But still, they are persistent. Since I get various stories, and unlucky for him, they gave his number to a mystery and sci-fi writer. Dad told people that the dude that was handing out his number at the bars on weekends was dead - clever, and it certainly worked, but it was only fun for a while. And I did Google the name and find an obituary, so I'd be justified in using it. But no, I'm more creative than that. So from now on when you call for Chris Northcutt, I'll say one of these four things:
1. ISIS activated his cell, and he's no longer in the country.
2. The humans he was trying to traffic were actually CIA, and he's in jail.
3. We found his flashpoint imprint in the crop circle out back. The tachions are pretty strong out there, but we haven't finished digging for the rest of him yet; or
4. Sorry, the cartel got him first, and nobody's seen him since.
And in all of these instances, don't even ask about the money, because I was his psychotherapist, and I'm not risking my license for the likes of you.
One problem solved.
Here's another story I keep seeing/hearing/reading in various places. Ladies, if your boyfriend has 2, 7, or 14 other girlfriends, then he is not a boyfriend. He's something else which, in turn, makes you something else if you condone it- both of which are politically incorrect. The same is true for friends that continually betray you or put you down, and you keep hanging around them. Far be it from me to tell you what to do. I would just like to think that having some self respect is important to people, and that you don't want to get slung around. Geeze, forget people, eh? Get a parrot. Consider these important features:
1. Parrots are flock animals who bond with their caregivers.
2. Parrots are loyal.
3. Parrots are observant and empathetic.
4. Parrots are stuck with you. And on you.
Yea, birds are the best!
Speaking of betrayal, here's one from the "I know a guy who knows a guy" files: I do know somebody that stood up to their toxic friend. The friend is really proving that they can be madder and hold a grudge. Good for them! Too bad they forgot that they confided a major family secret to the person they stabbed in the back,and that wound is leaking. Oops!
Now you really want a bird for a best friend, don't you? Except parrots can talk, too. In fact, after I finish writing The Earthside Trilogy, I'm considering a short story where a bird solves the crime simply by telling the detective what they know.