There's a lot of talk lately about birth control and what access women should have to it. I must say that I don't understand what all the fuss is about. It's been my experience that most men are wildly in favor of women using birth control - after all, they don't want to be financially responsible for a Dugger-type household. I think the core issue here isn't about woman having or being on birth control; it's about who pays for it.

I remember the hullabaloo that happened many years ago when it was discovered that the insurance policy that my company has would pay for Viagra but wouldn't pay for birth control. Oh, women said, you'll pay for them to knock us up but won't pay for us to prevent it? They saw the point. Birth control was covered. There was no question about the ethics or morality of using these drugs. It was the simple fact that the coverage of these medications affects the most personal and intimate part of a person's life, and each partner should be offered the same benefits to handle it responsibly.

Of course there are moral issues involved, especially when discussing use of the "morning after" pills that are under the gun. But really, this type of "birth control" has always been debated. Is it really birth control if the purpose is to undo what's done, and not to prevent it? It seems to me that's the real question. Some see it as early stage abortion and don't want their tax dollars to pay for it. Some still see it as birth control and say why not? And when you come right down to it, it's really the same old abortion debate that we've had for decades and we'll never really resolve it. There are just too many elements, opinions and perceptions in the mix.

I think that's what this really comes down to - personal perception. We all have different lifestyles and face different issues due to that. In the end, I think the most important thing is that women are aware of the position of their employers/insurance and offered affordable options. Because I do believe that we should all agree on one fundamental point. Whether you believe in using birth control or not, it does harken back to a core issue of personal responsibility. So come on, folks. If you'll pay for the party (Viagra), then pay for the clean up (birth control). Because women have responsibilities in this modern day and age, and we deserve options too!

What do you do when you realize that something in your life doesn't fit as well as it used to? Do you try harder to keep it, work around it to make it fit, or let it go?

I've found myself in this situation lately. As I completed the edits on Anywhere But Here early this week, I realized that there were many things that need to be done before the book comes out in April to prepare for publicity and promotion opportunities. One thing I learned with Blurry is that it's not wise to wait until the book comes out to start publicity - you need to start building up an audience ahead of time. Promotion, of course, takes time and effort and is necessary if you want your writing to reach the readers you wrote it for. As I was considering what to check and where to direct my promotional efforts, I took a look at my life and realized that I was hanging on to some things that were no longer serving the purpose of improving or building up my writing the way they used to. I've realized for months that I'm no longer as active on Writing.com or on Open Salon as I had been a few years ago. After Blurry was published, I shifted my focus to publicity and promotion for my novels, novellas, and long stories and found I wasn't working on short stories or flash fiction the way I used to. This realization caused me to pause and take stock of where I am and whether what I'm holding on to is serving the purpose of getting me to where I want to be.

So over the past week, I've been asking myself what my true long-term goals are for my writing, and what I need to do to reach them. I realized that I am a novelist at heart, and that in order to succeed, I need to build up an audience of readers and increase my promotional skills. In looking at my online activity, I realized that although I had invested a lot in Writing.com, I wasn't getting a return. In fact, I've lost followers/readers at that site as I've been more focused on maintaining this site and my activity on other social media outlets where I get more feedback and have more connections, like Facebook, Twitter and Goodreads. It was a very hard decision to make because once  upon a time, I loved Writing.com and got some great feedback there that I know made me the writer I am. But I realized that if I want to grow in my writing, then I need to prune what isn't producing fruit. Writing.com isn't producing anymore and I don't have time or energy to invest in something that's withering on the vine. So I made the difficult decision to suspend the blog at that website on Sunday and will not renew my upgraded account when it comes up for renewal later this year. It hurt terribly, but I need to focus my attention on places where I'm interacting with and reaching the most people.

With Open Salon, the decision was easier. I've never been very active on that site, and in fact suspected I made a mistake after a few short months of being there. I just couldn't seem to "fit in" and find the flow at that blogging site. So tonight I made my farewell entry and let that one go as well.

I think such realizations happen to all of us from time to time. We come to realize that something that used to be a part of our life is slipping away, and we have to make an active decision on whether to hold on to it, or let it go. Life is always changing, whether we realize it or not. Sometimes (like me in the past couple of years) you have major changes that rock your world and throw everything in a different balance, but things are still moving even when it seems like you're in a rut and nothing's happening. Slow motion can be very deceptive because it mirrors stagnation, but it's motion even if we don't perceive it.  If the sun rises and sets, then things are moving. People and things slowly pass through our lives and we may not realize it until it hits us one day that something that used to be around all the time isn't such a big part of our lives any more.

I think I got hit with a combination of the fast and slow moving kind this time. I did go through two major life transitions  a couple of years ago and as those were setting, I got my book contracts. These two blogs were there with me along the way, but I didn't realize until recently that their role in my day to day life had slipped as much as it had until I took stock and realized they weren't where I thought I'd left them.

Things do come and go in our lives, and sometimes it can be painful to face that something that meant a lot to you is slipping away. The natural tendency is to hold on to it, even if we know in our heart that it's season has passed in our life. It's especially hard to let go of something that was a benefit or comfort to us. And yet, pruning is the secret to growth. If we really want to continue to grow and be free to accept greater blessing and success, then we must be able to let go of what isn't serving our life anymore. Pruning hurts - no doubt about that - but it leads to better growth. Just as my roses will start growing after I prune them next month, so too will I grow from finding the courage to cut off this dead wood from my life. This summer, I hope to have more than just big, beautiful roses growing in my life.

Yes indeed, it's late winter and pruning season is coming to my part of the world, literally and figuratively. I have faith that it will lead to beautiful blooms in due season.

Hi everybody! I am happy to report that Anywhere But Here is now in pre-production. I'm sure you noticed that the book cover came last week, and I changed the home page of the site to show a teaser for the upcoming release. The editor also sent me edits on the manuscript, which I'm working on now. Wow, I didn't realize it, but it seems a lot got by me on this one. I got tendinitis while I was working on this manuscript and I don't think I edited it as extensively as I should have. In fact, I set it aside and believe I forgot to do a round of edits on it before I submitted it. Oops! I'm lucky they accepted this manuscript, and that they assigned me a patient editor that was willing to help.

I've also managed to snag an author interview and guest blog spot for April, so all is progressing well with this one. I hope to find more publicity opportunities soon. I'm keeping my eyes open!

Unfortunately, it seems that everything has taken off this month. February is typically a busy month, and I'm not sure why. But this time, the month has really taken off! In fact, I had to put my schedule on lock down Thursday when I found I had been signed up for 2 things I didn't volunteer for, and had to cancel them. It's just that crazy. And really, it was completely disrespectful for those people to do that. You don't sign people up for things when they aren't there, and especially when they told you twice not to do it (which was the case in one instance). I don't feel one bit bad about cancelling on them, either. In fact, I feel I was more than gracious to even let them know. I could have done what most people do and just not show up.

Anyway, I will manage as I always do. I hope you are all doing well. Take care and have a good weekend.

Bye!

If you work, you serve others. This is a simple fact of life. The issue is, who are you serving? Customer bases vary widely but there are some things that are universal no matter who you're working with, be it the utility company or a government agency. Here are a few tips to make those calls easier so you get the best (and fastest) customer service possible:

1. Check the website. Everybody has a website now - heck, even my PARROTS have a website, so it stands to reason that companies do too. These websites are updated frequently by experts and usually contain information that customers inquire about most. The purpose of the website is not only to provide services to the public, but to answer some of the most frequently asked questions and to provide guidance on issues that they receive the most calls and e-mails about. Checking the website might save you a call, or at least lead you in a direction where you can fine-tune your inquiries to get more specific information quickly and easily.

2. Plan your call carefully and be mindful of the schedule. If there's a major deadline within the next week, I can assure you that the call volume is high and you will be more likely to be placed on hold or wind out leaving a message that may not be returned for a while. Try to avoid deadline times by planning ahead or, if it can wait, calling a couple of days after the deadline passes. (You can usually find out if you're approaching a deadline time by following Suggestion #1). Another time to avoid are days immediately before or after a major holiday. Staffing is usually low before the holiday (when everybody wants to use those precious vacation days), and call volume is typically extremely high after a holiday (when everybody goes back to work). And Friday afternoons are usually bad too, because everybody wants a Friday off, so if there's leave to burn (in terms of "use it or lose it" days or comp time) that's usually when staff cashes in. The trick is that you want to call when there's maximum staffing, but not extremely high call volume - this increases your chances of getting a human being with correct answers quickly and easily.

3. Read the instructions all the way through. I understand that it's a knee jerk reaction to pick up the telephone once you hit a sentence you don't understand. Don't do it. Keep reading because the answer might be further down the page. I can't count the number of "oh yea, right there it is, I just quit reading" comments I've heard over the years.

4. NEVER pick up the telephone when you're panicked or heightened emotional state unless it's a medical emergency and you're calling 911. I kid you not - I've answered the telephone to full blown hyperventelation many times, and those are awkward calls. I have a psychology degree, but most people in administrative jobs studied areas like business management or accounting and they may not have been trained to "talk you off a cliff." Practice what I call the 10-10-10 rule: Take 10 slow breaths, count to 10 slowly, and wait 10 minutes. Then  you'll be able to frame your question in a way that gets results and answers quickly and calmly.

5. Collect your questions and focus on the person you're talking to as they answer. As you puruse the website and read the instructions, make a list of your questions. Don't interrupt the person in the middle of a sentence with a follow up question before they finish answering the last question, or be one of those  people that says "oh! One last question!" ten times. Because in those situations you usually wind out asking the same thing 3 times because you were so busy formulating new questions that you didn't hear the answer to the one you  were asking.

6. Limit the hypothetical questions. If you say "what if I ..." or "suppose I were to ..."  more than twice, then we suspect that you're looking for ways to duck the red tape (and we will look for ways to trap you into admitting it). Be straightforward and give us the facts, please.

7. Rephrasing the question 7 ways won't change the answer. And "call shopping" (where you realize it's a rotating line and keep calling to work your way through the staff to get the answer you want) is a trick we pick up on around the third call. Everybody in that department has been trained the same way and they'll give you the same answer. No matter how many times you call or how many ways you try to rephrase it.

8. Be respectful. What I mean is that if the person says "I don't know but I can send you to somebody that does know," immediately cease and desist from asking any more questions until you're routed to the right person. Because your "wait a minute, let me ask you this while I have you ..." questions will lead to more "I don't knows" and a delay in getting the information you need while you bark up the wrong tree. Nobody knows everything and despite the current push to "cross train," there are people that know some things better than others. They're trying to help you by sending you to the most knowledgeable person to answer your question. Let them do it.

9. Be patient. Not every question has an immediate answer and they may have to research what you're asking about. So don't wait until the last minute. Plan ahead.

10. Don't lie. I know this sounds silly, but people do call and outright lie about things, only to be embarassed when we use that annoying database at the computer we're sitting behind and catch them in it. That can lead to serious trouble in some situations, so please, no matter how embarassing or hurtful it is to your pride, just tell the truth. We will act with discresion and will do our best to help you - but don't say you mailed the check and it cleared last week when it's lying on the table in front of you. Because they'll look it up, see it didn't arrive, and the next question will be for you to send them a copy of the cancelled check to prove it. Awkward!

A lot of getting good customer service is to use discernment and good, old fashioned common sense in dealing with companies. Be courteous, professional, respectful and plan appropriately and you'll get the fastest and best customer service available. And really, these are good rules to apply to all of your relationships. 

That's all for today. 

Bye! 

I remember a day last summer when the members of our Sunday School class that attended early service came in late. It turns out that a lady passed out as the pastors and choir were processing out at the end of the service.

"She was lying there on the floor and everybody was staring at her," one man said. "I suggested that we call 911 , but everybody ignored me. Then another man walked in, saw her on the floor, said 'gee, someone should call an ambulance' and all of a sudden every cell phone came out." He chuckled. "I'd said that two or three times, but it took ten minutes and a remark from somebody they were willing to listen to before anybody helped the poor woman."

The lady was alright, but that comment made me think. It seems that all of us have either the Power of Knowledge of the Power of Authority. The key to making life easier is finding out which one you're gifted with and rolling with it.

Let me explain. Have you noticed that there are some people that everyone will follow to the end of the earth? Every word they say is gospel truth and nobody questions then (even in circumstances when they're dead wrong and people should know better). Most people call them "natural leaders" but the truth is that they have what I call the "Power of Authority." There's something about them that causes people to listen to and follow them. People with the power of authority seem to excel in positions like business, medicine, mental health, law, teaching and politics because people are drawn to them and to believing that what they say is truth. They may or may not really know their head from a hole in the ground, but there's something about their demeanor that attracts people to listen to them and do what they say. These are the ones that everybody asks for advice from. They lead and others follow, but you don't dare bring them down to the masses.

On the other hand, there are people like me. I get asked for information and directions more than any person I know. In fact, there were two occasions recently where a total stranger blew right past 10 people and came straight to me to ask for directions. The people with me even commented that they passed several others that could have  helped them, but they seemed to target me. It's not just directions either - I get asked all manner of questions all the time. I even put something on my Twitter feed last night saying I had to find out what it was about me that inspired the inquisitiveness in people because I get pounded with questions more than anybody I  know. I definitely have the Power of Knowledge, because people seem to target me as their source of information. Ah, but there is a line I better not cross. For example, if someone asks for directions and I say "here's the most direct route, but I know a better way that will bypass traffic," they'll hold up a hand and say "no, no. That's ok. I just want to know how to get there." (Obviously, it's happened many times.) They make it very clear that I'm not the boss of them. They just want information, thank you very much. They'll process and apply the information I provide the way THEY choose. People with the power of knowledge tend to excel in areas like administration, the arts, entertainment, managing money (accounting), and assistant positions where they're the brains behind the people with the Power of Authority to keep them in check while the world follows them. These are the people with the brains and insight that you want to collaborate with on your teams.

I'm not sure what elusive thing it is that determines whether you have the Power of Authority or the Power of Knowledge, but I do know that it's best to know which you have and to go with it. Because you aren't going to get the other no matter how hard you try. Trust me, I've never won an elected position - hell, I've never even been nominated. But I've slapped away so many invitations to serve on committees and in organizations that I've lost count. See, I'm invited, not elected. And that's a good way to know which you have.

There are other ways too. What happens when people ask you for advice? If they don't do it or if they immediately disregard it and do something completely different, you're a Power of Knowledge person (they were asking to collect information). If they do it, you're a Power of Authority.

Here's another one. What kinds of questions do people ask you? Do they ask you for advice and how to do things? You're a Power of Authority. Do they ask for general information or "do you know" or "have you heard of" type of questions? You're a Power of Knowledge.

And here's the best indicator: How often do people ask you for directions? If never or rarely (and they're so befuddled when you're done that they ask someone else), you're a Power of Authority. If your like me and you become the world's personal GPS the minute you leave your driveway, well, I think you get it.

It amazes me that personality tests seem to miss this critical component of personality, because it is important. It's a good indicator of how your personality meshes with your place in the world.

So, which type are you? Think it over. You might be surprised.

That's all today. More later.

Bye!

I wonder where inspiration comes from. It's a funny thing. For example, I haven't written a single new thing since November, yet I've done a lot with promotion of my work and a great deal of blogging. It's odd. It seems I'll go through these odd spells then all of a sudden I'll get hammered with more ideas than I can possibly keep up with.

Here's another puzzle: I've been agonizing over what to do with our front yard for a year. When you build on your own lot they don't do a thing for your yard - I mean nothing. Rick and I even had to plant grass, which we did, but we did little else because we were getting the inside of the house settled. Well, we finished that about a year and turned out attention outside, but came up blank. Then all of a sudden the entire vision of how to fix the front yard up came to me in Sunday School this morning. Just like that. I actually did a rough diagram of it while we were waiting to take communion on the back of my bulletin in church.

A lot of people have ideas of where it comes from. The most common that I hear is Holy intervention - the Spirit speaks and our mind moves. Some say it's how our experiences affect us. Some say it's where we are in life, or what we're going through - the situations we face and how they shape us. Others say it's more organic and inspiration comes through exercising regularly or eating right. Some say working your mind by doing puzzles. There are so many theories.

I believe they all have merit, but I think it's a more mysterious combination of it all. I sure do wish I could pinpoint what causes those flashes of inspiration that artist live for, though. I suspect I'd be a rich woman if I could find, bottle and sell that secret.

Unfortunately I don't have the answer, so I just have to work through it like everybody else. And hope that today's flash of inspiration for fixing up the yard will be the first of a wave that will inspire me in other areas of life. All I know is that my mind did start moving today, and I hope it's on a train that keeps on rolling.

Take care and I hope you have a great start to the week.

Bye!

Ok everybody, to be fair and not look like a totally arrogant, ungrateful lout I will admit that a total life makeover does not leave one unscathed. I have gained a lot from my recent life transitions, but there are some things that I do miss. I did have a couple of friends at my old job that I still miss talking to on a regular basis. I've met a lot of great people and made new friends, but they were unique and obviously people can't be replaced. I also miss those great places for walking during lunch breaks, shorter (and MUCH less frequent) meetings, and ham subs. Oh man, I haven't found subs as good as that canteen makes them anywhere and believe me, I've looked. I also had a bigger office space at the old place. But then again, they made me keep all those paper files and now that I'm at a place where we digitize everything, I don't NEED as much office space. It's a trade off.

And I think that's exactly the point that helped me transition. For all I miss that was left behind, I see that other things were gained. I lost great walking places and fantastic ham subs, but I found a lower gas bill (from my shorter commute) and vanilla lattes. I miss my covered parking spot, but I don't have to pay for a parking spot any more (hense, more saved money). My job is busier and more complicated, but it keeps me so much more engaged than it used to. It's all about trade offs. Sure I miss the blessings of yesterday, but I'm not blind to the blessings of today. In fact, missing those very things are what taught me to appreciate what I have RIGHT NOW. Because things can change in the blink of an eye. So appreciate what you've got and work with it, because nothing is permanant.

I suppose the whole point harkens back to something I mentioned yesterday. Change isn't good or bad, it's a mechanism that can be used for progress. You just have to know how to use it. Like any resource, it can work for good or ill. It depends on your own effort and intent - on what you want and directing your energy to the right places. You can cling to the past and dig your own rut lamenting what's passed from your life, or you can work with the change and maximize opportunities for progress. The choice is yours.

In closing, I would like to say that in discussing this situation I realized two lessons from this adventure:

1. Don't meddle in the affairs of dragons; and

2. If you dare to meddle in business that's not yours, you better make darn sure you know WHO the dragons are. Because it's awkward to find that what you assumed was a hatchling is breathing more fire than can. Oops.Change can have that uncomfortable side effect.

With that, I deem that it's time to let this situation go. It's been discussed with the appropriate parties and we are on our way to salvaging the situation. So it's time to move on. Because another thing I've learned is that dwelling on wrongs does no good. Vent if you must, strategize, solve and move on. We're in that process and on our way.

That's all. More later. Happy Friday tomorrow.

Bye!

There was an incident today that I feel needs to be addressed once and for all. It's time to clear the air. So here we go.

I had a House committee meeting today on regulations for one of my programs. As some of you know, my job moved from one department to another on July 1, 2010. Moving two registration programs is a massive effort - so massive that we've spent the past year and a half trying to get things settled. We have our last bit of work in the legislature in  hopes of wrapping up this transition for once and for all and getting settled in a nice, peaceful routine.

I was sent to this meeting in order to observe and note what items the committee discussed so we could prepare for anything that needs to be addressed as it continues through the legislative process. Unfortunately, the plan I was sent to execute was disrupted when a former associate of our program (who is also a former colleague that worked closely with this program before my time here) showed up. Even though he is  no longer on payroll or associated with the program or my department in any way, he felt it necessary to use his clout to intervene when the committee was discussing my program's item. The intervention resulted in the natural progression of the conversation to derail into areas that caused the committee members so much confusion that they referred it back to the subcommittee in hopes of getting the questions cleared up. Translation: we took a step back today, which means a delay, which means that my department and the representatives for my program are not happy.

I'm not either, and this mess forces me to attend to an unexpected situation. There are, obviously, some issues with my former colleagues and associates that need to be addressed. And so I have decided to use this blog entry to address them in an open letter to clear the air and set the record straight, for once and for all.

Dear Former Colleagues and Associates:

I understand that transition is tough. Lord knows, I've been through my share. I went to hell and back between my job move and my in-laws moving to town at the same time in the spring/summer of 2010. By the grace of God and the support of some great, stable people in my life (meaning my husband and immediate family), I was able to not only survive two concurrent life changes, but to thrive as well. I openly admit that my old life is dead. There's nothing of it left behind. I actually came to it recently in what I call a "Frodo Baggins Revelation." Just as Frodo realized that his adventure changed him too much to return to his old life, I also realize that I'm not the person I was. You see me out and about and you recognize my physical appearance, but if you talked for me even for a few minutes, you'd realize this isn't the Sherri you knew 18 months ago. Great change has that effect on a person. In fact, I'd say that if it didn't then there's probably something wrong because it should. While the fundamental basics of who you are remain stable, a major life transition (or two) SHOULD shift your paradiam so much that it changes how you see the world and apply those fundamentals to your life. I've moved on and learned so much more than I ever thought possible in a relatively short period of time. It's shocking, but I also see that it was necessary. I needed to change. I needed to grow up more. I needed to lose my fear and to live more boldly than I was in the past so I can fulfill my life purpose now and into the future.

What surprises me is to find that obviously, you are having some problems letting go. To intervene in the affairs of a program that you gave up 18 months ago, knowingly and willingly, is stark evidence that seems to say you still haven't severed your own ties to the past. Honestly, it was the last thing I expected. You played it so cool during and after my move that frankly, I thought you were relieved to be rid of the programs and to move on without them and me. Yet today I (and the full House committee) saw evidence that you are still following our progress and seem to feel some sense of obligation to "look after" us. I can assure you that this isn't necessary. Really it isn't appropriate and I won't lie - there are some folks on my end of this that are furious about what they deem as an unwelcome intervention. Their ways aren't your ways, and the fact that they didn't send an entorage to this meeting didn't speak of negligence - it was strategy for future planning. And you blew up that strategy because you inserted yourself into business that really isn't even yours to look in on because you believe in "making things happen" instead of letting them progress.

Don't get me wrong - I'm not here to cast blame. I understand that it can be hard to let go when something has been your responsibility for a long time. These programs are as old as I am, so it's natural to feel some attachment to something that was under your wing for over 35 years. I also understand that I was very young when you hired me to handle these programs. I was a 23 year old recent college graduate and newleywed in 1999 when you hired me - but that was 13 years ago. I grew up, folks. I don't know if you realized it, but in the years I spent there I did grow, I did learn, and I did outgrow many things. I won't deny that I still have much to learn, and I can be my own kind of fool from time to time. But please, grant me the grace to be the igit I am, not the igit you assume I am because you know the 23 year old me but not the 36 year old me. And believe it or not, there's a great difference between those two people. The girl I was is gone. I'm a new creation now. You may or may not like it. I don't know, and it doesn't matter because I'm gone so it's pointless to ponder.

Likewise, the programs have grown. As I said, the department where we are has a very different way of doing things, but different isn't bad or wrong. In fact, it's been very good for them and they've come a long way in a little time themselves. They're evolving by leaps and bounds but once again, by God's grace we're making it. We're working with great people that work in a very efficient team and have dedicated themselves to learning these programs inside and out. We have daily support. And frankly, it's refreshing for me and for the Board members to be in a place where everybody knows what we do and understand the issues we face, day in and day out. I have met so many good people. I moved to a smaller agency and learned that the world was so much bigger than I ever realized. It's a paradox I know, but an interesting one that I find delight in.

You said when the legislation was drafted to move me that it wasn't personal, it was just business. That's ok. Now please, maintain your professional demeanor. Today was awkward. Let's not do that again. If you wonder how I'm doing or how the programs are doing, please do it right. You know where to find us. Swallow your pride and call or e-mail. Please, let go of the past and entrust us and yourselves to the present. Believe, as we do, that everything happens for a reason. This move went through because the Lord willed it to go through. For whatever reason, He deemed this the time and place for our program to pass from one place to another and change isn't bad. It just provides the tools for moving forward. We do appreciate all that you did for us in the past, but we aren't your responsibility anymore. It's been 18 months and it's time for all of us to move on.

So please, let go. It's not personal OR business anymore. It's just reality. And I know from cold, hard experience that's something that always catches up with you. So make life easy - accept it sooner before it kicks your butt later.

I wish you well in your future endeavors. If we meet again I sincerely hope it will be under better, more friendly circumstances. What I said when I moved still stands: I wish you no ill will as our paths diverged - just respect for what was and the grace to allow us to grow in our respective directions.

Sincerely,

Sherri

I almost wrote this entry months ago when the sex scandal at Penn State broke but for some reason, I held back. In light of today's news that Joe Paterno passed from lung cancer, I'm breaking loose. And here's why:

The media are a bunch of hypocrites. Plan and simple, and this is the truth. The same people that lambasted the man for "not doing enough" months ago are now posting heartwarming articles like the one at http://rivals.yahoo.com/ncaa/football/news?slug=dw-wetzel_joe_paterno_obituary_012212 saying aww - he was a great man with that one bad thing. But now that he died, let's put it aside and remember the great man he was.

Bullcrap. You didn't care to remember his legacy in October. NOW you want to  honor him? Take a look in the mirror, you vultures. The man was dying of cancer and you turned on him like a pack of wolves. Have any of you seen someone struggling with lung cancer? I have. A friend of mine at church lost a year long battle with lung cancer on my birthday in August. It was hell to watch. Absolutely awful. I beg my co-worker that smokes to please stop because I've seen how lung cancer literally eats you alive. It's ugly, painful and brutal. And while Paterno was going through that, the media ripped his reputation and legacy to shreds because "he could have done more."

So is that where we're going now? We're going to charge people for not being their brother's keeper? For not acting when we BELIEVE they should have acted? Ok then, when I was 12 my grandmother died. I was devistated. I turned to many adults to find out how to cope. You know what they said? "It's just a grandparent. This is worse for your mother. Get over it. Others are suffering more."

Ok then, at age 36 I still believe that was a rude and completely inappropriate response to a 12 year old reaching out for help. Say "I don't know" if you're stumped, but don't get your attitude on, especially with a kid. Can I haul those people in and charge them with psychological damage?

Or how about this - when my job was transferred a couple of years ago, it came to light that many things that should have been done weren't. In fact, in some aspects of my job I was improperly trained. Corners were cute and some mistakes of huge proportions were made because the programs were not being given the support they were supposed to have. Can I haul my former colleagues in and charge them with sabatoging these programs and my professional integrity for not handling them properly and for making me look like an igit to my new colleagues? Can I bring them and hold them responsible for me and my current colleagues having to go into a second year of cleaning up things that were messed up, lost or forgotten because of their negligence?

In both of these examples, I believe you'd hear more squawking than an avery with a snake in it.

And on the flip side, I'm not sure I'd even want to go there. I can think of times when I could have done better and didn't. Like Paterno, I can think of times when I just didn't know what to do, so I tried to turn it over to those that I believed had more knowledge and power, only to find that they didn't. I've failed to take responsibility. I've let people down. If everybody I failed hauled me in and held me responsible, I believe every person I ever knew would have a case against me.
 
The point is that we're all human and we make mistakes. We make errors in judgement that have adverse impacts on others. We hurt others with bad decisions. We let other people down by not doing enough or by letting things go when we should act but fear to because we don't know what to do. We fail people by passing off responsibility for things we should act on because we believe others are more competent to handle it. We all fall short. We all fail. If we're going to get into charging people for not doing "good enough," then we're all guilty. So what then? What do you do when every human being on earth is guilty of hurting others? What's the penalty? What's fair? What's right?

I believe that the powers that be in the Paterno case were looking for a big name scapgoat and they found it in Paterno. That was a pretty lame charge to fire him on. He admitted his fault. To tarnish him when he was humble enough to admit what he did wrong makes the accusers more guilty than he was. They played God, and they showed the whole world why they were woefully incompetent in playing the role of the Almighty.

Well, Paterno is with God now. The truth is known and the "big picture" impact of his role in this situation is determined. We on earth can no longer judge him or hold him accountable because he's already answered to the ultimate authority. So now it leaves the rest of us in the awkward situation (of our own making) to determine Paterno's legacy. Will we have the grace to remember him as the great man he was, or will we continue to be hypocrites and judge him guilty for this one error? Whatever happens, it will reflect on those of us left behind throughout the ages.

And as for the rest of it, well, I suppose this forces the media to focus on Sandusky, the real villian in this story, and not a side character.

Hi everybody; I hope you're having a good weekend. My wrist has been hurting a bit from typing a lot at work last week, so this entry will just be a rundown of "what's going on" in my corner of the world.

I got my first newsletter for the Mystery Readers and Working Writer's Newsletter turned in, and that's supposed to be out on the 26th. I'm looking forward to it. I've always wanted to have a regular piece somewhere so this is a dream come true for me. I've also been invited to contribute a story toward an anthology that's being proposed for publication, and I have some fiction story ideas buzzing around in the old grey matter. We'll see what develops. Lots of potential and I'm trying to pull the pieces together to turn some of it into reality.

I finally got back into reading and resumed Inheritance, by Christopher Paolini. I'm about halfway through it and I tell you, it's a great book. I start reading and have to tear myself away to stop! I love it and it's interesting to see how this series ends. Only thing is, I believe it's a bit too violent to be classified as "Young Adult." (I thought the same about Brisinger.) But a good book is a good book. I suspect that this may be the last hardback that I read for a while. I've been reading more e-books lately and now that I have an iPhone I suspect that my e-shelf will continue to expand. Especially since I have the phone with me all the time and it will just be easier to have my library on that device.

I've recovered from my illness a couple of weeks ago and Rick is also recovering. He still has down spells - of course, he got a lot sicker than I did - but we are recovering. That's good news.

The SC Republican Primary is today and we did get out and vote, despite the rain. We believe it's important to vote. It's a privledge of democracy that we intend to use! It'll be interesting to see how it turns out.

That's all for this time. Not much, but that's ok. Sometimes plugging along is just fine and dandy. Today it is for me, at least.

Take care. More later.

Bye!