can get pretty good at something if you want to dedicate the time and effort to it. Below a 5, and it’s probably not worth your time to worry about. Here are a few examples for me:

Writing is something I’ve always enjoyed. I was drawing in my picture books to expand on the stories before I knew how to read and write. However, love a talent does not make, and throughout school I figure I was a 6 on writing – better than average, but not knocking it out of the park. I never got anything published in my high school literary magazine, and my writing was always received politely but not with overwhelming praise in English classes. When my husband and I got a computer in 2001, I realized that I still had a love for writing, and I wanted to improve on it. I started writing, studying up on writing, and refreshing myself on grammar, spelling, and vocabulary. I did get my first book published in 2004, but still had a way to go before I was at a point where I got published regularly. In 2011, after years of still studying, still working, and advice from people in the industry, I finally got not one but 2 publication offers from epublishers, and it’s been going ever since. I still work on my writing regularly to keep my skill up, but hopefully I’m up to an 8 by now.

Cooking, on the other hand, is another issue. I was probably a 3 on this scale when I first got married, and this is kind because there were some things that even the feral cats refused to eat. In my humble first years of marriage, I tried so hard to become a better cook. I read cookbooks, looked things up on the Internet, and tried recipes on the weekends when I had time to “experiment.” All I got for my efforts was more food the ferals wouldn’t touch and frustration. The problem was that I didn’t really enjoy cooking, and was really caving in to social pressure to become a better cook. See, in the south being a bad cook is akin to losing a limb. Everything is still centered in the kitchen. After a while, I realized that if I cooked well enough to feed myself and my husband, then it was alright. Not everybody is destined to win the prizes at potlucks and publish recipes. I was better off spending my time keeping the house clean and organized (which I’m definitely a 10 at) and working on my writing (8 and building) than worrying about cooking. I have probably gotten up to a 4 on the cooking scale by now. Nobody asks me to contribute to the sick, bereaved, or potlucks, but at least the feral animals do eat it now.

Nobody is supposed to everything, but everybody can do something. Take some time to take stock at what you’re good at and what you’d like to get better at. This is the first step of surrendering will. It’s not so much giving up as it is deciding what to take up, and what to lay aside.

Know Your Weaknesses

By weaknesses, I don’t necessarily mean what you’re bad it (like cooking). This is more about seeing the flip side of your strengths, and where they leave you vulnerable to attack by the devil. The problem with talent is that it can be made a liability, and surrendering your will means knowing where the chinks in your armor are.

I mentioned above that I’m an extremely organized person, because I tend to see patterns in everything. This is good in many practical terms, but it also gives rise to some not-so-pleasant things. Being organized and seeing patterns means I’m a logical person, which isn’t a trait you see often in women. I usually find myself at odds with emotional people, and I get frustrated with people that don’t seem to understand things as quickly as I see them. Simply stated, I have a pride problem. Seeing things in my head as I do, I like to work independently and don’t like for people to question, correct, or boss me around. I’m leery of authority and am quite often on the offensive. It makes me prone to anger, which I know isn’t something I’m supposed to give way to.

We all have issues that we struggle with, and usually they can be tied back to the seven deadly sins: pride, envy, gluttony, lust, anger, greed, and sloth. I identified pride and anger as issues I deal with. Once you know what you’re up against, it’s easier to figure out how to fend off the devil in these areas.

I said above that our strengths can be turned to weakness, and this certainly explains my pride problem. But what about the anger? Well, another way our weaknesses can arise is through seeming “contradictions” in personality. We all have something about ourself that doesn’t seen to quite fit in right, and it can be confusing to deal with. If unresolved, it can cause internal conflict that leads to a weakness.

I’m a borderline introvert/extrovert. Of all the personality traits to be in the middle ground of, this is probably the worst because a person’s inclination in this area is a major determinant of personality. What this means for me is that social situations are unpredictable, because I don’t know which side of the spectrum I’ll be on in any given situation. It also means I have difficulty forming relationships, because people don’t quite know how to take me. I may be extremely talkative when we meet, and then clam up the next time we meet. I’m usually fine once I get out of my shell and get comfortable with people, but unfortunately impressions form fast and most people don’t have time for that – they make a quick judgment and move on. I believe this is a major contributor to my anger issues because I get frustrated with people often over the lack of patience and understanding of this see-saw trait. Sometimes I don’t get myself, and that leads to more frustration! As I recently told Rick, it seems to be a vicious cycle: I come out of my shell and talk to people, they get too comfortable and act like jerks, I wish I never wasted my time, and back into the shell I go. You can see how this becomes a vicious cycle of frustration that can lead to anger issues that arise over and over again.

I only recently came to realize that this could actually be a gift, because I can relate to both introverts and extroverts, and every situation is a new adventure for me. It also makes me a better writer, because I can write from both viewpoints, and the promotional aspect of publication is good for drawing me out at times when I retreated into myself too much, and I need to venture back out into the world. Realizing this is helping me to better understand what leads to my frustrations in getting along with others, and hopefully I’ll continue to make progress in this area. Who knows, I may learn to play well with others all the time yet. Or at least most of the time.

Vice and virtue are often flip sides of the same coin, so it’s important to be mindful of where you’re at and what you’re manifesting to the world. Is it light, or the less swell parts of yourself? Balance is a constant and ongoing issue that we must be attentive to at all times when dealing with our strongest and weakest points.

Interests/Goals

Another part of surrendering yourself is to take stock of your interests and life goals. God puts things into our hearts as ways to manifest our gifts and talents to the world. We’re naturally inclined to people and things that are in alignment with who we are and the purpose we can serve in the world. Unfortunately, the world also has it’s own ideas of how we can serve it best, and this usually isn’t in our best interests – in fact, it can be to our detriment, because it serves others 100% and us none. People talk a lot, and they’re usually better at telling us what’s best for us and what we should be doing than they are at figuring out their own purpose! The problem is that they have no way of knowing what’s in our heart, and they usually don’t care as  long as they get what they want. One thing is for certain: the world isn’t going to look out for you, but God will. That’s why it’s important to guard our heart and our will against outside interference.

I remember that I suffered from discouragement shortly after I turned 30, because I felt stuck in a rut and didn’t know how to get out. It felt like my life had stalled out, and I wasn’t making any progress. After prayer and meditation, I came to the shocking realization that I had been perfectly happy with my life until people started yakking at me about “well, you’re 30 now, so isn’t it time to make things happen? Are you really staying in that same old house/car/job?” I was shocked, because I’m not the type that’s usually influenced by others (in fact, if everybody else is doing it, then that’s usually reason enough for me to stop and think about whether it’s really a good idea, or just being stupid and following the crowd). Furthermore, I was appalled by the fact that people thought I should presume to take God’s place and demand that things happen just because I hit a “certain age.” A look around confirmed that many of these people with their big talk actually wound out in bad situations and circumstances from forcing things in their lives instead of patiently waiting for the right timing, and were scrambling to hold on to them or work things out. To me, it wasn’t worth it. I’m glad I refused to lose my patience and waited too, because sure enough, things started moving in time, and it lasted. I certainly suffered less failure than others who charged ahead because the turning of a calendar page told them to do it. I’m interested to see if this big talk starts again when I turn 40. Keep an eye on my blog. I’ll let you know if it does, and we’ll have some fun with it.

You have to be so careful of what you take into your mind. The only way to know what the Lord has put on your heart is to withdraw into quiet time with Him and discern it through the Holy Spirit speaking through your intuition. As I once heard someone say, just because you can do something doesn’t mean you’re supposed to do it. That’s to true. I remember many years ago when I agreed to do some low-level accounting work because I’m good with math and numbers. I actually did it under the “encouragement” of others who said it would be good at me, but in reality needed one more body in that office counting beans and crunching numbers. I hated it, and unfortunately it was a mistake I spent six years paying for. I still thank God for ending that season of my life, and beseech him to keep that door securely closed, locked, and bolted. Writing and administrative work definitely suit my talents and interests better, and I’m happy doing these things because they’re in my heart.

Surrendering your will is really a sifting process for separating what God put in your heart from worldly expectations. He doesn’t want you to give up anything but what doesn’t fit, and that usually leads to a great deal of relief and joy. In the end, you have everything to gain and nothing to lose.

Common Threads

Surrendering yourself to the Lord really is a process of getting to know yourself and appreciate what makes you unique. It’s about finding your authentic self and exploring ways to bless the world as only you can. The common threads of strength, weakness, interests, and goals make your soul unique, and the process of surrender unlocks your gifts.

Don’t see surrender as a sacrifice, but rather as a process of self-discovery. In doing it, you aren’t just being a disciple of Christ; you’re also being the best “you” possible, and radiating light into the world. And who doesn’t want to shine? 

How are you supposed to develop a personal relationship with the Lord? People tell you this is the number one thing believers need to do, but they never address the elephant in the room of how you relate to a deity. Human relationships are complex enough with the people right in front of you. They take tremendous effort to establish and maintain, and the closer the relationship, the more work it is. And now you’re supposed to make your highest priority relationship with your Maker? To somebody new to this concept, it sounds like being set up for failure. Heck, as a lifelong Christian, it was a challenge to me in adulthood. It took a while for me to wrap my head around the whole thing, and to find a way that worked for me.

People tell you that the key to establishing this relationship is to read The Bible and pray, but they don’t say how this magic is supposed to turn into a relationship. I think it’s because of two things: they oversimplify the concept, and they forget one rather significant aspect to building this relationship that there’s no “how to” instructions on doing. It’s really not rocket science, but it’s not easy either. My hope is to take it step by step to give you guidance on developing your own process on doing what seems to be undoable.

Read the Bible 

This is really the only way to know the Lord, because it’s the only official reference guide that exists. The secret is to find a translation that works for you and to do daily readings. I know there are people that say the King James Version is the only “real” version. That’s hogwash. What good is it if you don’t understand what you’re reading, and what twenty-first century person can really understand that archaic language? I prefer the New Revised Version (NRV). It’s what my church uses, and it’s in plain, modern English, easy to understand. Get a version with footnotes to explain the things that are awkwardly translated, and you have a winner.

As for the time investment, about fifteen minutes a day can get you through the entire Bible in a year. I say “about” because that’s the maximum time investment they’re designed to have for daily readings. I have two Bibles with daily reading plans of this nature, and some daily readings are as little as five minutes (especially in the Psalms). There are many Bible reading plans available, but this is the one that works for me.

Bibles aren’t hard to find. You can read them online, and even sign up for daily readings to deliver to your email box every day. You can download free apps to your phone. And if you’re one of those “I prefer to hold a book in my hand” types, there are countless versions available, from $5 specials at discount stores to fancy large, leather-bound, monogrammed versions that you order at Christian bookstores.

I recently heard on BBN (Bible Broadcasting Network) that The Bible is the most sold and least read book in the world. There’s no excuse for that. With widespread availability, modern translations, and reading plans that can have you through a daily reading while you drink your morning coffee, everybody can find a way to fit it into daily living. It’s not that big of an investment, but it’s one that helps you build the foundation of an eternal relationship.

Prayer 

Certainly you should life up your concerns in prayer, but most people forget that it’s supposed to be a two way communication. How can God speak to you if you’re always talking? Every now and then, you have to quiet yourself and be open to the answers you seek and the insight you need.

God speaks to people in different ways – through thoughts and ideas, insights, music, nature, art, reading, things other people say, or even through mysterious circumstances. It really depends on what speaks to you and how He can reach you. I’ll cover more on uncovering your authentic self in the next chapter.

Many people talk about meditation, and I do believe there’s merit in taking time to withdraw from everything to be quiet and open to inspiration. It’s imperative to me to have at least a few minutes to myself every day; otherwise I get rather cranky because I haven’t had time to “center” and get myself “set” to deal with life and the world. Meditation doesn’t have to take long periods of time and in fact, I grab mine a piece at a time throughout the day: getting dressed in the morning, driving home from work, doing housework, taking a shower, and even taking a few quiet minutes before going to bed. Even five minutes of silence can work wonders for the soul. It can even be helpful to withdraw from the chaos if you find yourself overwhelmed. One frequent practice I’ve always had is to take short breaks for a walk during the workday. I call this my “purge the brain” time, and it’s ten minutes to walk outside and take in what’s happening in the rest of the world: the sky, the trees, the animals rushing around, the sunshine (or clouds), the feel of the air – just reminders that the world is still out there and turning just fine, despite whatever chaos is happening “in there.” God is referred to as “the still, small voice,” so the only way to hear is to turn off the distractions and open yourself to receiving. It’s like a radio: you can’t hear the music unless you turn it on. Well, this is the converse: to hear from God, you have to turn the world off.

Lifting up your requests, cares, and concerns is certainly a wonderful way to connect with God. Just be sure that He has a chance to speak back every now and then. Finding that time could be as easy as putting down the phone or shutting off the television or radio for a few minutes. You’d be amazed at the peace and inspiration you discover from the briefest retreat from the chaos of life.

Intuition – It’s Not New Age Mumbo-Jumbo

Intuition is often misunderstood as some sixth sense or mystical connection with the world, and for that reason it’s often not respected or used correctly. Some people grant it too much power, relying on it as magic. Others shun it as sorcery because Christians aren’t supposed to deal with that stuff. And neither side realizes it for what it really is: the Holy Spirit working in and through us.

The Holy Spirit is probably the most misunderstood of the Holy Trinity, because we just don’t get it. It’s a purely abstract manifestation of the Lord working in us, and for that reason we usually don’t know what to do with it. All we know is that the mind is sacred territory, and we don’t want anything in there controlling us.  Our thoughts are the one thing that only we are privy too, and to find out that something else has access to the most private part of ourselves is uncomfortable.

There’s really no need for this. If you read The Bible, you know that the purpose of the Holy Spirit is to be a “helper” to us. That means it’s a non-intrusive guide that heightens your senses so you can act with wisdom, discretion, and discernment. Think about people you know that often ignore their intuition – what usually happens to them? They don’t use it, so they lose it. Eventually, it never speaks to them at all, and then they’re groping around, dependent on their own senses to navigate a complicated world. It’s like shutting off the GPS in a strange city. Maybe they’ll stumble upon the best thing; most of the time they don’t. It’s potluck. And that’s a heck of a way to live.

If you see intuition as God working in you, then there’s nothing to fear. In fact, it’s a great comfort to know we have a direct line to our Maker that can help us see what’s unseen and guide us on the best path. It’s better than a NOAA Weather Radio – it’s always broadcasting, it always tells you what’s coming up, and when it’s about to get nasty, an alert goes off so you can prepare. Jesus gave us a great gift when He sent the Holy Spirit to help His believers. It’s tremendously valuable once we know and use it correctly.  

On the surface, it can seem like a one sided endeavor. After all, God made you and knows you better than you know yourself, but we do have a choice and sometimes, we unintentionally shut him out. Building a relationship reduces this risk and keeps us open to His will for us, not only in life but in each and every day. One of my daily prayers is for the Holy Spirit to lead and guide me through the day and whatever may come.

Building a personal relationship with the Lord doesn’t make you weird or wacky. In fact, I think it gives you the confidence to be the best you that you can be. It unlocks your personality and allows you the insight to find the best ways to invest yourself, your mind, and your talents in things that will build a better life, both today and in the future.

Think of this as building an antenna or constructing a satellite that will give you better reception. The more you try, the more you hear. Certainly it takes time and effort, just like all relationships, but its well worth it. Be patient, give it your best effort, and you may be surprised to find that talking and listening to the Lord becomes as natural to you as all the other things you do in your daily routine.