I started to revive to my old self after Christmas. I guess Mom was right: I needed to get past the holidays to truly recover from the initial shock and sorrow of losing Chloe. Problem is, I found myself "losing it" over other things in other areas of life. Suddenly, everything seemed out of whack. It didn't take me long to realize what the problem was. Things had changed, but I hadn't made appropriate changes in my attitude over them.
It's easy to let things grow out of proportion when you're upset, and to let it have a bigger place in your life than it deserves. That's natural, but it's important to get over the disappointment, accept reality, and to adjust your own attitude to make sure that things remain in the proper balance in life. Truth is, many things had changed, and I got stuck in being angry and aggravated over not being able to control them. Well, that's life. It happens to us all, and the difference is our ability to deal with it. I hadn't done a good job with that.
Thankfully, I've had a couple of weeks off work and enough time after the holidays to really take stock and realize where things got out of whack. I'm also grateful that I'm not prone to depression, and that this self awareness will make me more alert to when grief tries to drag other things out of the closet in my life. Sure, I will have to continue to deal with grief, but at least I know it's boundaries. If discontentment over things other than Chloe rise, I can say "no sir, that's been adjusted. Stay in your lane and let's deal with the right things in the right ways."
Dear reader, as you are my witness, I will. And I'll return to work on Thursday with a clearer mind, peaceful heart, and contentment that all things are either in or getting in the proper balance right now.
Thanks be to God.
That's all today. Take care, and have a great week.