Escape Reality
By SherritheWriter
  • Home
  • Escape Reality (Blog)
  • Science Fiction
  • Mystery/Suspense
  • Short Books
  • Non-Fiction

What I've Learned

8/24/2014

 
There's no doubt that the past year and a half has been tough on us. It seems it's been one challenge after the next. Still, I can't say that the valleys of life are without their merit. You do appreciate the blessings you do find along the way, and there's a lot to learn from them. Here are a few things I've learned from the going getting tough:

1. Take one day at a time. If you focus on your lousy luck or being in a "bad season of life," then it makes things worse. Yes, bad things come and bad days happen, but if you get stuck in a mindset then you'll be defeated far longer than necessary. The best thing you can do is what is possible for you to do today. Then you don't need to worry about tomorrow, because you've done all you can and that you will be supplied with what you need to face it when the timing is right. 

2. Let things go. Live long enough, and everybody and everything in your life will disappoint you, go wrong, or piss you off. You must have the discernment to know what's an abnormal aggravation to ignore, and what's a serious problem that needs to be dealt with. The truth is that we waste a lot of energy going to the mat for things that will pass in a moment, and trying to sweep things under the rug that would be better dealt with sooner rather than later. Here's a good tip: if it passes out of your life, then it's best to let it go and focus on what's still around. Don't let quitters, offenders, and minor irritations rock your world when they'll be on their way faster than lightening. In other words:

3. Act, don't react. Knee jerk reactions rarely make the kind of positive impact that you really need to make life better. Take the time to consider things and decide the best course of action. This goes double for times when emotions are charged and running high - you just can't make rational decisions in that state of mind. Be realistic enough to know yourself and how you typically react, and take the time to stop yourself and ask if what you're about to say or do is in proportion to the situation. It's not easy at first, but it does become more routine the more you do it. 

4. Don't be afraid to ask for help. You really do need to be careful here and make sure that you don't do it indiscriminately, because people are more likely to give you a pass if you don't ask for one all the time. Still, it's alright to say "I need to sit this one out" or "I need a helping hand here" if you're overwhelmed and there's no alignment of Heaven and Earth that can make what needs to happen become a reality. We all do need to bail out sometimes. And remember: the grace you give is the grace you get. The  more willing you are to help out others in their need, the  more willing they are to help you. 

5. Change your thinking and you can change your world. The power of positive thinking isn't just new-age mumbo-jumbo; it actually works. If you dedicate yourself to finding the best in any situation and learning from it, then it's much easier to get through the tough times. Even if you find yourself sitting in a room planning a funeral, you can take comfort in knowing that this is temporary and life will go on and return to normal in time. Nothing lasts forever, and you can usually take something from it, whether it's a lesson, helping others, improving life, or planning for the future. 

6. Be grateful for your blessings. No matter how bad it gets; it could be worse. In regard to the previous suggestion, the best way to change your thinking is to choose to focus on what's right in your life instead of what's wrong. Even if your life is in shambles, the best way to rebuild it is to pick up the pieces that work and start putting them together into something new - and the sooner you start that process, the faster you'll find ourself out of the valley and on the mountaintop. 

7. Stop believing in luck. Frankly, that's a cop-out. I get irritated when people ask "why do bad things happen to good people?" when if they were truly the Christians they proclaim to be, then they'd know that The  Bible says "time and chance happen to us all" (Eccleasiastes 9:11). I don't believe in luck because that places you at the whim of fate and can make you a bitter person. Instead, believe it's God will or it isn't. It's easier to cope when you believe a Greater Power is in charge instead of blind forces converging where ever. 

8. Mind your own business. Nobody's going to take your advice on how to fix their life if yours is a hot mess, so don't bother. Tend to your own matters, and give others the grace to be who they are. If they're adults, then they have the capacity to take care of themselves and their own affairs, so trust them to do so. Plus, not everything works for everybody. All paths may run ill and there are no guarantees that what works for one will work for another. Truthfully, I stopped giving advice years ago, and I find I get along with people a lot better since I broke that nasty habit of spewing out unsolicited advice and opinions. 

9. Stop Muti-Tasking. That's a trend that needs to die. Just as "a jack of all trades is a master of none," so too is it impossible to do several things at once well. I actually found that I'm a lot more productive when I focus on completing one thing at a time, because I make fewer mistakes that I have to go back and correct. Do one thing at a time, and group like tasks together. Focus is the key to accomplishing more in life. 

10. Remember that all things pass in time. C.S. Lewis described "The Law of Undulation" in his book The Screwtape Letters. This states that life is a series of ups and downs, peaks and valleys, and you're always at some point on the wave. If things are good, then you're at a peak so enjoy it. If you're in a valley, know that the only place left is to go up and find hope in that. Nothing lasts forever and in fact, the nature of the universe is change. Stop fearing it, and you may find that your greatest achievements come from the things that knocked you down the hardest. 

Honestly, I could write a dissertation on all I've learned, but I think this list hits the high points. At least, these are the main things that have helped me to keep going, and are hopefully lighting the path to better days ahead. 

That's all today. Take care, and have a great week. 

Bye!

Quotes of the Week

5/11/2014

 
It's amazing how "words in season" come right when you need them. Last week was a doozy, no doubt, but it seemed that the words I needed to hear kept coming at just the right time. Here are some of the winners from last week that kept me encouraged and kept a light on the path before us:

1. When an egg breaks from the outside, the result is death. When it breaks from the inside, the result is life. That reminded me of a line from the song Where the Dead Ships Dwell that says "I won't let the world break me." I know that's a yin and yang comparison, but to me it's plenty relevant: your circumstances can break you, or you can break free of them. It's all a matter of perspective, and where you allow your primary influence to come from: within or without. 

2. Sometimes you win. Sometimes you learn. It seems this goes in seasons, and the seasons of learning are usually longer than the seasons of winning. What I really like about this, though, is that it doesn't say you lose - because you don't have to. If you can be ok with learning, then you really can't lose, because every experience adds wisdom and equips you to do better later. We can learn from every experience, whether it ends out the way we hope/expect or not. 

3. People who shine from within don't need the spotlight. And we go back to real things coming from the inside. This is a perfect time to hear this too, as May tends to be a whirlwind of celebrations, between graduations and Mother's Day. We do all have our "spotlight" moments, but true character comes when nobody's looking. Do you always need accolades and "atta-boys" to stay motivated, or do you do what's right because it's right? This is an issue I've addressed in this blog before, so there's no need to revisit it in length. 

4. Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. (Psalm 37:3-4) I like this because it basically says that it's alright to be human beings, not humans doing. Too often, we think that we have to work and fight to get ahead, and wind out stressed out and weary. But this says that if we do what we're supposed to, then He will not only keep us safe, but bring the desires He planted in our hearts to pass. Wonderful, simple words of encouragement.  

And as a bonus:

5. Once they figure a way to work a dead horse, we'll be next. Likely I'll be the first too. 'Edd,' they'll say, 'dying's no excuse for lying down no more, so get on up and take this spear, you've got the watch tonight." If you work, you know why that's funny. We all feel it sometimes, don't we? That tidbit is from A Sword of Storms, the third book in the A Song of Ice and Fire series. I thought it was hilarious and you'd appreciate it. 

Good words to ponder, I believe. I hope they've inspired you as they have me over the past week. 

That's all today. Take care, and have a great week. 

Bye!

Bleed It Out

5/6/2014

 
I’ve heard that apply pressure, and true character shows. If that’s the case, we’re having quite the reveal now. It seems that a lot of people are struggling with a lot of different things these days. My father-in-law is still recovering from his brain surgery last week in the hospital, but we certainly aren’t alone. I know others struggling with ill family members, terminal illness, accidents, and a couple of sudden, unexpected deaths. All of these people work, and all of them are dealing with work issues on top of their personal issues.

I’d say life is bleeding us out now. And we’re all seeing who’s real and who’s full of crap right now, too, because pressure draws out something else: drama. Or at least, you find out who’s a spotlight hog and who’s prone to logic in times like these. Truth always reveals itself, and it’s usually at times like these when there’s no place to hide. You see who’s the love and compassion lighting your way, and who’s the black hole that sucks you dry and gives nothing in return.  In turn, you see where your energy should be so you can get the hell out of the event horizon of a vacuum and go toward the light. And you don’t forget it, even when the whole mess is over.

That’s the one inconvenient fact that too many people forget. Masks can’t be put back on once they fall off. That’s why character bleeds with pressure. Once it’s tapped, you can’t ooze it back in. It’s out there for the whole world to see.

You also learn a lot about yourself in times like these. You learn how tough you really are; and how well you stand up to the pressure. You see if you’ve really grown as much as you think you have. It’s the truest test of progress and maturity. If you do better holding your center in this trial than you did the last, then you’re good. If not, you know the targets for improvement.

I’m very happy right now that I read The Secret a few weeks ago. What I learned has been a tremendous help with coping, and has helped me to keep a better balance than I have in the past. Certainly, I’ve still had my not flattering moments, but I do hope that I’m doing better at capturing the anxious or worried thoughts and replacing them with prayers of hope and healing – and not just for me and my family, but for everybody who’s struggling right now.

If you’re struggling right now, let me offer you encouragement and hope. Look outside at everything blooming right now. That’s life – all that green and blue and color is everything in the world alive, and where there’s life, there’s hope. We all struggle and you certainly aren’t alone. Don’t allow yourself to be defeated. Stop looking down, where things die and are buried, and look up to the sun, where things live and breathe and hope. Change your focus from your worry to your hope.

If you’re doing well, I congratulate you. Nobody wants to rain on your parade, and you certainly deserve to enjoy good fortune. Just don’t forget compassion for those who aren’t on the mountaintop with you. Taking a moment to offer a word in season will multiply your blessings and keep you in the sun.

And if you’re just plugging along on the journey, take hope in both. Laugh with those who laugh, and mourn with those who mourn. You’re heading one way or the other. Err on the side of caution by bestowing good, positive energy on all. Whether you’re a companion or a comfort, you can’t go wrong.

We’ll be fine. Things happen and there’s no use fretting over the why’s. There’s a pretty good chance the answer will never come (certainly not to our satisfaction), so it’s best to get alright with the unanswered questions.  “Time and chance happen to them all” (Ecclesiastes 9:11), so as it hurts, so shall it heal and give way to joy in due time. Life is always in motion. That’s why it’s called a journey. So let’s bleed out our truth, heal, become better people, and make sure we’re moving in the right direction, now and always.

That’s all today. Take care and have a great rest of the week.

Bye! 

My Lenten Journey 6 - Sometimes, You Lose

4/8/2014

 
I recently read a blog entry from a writer who's calling it quits. I don’t know this person. It was shared on social media through another writer that I do know, along with a note on what a shame it is for a person to quit while they’re ahead. When I first saw it, I agreed. Writing is a tough business, and criticism is part of the territory (especially for indie authors). Goodness knows, I have my own war stories. But when I read this entry, I realized there was much more than just “hanging in there” involved with her decision. It turns out the writer has severe depression, and those occasional harsh reviews that inevitably happen  were hindering her treatment from this debilitating illness.

Yes, it’s a shame for her to give up writing, but I disagree about it being a mistake. Better to break your dreams than yourself. And as much as we hate to admit it, the simple fact of the matter is that sometimes, you lose.

This isn’t popular in this “you can do anything” and “never give up” world we live in, but take one look at the American Idol auditions and I think we’ll all agree that we have a tendency to flatter ourselves into thinking we’re capable of much more than we really are. We’re human beings – not robots, not aliens, not cyborgs or superheroes or sorcerers or dragonslayers. It’s impossible to succeed at all we do and win every battle. Inevitably, the day comes when the world conquers you and you have to face the brokenness of the reality that you aren’t all that. Even heroes take their beatings. It’s how they learn what they’re up against and, invariably, how to win where it matters most.

Defeat happens, even when it shouldn’t. I think we’ve all been in situations where we think we’re capable of doing more than we really can, and we’re faced with making decisions that hurt. We’re told to hang in there and not to quit, but when the price is too high then it makes sense to take a step back and consider whether you need to be on this road. Resistance is natural, but destruction isn’t. As C.S. Lewis once wrote, if you realize you’re doing a math problem wrong, then forging ahead to the end won’t yield a right result. You only get the right result from going back and starting over. Proceeding from the point of an error is a mistake in and of itself. It takes prayer and a great deal of discernment to know if you’re facing natural resistance to the right path, or killing yourself (spiritually, at least) on the wrong one. And we’re very good at tricking ourselves into believing that anything we want badly enough is God’s will.

Or it may not be anything that we did wrong. Like the case with this writer, there may be nothing wrong with the path we’re on. We may do everything right, but things go wrong. Ecclesiastes 9:11 says it best: “I saw that under the sun the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, nor bread to the wise, nor riches to the intelligent, nor favor to the skillful; but time and chance happen to them all.”

Sometimes, you lose. You just don't get it, and it hurts. The good news is that failure isn’t fatal. You live, you learn, you put one foot in front of the other until you find a better tomorrow. Sometimes, doing what’s right means a sacrifice that hurts terribly and seems all wrong. But it’s deceptive because the peace comes later, when we ourselves become the heroes that learn what we’re up against and find a greater victory.

That’s all today. Take care and have a great rest of the week.

Bye!

Something Worth Encouraging You For

2/1/2014

 
I wrote a blog entry earlier this week on something worth pissing you off for. Well, it only seems fair to balance the scales and write an entry on something worth encouraging you for. And since it seems that I tend to ponder things deeper and write more when I'm working on writing projects, it so happens that I have one for you.

I was running errands on my lunch break Thursday when I drove by a church sign that read: "Humility is born from humiliation." At first I thought no, that's not true. I don't think it's necessary to break people to make then realize they aren't "all that." But I ran into a problem right away when I tried to think of a time when I learned humility without being knocked flat on my behind or completely overwhelmed to the point of helplessness. Hmm. I've heard it said that more lessons come from pain than joy. It seems that's right. I see, in fact, that every advancement I've made in life was preceded by defeat or being knocked back a notch:

The school refused to put me in the most advanced math classes when I started high school because I missed the eligibility requirement by 2 points on a standardized test. But my senior year, that opened up one more class in my schedule. I took college level psychology - and found my major.

After struggling through a terrible junior year in college where it seemed that all of my classes were a struggle and all my relationships were in conflict, I sought help through tutors, advisors, and councilors at the University. It worked. My senior year, I made the President's List both semesters, was selected to work on a great independent study project (where I gained experience that helped me get the job I have now), graduated with honors, and was engaged to Rick.

After struggling with our finances for years and then an infection that took three months to heal, Rick and I were finally able to build our home.

After a major work move, I got two publication contracts and became an independent author, thanks to the perseverance and research skills I learned from working with others to make the move successful.

I wondered why this is so. I suppose the whole "free will" thing has a lot to do with it. We all want to be important. But the truth is that we don't run the world, and it seems that we need reminders every now and then that we can't do it all. The good news is that the One who made the world wants to give us His power and work through us. He just has to make sure we're ready to let him do that. We can do a lot, but we CAN'T do it all. And I suppose coming to the end of our rope is the thing that prepares us for the miracles that take us from disaster to destiny.

I've spent my career working in professional licensing, and I can tell you that one of the most embarrassing things is to have someone ask you or one of your Board members "why did you license that person?" It's an undeniable fact that the standards set for initial licensure become the "minimal competency level" standards for the profession, and you can't force people to rise above that once they're licensed. It's encouraged and supported through license renewals, continuing education requirements, and private societies that offer opportunities to connect with others and grow in the profession. But we can't force them to take anything from that, and the sad truth is that there are some people that won't do any more than they have to. Thankfully, it's extremely rare that this happens, but everything is subject to opinion and inevitably it will.


Well, God doesn't settle for minimal competency, nor will He allow us to. And humility is how He helps us rise to the next blessing. My Bible reading was in Job yesterday, and I was struck by one verse: "The Lord blessed the latter part of Job's life more than the former part." (Job 42:12) After being utterly destroyed; after losing everything except his life; after being ridiculed by family and friends and even chastised by God Himself; Job acknowledged his limits and pledged to lean on God. And God was pleased and grew him, above and beyond all he ever had.

My point in this entry is to encourage you not to give up or to give in to discouragement if you're facing a tough time. We all do. Maybe you made a mistake and need to make it right. Maybe you didn't do anything to deserve it, and this is God preparing you for a blessing to come. Whatever the case, have faith. Human beings were created to live in eternity with the Lord, so the story never ends. Humility means joining your ability with God's strength to rise to the next level. So don't fear. Rise. You can do it. The One Who created the Heavens and the Earth will make you able.

But you can't do it alone. Because sorry folks, but you're not all that.

That's all today. Take care, and have a great weekend.

Bye! 









Habits

1/31/2014

 
I recently started reading Making Good Habits – Breaking Bad Habits, by Joyce Meyer, and one chapter in a line already got me thinking. She wrote “most of what we do on a daily basis is habit.” It reminded me of something somebody said in a seminar several years ago along these same lines. She said, “you don’t realize how many of our emotional reactions are actually habits. We subconsciously remember how we reacted the last time something similar happened, and jump right back to it. The way to gain control is to stop for a moment and ask yourself ‘why do I feel this way?’ You’d be amazed at how much more productive you are when you get a handle on your emotions.”

Both this line and the memory of that seminar got me to thinking. It’s easy to see how some things are habits. My Bible reading is a habit. Prayer time is a habit. Listening to my weather radio while I get dressed is a habit. The times we eat lunch and supper are habits. Chores and errands are habits. Even many of the things I do with my writing and promoting it are habits. All of these were formed, on purpose, based on what works. But how many other habits are part of my daily life that might not be so effective? Are there things I do that may be holding me back? Or other ways that would be more productive, if I made a simple change?

I’ve often said that changing how you think about things is the hardest thing to do, and now I realize why. It requires a tremendous effort to pay attention to things we normally don’t notice and take control of it to form new habits!  And often, people get frustrated in the process and just give up, thinking it’s not worth it – or worse yet, “if people love me, they will accept me as I am and get over it.”

And the devil absolutely loves that attitude, because he knows that the constant cycle of frustration/fight/forgiveness is slowly chipping away at your relationships, and the process gets slower every time you take another round. The truth is, it does matter, and it has a bigger impact on your relationships than you think. Even small things can chip away at something good until all that’s left are the crumbs of broken trust and resentment that overshadow any good sentiment that once held the dust together.

It’s been four years since I underwent my major mental overhaul (thanks to a major life overhaul), and I can tell you that my biggest struggle was accepting things as they are, and not as I want them to be. I still struggle with that from time to time, most recently with my parakeet’s nerve injury. I hate to see Ollie hurt, and was under a tremendous amount of anxiety and stress over it. Nothing I did seemed to help and I was so aggravated! You know what changed that? Getting the flu. I was literally too sick to worry all the time. But a surprising thing happened. I found that, when I quit hovering over Ollie all the time and peeping on him every few minutes, he improved drastically. He’s not healed, and these cold days knock him down more than I like, but I quickly saw that when I accepted him in the condition he’s in now – and not the condition he was in six months ago, which I want him to return to – he did better. He started eating more. He started chirping and singing every now and then. He seemed to relax and accept his own healing as I relaxed and accepted it. He even gets spunky and sassy every now and then. I see his personality coming back. But it didn’t happen until I backed off, trusted the Lord to heal Ollie, and let it go.

If changing my behavior can impact a parakeet, imagine how it can impact other people.

It’s something worth thinking about. I know I have been. Yes, people should accept you as you are, but don’t you want to do your part to make your relationships the best they can be? How much better can your relationships be if you replace nagging with trusting? Complaining with compromising? Threats with respect? Or better yet, accepting people and things as they are and working with them instead of demanding that “they change or else?” Ah, that’s one to really be cautious of. When threats start, “or else” is often the more attractive offer.

Consider the parakeet. If it can improve through changes in human behavior, isn’t it worth a try? I mentioned two entries ago how negative energy drives people away. That too is a habit. And I think that if you really want to be happy, if you really want your relationships to be the best they can be, if you really want your life to be the best it can be, then you’ll agree that it’s worth breaking bad habits of thought, emotion, and behavior to bring it about. It takes work, and it takes time. But , as Meyer says, if you’re determined to make a positive change and focus on what you hope to gain instead of what hurts, then you can do it.

And again, more support to what I said two entries ago: change your mind, change your life. Or, as the Book of Proverbs says, "as a man thinks in his heart, so he is."

It’s worth thinking about. I’m happy with my life, but I believe it’s because I’m always looking for ways to make things better. Learning is a lifelong process, after all. And it’s a process I’m committed to.

That’s all today. Have a Happy Friday and a great weekend.

Bye!

The Best Things I've Learned From Fiction

12/3/2013

 
For all of the lessons that life itself has taught me, I have to say that I've picked up some good tidbits from fiction as well. Whether it's from books, movies, or TV, I've learned a few things that have been invaluable in reality. They say truth is stranger than fiction, but I think it's more accurate to say that sometimes, fiction reflects truth all too well. For example:

1. Sometimes, you can never go back. We saw it in The Lord of the Rings trilogy, when Frodo returned to The Shire after his quest. He tried to return to life as it was before, but after all that he had experienced, he couldn't, and wound out sailing to the West. We saw it in the close of The Inheritance Cycle, where, after the enemy was finally defeated and peace was restored, Eragon elected to retreat to a realm outside of Alagasia because he needed time to process all that had happened to him on his own journey. We even saw it in the close of The Clone Wars when, after she was acquitted of murder, Ashoka refused the offer to return to The Jedi Order because "I have to work things out on my own now." Sometimes, the journey affects us in ways that makes it impossible to go back to the same old, same old. The hurts are too deep to fully heal, as it was with Frodo. The changes you go through are too big, and you aren't the same person, like with Eragon. You've see too much that you didn't know and need time to figure out who you are, as with Ashoka. I know these are the endings that readers/viewers don't like, but sadly it is reality sometimes. I know I've been through experiences that left me a different person, and I can say from experience that some things shift your paradigm too much to stay the person you were.

2. Yes, angels are sent to protect us, but it's best to stay out of their way. If you watch the TV series Supernatural, you know that angels haven't always been portrayed in the best light. While I'll admit that I believe the show creators have taken some literary license on their interpretation, I also feel that they're more right on some things than we'd be comfortable with admitting. You are aware that those beautiful angels in fur-lines robes that you see in the stores now are 100% fiction, right? Angels are warriors, and I can tell you that they aren't playing harps and singing all day. They're fighting demons and keeping us safe (both from the forces of hell against us and the messes we get ourselves in). And in case you haven't thought about it, they see all of creation (this world and "the next"), and they don't have the gift of free will. You better believe that their methods (if we knew them) would probably seem somewhat harsh and tough at times because their perspective is radically different from anything that we could possibly know or understand. Take a look in The Bible, and everybody that saw an angel fell on their face out of reverential fear. Yes, I believe angels are good. Yes, I believe they protect us. Yes, I love them. But I know well enough that they don't have time for mundane human crap when they're fighting the forces of hell. So I offer them my utmost respect, and get out of the way so they can do their job.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why I refuse to put an angel on top of my Christmas tree, or to have them on my Christmas cards. They don't have time for that.

3. Fear is the greatest monster we face. I wasn't as impressed with The Green Lantern movie as I hoped to be, but they hit on an indisputable fact: the worst thing humanity faces is fear. Fear causes more problems than any other thing in this world. It keeps us from doing what we should be doing and puts us in ruts we aren't meant to be in. Fear is a trap that kills us slowly, from the inside out. The only way to have the life of fullness and abundance that we're supposed to have is to find our courage and move forward, despite our fear. And that is the hardest thing in the world to do.

4. Some people can't be saved. This is one I really don't like to admit, but sadly it's true. And while I've experienced the frustration of trying to help people and having them reject it, it took Arrow, the CW series now in it's second season, to realize that it's not personal, it's just fact. This really hit home when Detective Lance told Thea Queen that "The Hood" (as they called him in Season 1) had sent 26 people to his morgue, and that was two episodes before the season finale. I shuddered at that, because he was being marked as a killer and yet those were 26 people that he wanted to turn over to justice, but the circumstances didn't allow it - they tried to kill him or others in their escape.

This is an extreme example, of course. Most of us don't deal with organized crime or defending ourselves or others in life or death situations. But we do deal with trying to help people, and they reject our help, just to come to harm later. People reject our advice. They slap away a helpful hand. They deny those trying to help them to a better way, because correction hurts and they're comfortable with their own way, no matter how it hurts them or others. And really, as much as it hurts, we shouldn't be surprised. Even Jesus couldn't save them all. Why should we think we deserve a better track record?

5. Sometimes, the best way to flush out a leak is to flood it. When you suspect there's a busybody, traitor, or blabbermouth in your midst, the natural inclination is to zip it up and confide in a close circle of friends. And indeed, this is advice that I accepted - until I started watching Game of Thrones. Do you remember the time Tyrian Lannister suspected that someone on The Small Council was leaking things to the Queen (who was also his sister), so he told each member that he planned to marry off her daughter to a different person, then waited to see which one she chewed him out about? The guy he caught didn't think it was funny, but every other member of the council had to admit that it was a very clever ploy and they admired it. I did too, so I've tried it a few times. Folks, it works like a charm. And in this day of technological advances in communications, it works in about 2-4 hours. It's not a trick to overdo, and you certainly don't want to throw anything "real" that needs to remain under discretion. But throw out a tidbit here or there, and see what comes back. You'd be surprised at how fast people forget to play coy when they're hit with something unexpected that sets off their alarm bells.

Yes, it's amazing what you can learn from fiction. And maybe that's why we love it - because sometimes, we can learn valuable things about reality.

That's all today. Take care, and have a great week.

Embracing The New

8/22/2013

 
Picture
We got new telephones with headsets at the office last week. If you’ve been watching my social media posts, you know that I had a bit of an issue when they announced the change because they mentioned “tethered headsets,” and visions of assimilation by the Borg (from Star Trek) ran through my head. It turns out that the headsets are wireless, so my fears of being bound to the desk by wires and cords were alleviated. In fact, I’ve found the headset to be quite nice this past week – especially since our call volume has picked up with exam registration for one of my programs nearing a deadline. 

There are a few people that are taking a bit longer to adjust to the new headsets. Sure, it was a pain getting it adjusted, but once that was done, it’s kind of nice. I can look up files on the computer or even check our file cabinets without putting someone on hold. As you can see, it’s barely noticeable. And my neck doesn’t hurt at the end of the day anymore. I’m not sure why there are some that find it difficult. It’s certainly made working easier for me this past week. I think people are seeing the benefits of them now that they've had some time to adjust.

I'm pleasantly surprised at people taking to them this quickly. I'm used to hearing people complain about change and new technology. There are complaints about new systems, complaints about new ways, and complaints about "messing things up." People say they're afraid it will take them longer because they "don't know that way, but I think it has more to do with not wanting to change. They don’t have to make an adjustment, so they don’t want to. And while it’s optional, I don’t understand why they wouldn’t want to try something that can make life easier for them. 

The same goes for so many things. I’ve known people that refused to get computers for the same reason. I even knew a few people that refused to get cell phones until the city started removing pay phones from our area. They claimed they were scared they’d mess them up, but I think it’s the learning curve they feared more than anything. Learning how to use new things does require patience and dedication, and some people just don’t want to put forth the effort unless they’re forced to do it. It seems like laziness on their part, too. What they don’t realize is their refusal to learn is resulting in making their life harder, because it takes them twice as long to do it the old way. Change is the path to progress, and the reason these constant upgrades keep coming is because they’re saving time, energy, and frustration. Believe me, I know this from experience with going from a Department that had all paper files to a Department that’s all digital: I find things much faster with a few clicks in my database now than I did digging through file cabinets a few years ago. My productivity is much higher, and those new computer and tech skills are things I’ve taken to my writing, which as resulted in progressing over the years as well. Sometimes, you can apply it to your home life too, and that’s saving you time that you could spend on other things. 

I don’t understand why people wouldn’t want to give something that can make life easier a chance. Taking the time now to learn something that makes me work faster and more efficiently is well worth the investment on the time it will save me later. Technology helps me to do so much more faster, better, and more efficiently. I certainly want to take advantage of anything that can help me. I know that this headset has literally saved me aches and pains this past week, and I like it. I’m not taking aspirin for that pain in my head, neck and shoulders that used to plague me on days when I was on the phone a lot nearly as much this past week. And because I feel better, I’ve accomplished a lot more at home and with my writing, too. 

I guess it’s a matter of personal preference. If others want to grapple with paper files, rickety file cabinets, and receivers and cords, well, to each his own. 

That’s all today. Have a great weekend. 

Bye!


10 Things We Shouldn't Say

5/30/2013

 
There are some phrases in widespread, common use that seem to be universal hot buttons to piss people off. Really, I don’t understand how it became commonplace for people to say things that erode the very respect that relationships are built on, and yet I hear people say it – and complain about having these things said to them – frequently. 

Certainly, we should always be honest and authentic in our dealings with people, but discernment is an absolute necessity in our dealings with ALL people. Just because it flies through your brain doesn’t mean it needs to fly out of your mouth, and in fact there are many times when it’s best to keep that thought in your head and fake it till you make it with your words (or silence, depending on the situation). For example, here are some phrases you should eliminate (or at least, drastically reduce) in your vocabulary that will garner more respect, motivate people to cooperate and work well with you, and make you appear more intelligent and savvy:

1.   “Whatever.” Nothing coveys the ignorant-inconsiderate-jerk trifecta like this one word phrase. You have the entire English language at your disposal and that’s all you’ve got? If it is, then it’s time to recognize the uncomfortable fact that sometimes, the best course of action is to gracefully back away and let silence be golden. And if you refuse to exercise the right to remain silent, then a simple “I hope that works out for you and wish you luck” is much more dignified than throwing out something that makes you look like a cross between an immature tween and a person that’s learning English as a second language -  and isn’t quite getting it.

2.    “Do what you’ve got to do.” I don’t hear this one as much as I used to, but it’s still out there, and it’s a sin for the same reasons as “whatever.” More accurately, that’s redneck for “I don’t like what you’re doing and would move Heaven and Earth to stop you, but that would reveal me as a selfish jerk to the rest of the world and I don’t want to do that, so go on and get this over with so you can get back to doing things that make me happy.” It isn’t your job to like or even understand everything that other people do, so let go and accept that people have a right to lead their lives, do things, and make decisions that work best for them regardless of what you say, think, or need. Instead, say “I understand this is important to you.” Even if you don’t and you hope it blows up in their face, just fake it and at least acknowledge their right to live as they see fit.  Because I guarantee you’ve done things that made them go “Hmmm” in the past . Plus,  if you want people to stay interested in your life, then you have to at least act like you give a crap about them and their life, even if you don’t care about them any more than you care about the extra 40 minutes in a Martian day. 

3.   “That’s not my problem.” I stand back when people say this because it’s an open invitation for the universe to hit you with its best shot, and that’s a challenge it ALWAYS accepts. Sure, you aren’t responsible for every single thing that happens in the world, and there are some things that aren’t your business, but have some dignity in declining to accept responsibility that you feel isn’t yours. “I’m sorry I can’t help you with that” is much more gracious and doesn’t invite fate, the universe, the world, or whatever you wish to call it to deliver an entirely new batch of problems into your life. Fake sympathy for the other persons’ plight even if you don’t really feel it because you WILL be at the receiving end of this one day, and the measure you get will be the measure you’ve given. It happens to us all.

4.  “You don’t really want that,” or “Stop wasting your time on that and do this instead.” Excuse me, when did God appoint you to His position, because that’s what it looks like you’re playing at with either variation of this. You have no way of knowing what’s in other peoples’ hearts or what plans are in store for them, and they aren’t required to get your approval for it, either. People have a right to make their own decisions. You never know what might happen and statements like this may very well make a fool of you one day. Don’t take a chance. 

5.  “I told you so.” Even if you preface it with the I-hate-to-say-it-but clause, it’s still ridiculous because they already know. Demonstrate some maturity and don’t gloat over somebody’s failings, even if they asked for it and everybody knew it was foolishness from the start. As I said in the last statement, people have a right to make their own decisions and that means having the grace to let them make their own mistakes. Pray they’ve learned from the experience, and don’t gloat lest you wander into folly someday. Because none of us are as smart as we think we are. 
 
6.    “ I did that too, and let me tell you how I did it better.” Nobody likes a know-it-all or a show off, and a constant need to one-up people blinks “I’m insecure!” brighter than a digital billboard. You don’t have to be in the spotlight every minute of every day. Back down and let others have their day in the sun every now and then. Because we all know that nobody’s done everything under the sun, and there will always be people out there that have done it bigger, better and more recently than you have. Let go of the competition to always be #1 and learn to be happy with the life the Lord gave you.

7.   “If I were you, I’d …” Turn off anybody that prefaces a statement with this immediately, because it’s a clear sign that they don’t know what they’re talking about. Wisdom gives options. Experience shares insight. Ignorance says that if they were you, they’d go out and kick the world in the you-know-where, and that’s most often foolishness that would make a bigger mess of things if anybody were dumb enough to take this advice. Plus, they wouldn’t have the guts to actually do it, because some people are good at telling people to do things they wouldn’t dare do themselves.

8.     “You should make them do it.” Guess what? Scientists have found the center of the universe and it’s not you. That’s the fastest way to run a person out of your life. You don’t make anybody do anything they don’t want to do, and if you try to then trust me – you’re ego can’t handle what they really think about you. If you have to control someone every minute to “keep them in line,” then you’re trying to force them into a place or relationship where they don’t belong. Don’t beg people to be your friend or try to force them to your will. Pray for what Joyce Meyer refers to as “divine connections.” Those are friends and acquaintances that you get along with so well that you don’t want to change them because you appreciate how their uniqueness enriches your life. 

9.     “I would NEVER do that/accept that/put up with that.” Never say never or the Lord will make you do it to show you who the boss really is. One never in your life that’s absolute: you never know what life has in store for you. Someday you could well be dining on crow while dealing with something that you thought you were too smart/special/good for. Life has a way of humbling us, and the “I would never” statements are a GPS on how to get that done. 

10.   Anything other than “I’m sorry for your loss” and “I’m praying for you and your family” at a visitation or funeral. Anything else sounds stupid and believe me, there’s nothing clever or inspirational you can say that will get through people in the depths of grief. The dumbest things I’ve ever heard have all been said at visitations and/or funerals because people try to justify death and offer comfort in religious platitudes. Folks, I’m Christian too, but this isn’t seminary or time to play preacher. I remember what C.S. Lewis wrote about death not being natural because human beings weren’t created to die and it’s the most painful consequence that we pay for sin. He’s absolutely right. There’s nothing right about death and there’s no way to wrap it up in pretty phrases or platitudes that makes it suck less. So give it up. Don’t engage in conversations with the bereaved if they try to start one, either. This isn’t the time or place to engage in theological discussions, discuss anything beyond condolences for the loss (no gossip or “what’s up with me” statements), and it certainly isn’t appropriate to leverage your personality or make a big impression. It’s a subdued occasion so dial it down, make an appearance, and for goodness sake, shut up.

Maybe you relate to some of this and are nodding, saying thank you for revealing it! Or maybe you see it as a calling out. I certainly don’t mean it that way, and I admit that I’m guilty of uttering some of these phrases. In fact, I  had to work at cutting the “whatever” and “I told you so” out of my vocabulary, and I get along with people so much better now that it’s gone. My point is not to say “shame on you.” It’s  to shed light on small things that chip away at trust and give guidance that I’ve learned in building bridges to cooperative relationships that last. It takes time and effort, but if modifying my vocabulary slightly will help with that, then it’s an effort worth making. I believe if you’ve read this far then you believe it’s a worthy effort, too.

That’s all today. Take care. I hope you have a Happy Friday tomorrow and a great weekend. 
 
Bye!

When Your Leader Leaves

2/12/2013

 
News of the Pope’s resignation yesterday sent the world into shock, and yet it seems to me that it’s one more incident in a quitting epidemic that’s becoming commonplace in my corner of the world. For the past year, it’s seemed that everywhere I turn people are moving on. Time to change jobs, time to move on, time to retire, time to get anywhere but here. I certainly don’t begrudge people making decisions that better their life (and leave their current places for people who will blossom in the spaces they leave behind), but it brings up an interesting question. 

What do you do when your leader leaves? 
 
I recently read a saying that great leaders don’t create followers, they create other leaders. I think this is true,
and the truth of how good a leader they were can be seen in how the“troops” carry on once they’re gone. If the strength of any organization is in the individuals, then these are the times when you see if the previous leader  created wise, competent, individuals that can keep flowing with the spirit of the organization or mindless drones that have to be led by the nose everywhere. And surviving this “sink or swim” time after a leader leaves brings to light two very important facts:

 1.       Leaders are meant to guide us, not carry us. Internal motivation is the driving factor that should be
moving every individual everywhere, regardless of the circumstances. Did you know that you can still flourish under a lousy leader if you’re motivated enough to seek knowledge and opportunity on your own? It’s true. If a person has a mindset that they are only going to do what they’re told and will never do one thing more than they have to, even the best leader in the world can’t make them succeed. In fact, I’d go so far as to say that following is the fastest road to failure. If you don’t eventually find the strength and courage to stand on your own then you’ll never get further than you are right now. Sure, leaders set the standard and hold us accountable to it, but it’s our responsibility to rise above the minimum. 

2.       Our actions do affect others, and they have a right to react to that, for better or for worse. This is a sticky one. Of course, you should do your very best all the time. Giving your all will help you succeed and it will help the people around you as well. But you also have to realize that we live in a community, so if you decide to shirk
your responsibilities, do the bare minimum, or skip out, then people will react, and they have a right to. Sure, sometimes you have your reasons, and they might be very good reasons. Sometimes you need the grace and mercy of others to get through tough times. Just make sure you don’t make a habit of being a “drama queen” or somebody who’s life is fraught with problems, or you create  unnecessary hardship for yourself. And while I’m on the subject, that brings up an interesting third point:

3.       You never know when you might have to recross a bridge someday. When I started my career, I moved from one division of my agency to another. Three years later, they consolidated the divisions, and all of my old colleagues moved in my office. I was shocked – I never expected that to happen, but it did. I was also very glad I left with a sense of humility and gratitude to them for helping me start my career. So whether you stay, go, or leave it alone, it’s wise to remember that you reap what you sow, and not all paths are linear. You never know where you might come back around – or when someone might come back around to you! 
 
So what does this all mean. How do you survive when your leader leaves? By relying on your own strength, and the strength of those around you. That’s why it’s important to have internal motivation – so you can keep things running even with a significant absence. That’s why it’s important to be accountable not just to your leaders, but to everybody around you – to form a stronger community that works together efficiently. That’s why you mind your manners and always give your best – to help others and shine that light of hope that even though it might be dark and confusing, there is hope and that hope will help you as you find new leaders for the next chapter. 

People come and people go, and there’s nothing you can do about it. You just have to learn from the leaders you have and realize that they are helping to form you into a stronger person that’s able to stand – no matter what. 

That’s all today. Take care and have a good week.

Bye!

<<Previous

    Escape Reality

    By day, I'm a program assistant. By night, I'm an independent author. My fiction offers an escape from the reality of day-to-day life. See how my experiences lead to creating new worlds! 

    Archives

    March 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    June 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013
    December 2012
    November 2012
    October 2012
    September 2012
    August 2012
    July 2012
    June 2012
    May 2012
    April 2012
    March 2012
    February 2012
    January 2012
    December 2011
    November 2011
    October 2011
    September 2011
    August 2011
    July 2011
    June 2011
    May 2011
    April 2011

    Categories

    All
    10
    109
    125
    2
    2011
    2012
    2012 Election
    2013
    5
    9-11
    Ability
    Abundance
    Abuse
    Accent
    Accept
    Accident
    Accountability
    Accountable
    Act
    Actions
    Adapt
    Adjust
    Adjustment
    Administrative
    Admissions
    Adult
    Advertise
    Advice
    Affairs
    Age
    Aggrivate
    Airplane
    Airport
    Alarm
    Album
    Aliens
    Alive
    Allergies
    Allergy
    Alone
    Am
    Amazon
    Amazon.com
    Ambition
    America
    Anger
    Angry
    Ankle
    Anniversary
    Anonymity
    Answer
    Answers
    Antibiotic
    Anxiety
    Anywhere But Here
    Appreciate
    Apps
    Area
    Argue
    Arizona
    Arrogance
    Arrow
    Art
    Artist
    Arts
    Ascend
    Ask
    Associates
    Assume
    Attack
    Attention
    Attitude
    Attitudes
    Authentic
    Authenticity
    Author
    Authority
    Authors
    Automobile
    Automobiles
    Autumn
    Awesome
    Awkward
    Bacteria
    Bad
    Balance
    Band
    Baseball
    Batman
    Battle
    Battlefield
    Battleground Earth
    Beach
    Behave
    Behavior
    Behind
    Believe
    Benefit
    Best
    Better
    Bible
    Bills
    Binge
    Bin Ladin
    Bird
    Birdhouses
    Birds
    Birth Control
    Birthday
    Birthdays
    Blame
    Bleed
    Bless
    Blessing
    Blessings
    Block
    Blog
    Blog Hop
    Blurry
    Body
    Bold
    Book
    Books
    Book Sense
    Bored
    Borrow
    Boss
    Boston
    Boston Bombings
    Boston Marathon
    Box
    Boy
    Boyfriend
    Brain
    Brainwash
    Break
    Breaking Bad
    Breaks
    Brother
    Budget
    Budgies
    Build
    Burn
    Burnout
    Bury
    Business
    Busy
    Calendar
    Call
    Camera
    Camp
    Cancel
    Cancer
    Captain America
    Car
    Care
    Career
    Cars
    Cat
    Catalyst
    Catching
    Cd
    Celebrate
    Celebration
    Cell Phone
    Cemetery
    Challenge
    Challenges
    Chance
    Change
    Changes
    Chaos
    Chapter
    Character
    Characters
    Charisma
    Cheer
    Cheerleading
    Cheeseburger
    Chess
    Children
    Chloe
    Choices
    Chore
    Christ
    Christian
    Christmas
    Church
    Circumstance
    Circumstances
    Civilized
    Classic
    Clean
    Cleaning
    Cliques
    Clock
    Clown
    Cold
    Colleague
    Colleagues
    College
    Color
    Colorado
    Colorado Massacare
    Colorado River
    Combination
    Comedy
    Comfort
    Commandments
    Commercials
    Commitment
    Committee
    Common
    Common Sense
    Competition
    Complain
    Complaining
    Complete
    Computer
    Computers
    Con
    Conditioning
    Confederate Memorial Day
    Conference
    Confession
    Confidence
    Conflict
    Conform
    Conformity
    Confused
    Congregation
    Consequence
    Consequences
    Console
    Conspiracy Theories
    Constituant
    Contect
    Contentment
    Continues
    Contract
    Control
    Conure
    Conure Corner
    Conures
    Conventional
    Cook
    Cool
    Cope
    Copy
    Coral Gables
    Cough
    Council
    Courage
    Cover
    Cover Art
    Craft
    Crafts
    Craft Show
    Crash
    Crazy
    Crazy. Odd
    Create
    Creation
    Creative
    Creativity
    Creeper
    Crisis
    Cross Stitch
    Cross Stitch
    Cross Stitching
    Cross Stitching
    Crowd
    Cry
    C.s. Lewis
    Curses
    Customer
    Cut
    Cw
    Cwp
    Cycle
    Dad
    Damage
    Dance
    Dark Side
    Date
    Day
    Day Off
    Days
    Dead
    Deadlines
    Death
    Debate
    Debunk
    Deceive
    Decision
    Decisions
    Defeat
    Defend
    Delimma
    Deliverance
    Dell
    Demanding
    Democracy
    Demon
    Department
    Depression
    Derision
    Desert
    Design
    Despair
    Destruction
    Details
    Detox
    Devices
    Devil
    Devotion
    Devotional
    Devotionals
    Diamond
    Die
    Diet
    Difference
    Different
    Digital
    Directions
    Disappear
    Disbelief
    Discernment
    Discipline
    Discount
    Discourage
    Discouragement
    Discover
    Discretion
    Disruption
    Dissociation
    Distracted
    Divas
    Divide
    Divine
    Division
    Djinn
    Doctor
    Doing
    Done
    Donkey
    Door
    Doubt
    Downswing
    Dragon
    Dragons
    Drama
    Dreams
    Dreary
    Drive
    Dud
    Dvd
    Early Bird
    Earth
    Earthquake
    Easter
    Eat
    Ebb
    Ebook
    Ebooks
    Economy
    Edit
    Editing
    Editor
    Edits
    Effect
    Effective
    Efficient
    Effort
    Elect
    Election
    Electric
    Electricity
    Electronics
    Email
    Emotion
    Emotional
    Emotions
    Empathy
    End
    Endings
    Enemy
    Energy
    Engagement
    Engineer
    English
    Enjoy
    Entertainment
    Envy
    Epiphany
    Epublish
    Ereader
    E Reader
    E-reader
    Errands
    Escape
    Escaping
    Etiquette
    Evil
    Evolution
    Evolve
    Example
    Ex Boyfriend
    Ex-boyfriend
    Excerpt
    Excitement
    Exciting
    Exclusive
    Exercise
    Exhaustion
    Expect
    Expectation
    Expectations
    Experience
    Experimenting
    Facebook
    Facets
    Fact
    Facts
    Fail
    Failure
    Fair
    Faith
    Faking
    Fall
    Family
    Fanily
    Fantasy
    Fast And Furious
    Fate
    Fault
    Favorite
    Favorites
    Favoritism
    Fear
    Feathered Frenzy
    Feature
    Feed
    Feedback
    Feel
    Feelings
    Female
    Feminine
    Fiction
    Fight
    Finale
    Financial
    Finding
    Fire
    Firearms
    Firestarter
    Fish
    Flash Fiction
    Flickr
    Flinch
    Flow
    Flu
    Flu Shots
    Flu Shots
    Fly
    Focus
    Follow
    Followers
    Food
    Fools
    Foot
    Football
    Forecast
    Forgive
    Forgiveness
    Forum
    Found
    Foundation
    Fracture
    Frankenstorm
    Freak
    Freakout
    Free
    Freedom
    Free Will
    Fret
    Friday
    Friend
    Friends
    Frustrated
    Frustration
    Fun
    Fundamentals
    Funeral
    Future
    Galaxy
    Galley
    Gamecocks
    Games
    Generation
    Generation X
    Genre
    Genuine
    Geology
    Georgia
    Gift
    Gift Card
    Gifts
    Girl
    Girly
    Goal
    God
    Good
    Goodreads
    Google+
    Gossip
    Government
    Governor
    Grace
    Graduate
    Graduated
    Grammar
    Granddaddy
    Grandmother
    Grandparents
    Gratitude
    Graveyard
    Grief
    Grinch
    Grind
    Gripe
    Ground
    Group
    Grow
    Grunge
    Guide
    Guilty
    Gun Control
    Guns
    Habits
    Hair
    Halloween
    Happiness
    Happy
    Hard
    Hard Work
    Harry Potter
    Haukannah
    Haven
    Head
    Headache
    Heal
    Healing
    Health
    Hear
    Heart
    Heat
    Heaven
    Help
    Hero
    Hiatus
    Higher
    High School
    Hiking
    Hobbies
    Hobby
    Holiday
    Holidays
    Holy
    Holy Spirit
    Holy Week
    Home
    Homeland Security
    Honest
    Honesty
    Hope
    Horizon
    Horror
    Hospital
    Hot
    House
    Housecleaning
    Housework
    Human
    Humble
    Humility
    Hurt
    Hvac
    Hypocricy
    Hypocrite
    Hypocrites
    Ice
    Idea
    Ideas
    Identity
    Idjit
    Ignore
    Ill
    Illness
    Imitation
    Important
    Improve
    Incursion
    Independent
    Independent Author
    Indepent
    Individual
    Infection
    Information
    Injury
    Inner Circle
    Innovation
    Insane
    Insanity
    Inside
    Inspiration
    Inspirational
    Instructions
    Insurance
    Integrity
    Interest
    Internal
    Internet
    Intervention
    Interview
    Introduction
    Intuition
    Invitations
    Invite
    Ipad
    Ironic
    Iron Man 3
    Irritate
    Islam
    Issues
    Jack In The Box
    Jana Lanning
    January
    Jealous
    Jealousy
    Jerk
    Jesus
    Jesus Sacrificef62d61ad05
    Jewelry
    Jihad
    Job
    Joueney
    Journey
    Jovan
    Joy
    Joyful
    Jrrtolkeinee9d04cba9
    Judge
    Judgement
    Jupiter
    Keeper
    Kids
    Kill
    Kindle
    Kindness
    Know
    Knowledge
    Kvetch
    Labor Day
    Landmine
    Laptop
    Laundry
    Law
    Law Of Undulation
    Lazy
    Lead
    Leader
    Leadership
    Learn
    Learned
    Leave
    Legacy
    Legal
    Legislation
    Legislature
    Lent
    Lesson
    Lessons
    Letter
    Level
    Licensure
    Lie
    Life
    Lifestyle
    Light
    Limits
    List
    Listening
    Little
    Live
    Local
    Logic
    Lonely
    Look
    Lord
    Lose
    Loss
    Lost
    Love
    Luck
    Lull
    Lunch
    Lurkers
    Maccacare
    Mainstream
    Management
    Manhunt
    Manure
    Marriage
    Martin
    Maturity
    Me
    Mean
    Meaning
    Media
    Medication
    Medicine
    Mediocrity
    Meditation
    Meeting
    Memorial Day
    Memories
    Men
    Mental Health
    Mental Illness
    Mercies
    Mercy
    Merit
    Mess
    Miami
    Mid
    Middle
    Middle Age
    Middle Class
    Miliatary
    Mind
    Misc
    Miscellaneous
    Mischief
    Misconceptions
    Miserable
    Miss
    Mission
    Mistake
    Mistakes
    Mobile
    Mobile Devices
    Moderate
    Mom
    Money
    Mood
    Moral
    Morning
    Mother
    Motion
    Motivation
    Motivator
    Motive
    Move
    Movie
    Movies
    Mt Tabor04c6ab0850
    Mundane
    Muse
    Music
    Musings
    Must
    Myrtle Beach
    Mystery
    Nano
    Nanowrimo
    Nasty
    National Novel Writing Month
    Nature
    Necromancers
    Needs
    Needy
    Negative
    New
    News
    Newsletter
    Newspaper
    New Year
    Niche
    Nighmare
    Night
    Night Owl
    Noaa
    Noah
    Non Fiction
    Nonfiction6aa2962efc
    Nonstop To Nowhere
    Normal
    Notes
    Notice
    Novel
    Novella
    Novels
    Novelty
    Nurture
    Obama
    Obedience
    Observe
    Obsidian
    October
    Odd
    Office
    Oliver
    Ollie
    Online
    Opinion
    Opportunity
    Opposition
    Organize
    Original
    Overwhelmed
    Own
    Pagan
    Pain
    Pajamas
    Palmetto Beach
    Panic
    Paper
    Parable
    Paradigm
    Paradise
    Paradox
    Paragraph Planet
    Parallel
    Paralysis
    Park
    Parrots
    Party
    Passionate
    Past
    Pastor
    Paterno
    Patience
    Patient
    Patterns
    Pay
    Peace
    Peanuts
    Pedestals
    Penance
    Penn State
    People
    Perception
    Perfect
    Periphery
    Perseverence
    Persistence
    Person
    Personal
    Personality
    Perspective
    Pessimist
    Petty
    Phoenix
    Phone
    Picket
    Pink
    Pintrest
    Pita
    Pizza
    Places
    Plague
    Plane
    Plans
    Plant
    Plot
    Pm
    Poinsettia
    Point
    Polar-vortex
    Political
    Politicians
    Politics
    Popular
    Positive
    Post
    Potential
    Power
    Powerful
    Pray
    Prayer
    Prayers
    Preference
    Preferences
    Pregnancy
    Preparation
    Present
    Pressure
    Priorities
    Privacy
    Pro
    Problem
    Problems
    Process
    Productive
    Programs
    Progress
    Project
    Projection
    Projects
    Prologue
    Promotion
    Protect
    Proverbs
    Pruning
    Psychologist
    Psychology
    Publication
    Publicity
    Publish
    Published
    Publishing
    Pure
    Purpose
    Quality
    Quarantine
    Questions
    Quiet
    Quit
    Quotes
    Rachel
    Radar
    Radio
    Rain
    Random
    Rant
    Rave
    Reaction
    Read
    Readers
    Reading
    Real
    Reality
    Realization
    Realize
    Reap
    Reaper
    Reaping
    Rearview-mirror
    Reason
    Reboot
    Recipes
    Recover
    Red
    Reform
    Reformation Sunday
    Refresh
    Refreshing
    Regift
    Rehab
    Relationship
    Relationships
    Relax
    Release
    Relief
    Religious
    Remains
    Repair
    Reputation
    Rerun
    Research
    Resignation
    Resist
    Resistance
    Resolution
    Resolutions
    Resolve
    Resonance
    Respect
    Responsibilities
    Responsibility
    Rest
    Resurrection
    Retire
    Revelation
    Review
    Reward
    Rewrite
    Rewrites
    Rhythem
    Ride
    Right
    Rise
    Risk
    River
    Rock
    Romance
    Roses
    Routine
    Routines
    Royal
    Rude
    Rules
    Rut
    Sacred
    Sacrifice
    Sad
    Safe
    Sale
    Sales
    Salvation
    Sample
    Sample Chapter
    Sandusky
    Sandy Hook Elementary School
    San Francisco
    Sanity
    Santa
    Satan
    Satellite
    Save
    Saving
    Say
    Sc
    Scandal
    Scapegoat
    Scared
    Schedule
    School
    School Shooting
    Science
    Science Fiction
    Sci Fi
    Scifid764c6b008
    Scottsdale
    Scrooge
    Season
    Season Finale
    Seasons
    Secret
    Security
    Self
    Selfish
    Self Publish
    Selfpublishee5d5de0ab
    Senior
    Sense
    Sequel
    Series
    Service
    Setbacks
    Sex
    Shadow
    Shapeshifter
    Share
    Shatterpoint
    Shenanagins
    Shift
    Shifting
    Ship
    Shoe
    Shoes
    Shopping
    Short Stories
    Short Story
    Shovel
    Show
    Shull
    Sick
    Sidekick
    Sidekicks
    Signs
    Simplicity
    Sin
    Sincere
    Sinners
    Sins
    Sinus
    Sinus Infection
    Situations
    Sleep
    Slow
    Smallville
    Smart
    Smartphones
    Smashwords
    Sneeze
    Snow
    Social
    Social Media
    Society
    Socks
    Solitude
    Solution
    Solutions
    Sorry
    Soul
    South
    Sow
    Sowing
    Space
    Speak
    Spirit
    Spiritual
    Splinter
    Spouse
    Spring
    Square-pegs
    Stand
    Standards
    Start
    Star Trek
    Star Trek Into Darkness
    Star Wars
    State
    State Fair
    Stayathomeaa1b1506e7
    Stereotypes
    Stories
    Storm
    Story
    Strange
    Strategy
    Streaming
    Strength
    Stress
    Strong
    Struggle
    Stubborn
    Stuff
    Stupid
    Subcommittee
    Succeed
    Success
    Suffering
    Suggestion
    Suggestions
    Summer
    Sunglasses
    Sunny
    Sunrise
    Sunshine
    Superhero
    Superheros
    Supernatural
    Superstitions
    Support
    Surgery
    Surprise
    Surprises
    Survival
    Survive
    Surviving
    Suspension
    Symbols
    Tablet
    Tactics
    Talking
    Tanger Falls
    Tarnish
    Tax
    Technology
    Teenage
    Telephone
    Telephones
    Television
    Temptation
    Ten
    Tendinitis
    Tennessee
    Terms
    Terror
    Terrorism
    Terrorists
    Text
    Tgif
    Thank
    Thankfulness
    Thanks
    Thanksgiving
    The Americans
    The Clone Wars
    The Cw
    The Divine Comedy
    The-earthside-trilogy
    The Edible Bookshelf
    The Grand Canyon
    The Great Divorce
    The Great Divorse
    The Hobbit
    The Justice League
    The Other Bible
    Therapist
    Thermostat
    The Screwtape Letters
    The-secret
    The Secret Circle
    Things
    Think
    Thinking
    Thirties
    Thor
    Thorns
    Thought
    Thoughts
    Throwback
    Thunderstorm
    Thursday
    Time
    Time Job
    Time Management
    Timing
    Tips
    Tired
    Toshiba
    Toxic
    Tradition
    Traditional
    Traditions
    Tragedy
    Train
    Transfer
    Transition
    Travel
    Travelling
    Treadmill
    Trees
    Trends
    Trials
    Trickortreatd836e64753
    Trip
    Trolls
    Trouble
    Trust
    Truth
    Tunnel
    Turbulence
    Tv
    Tweet
    Twitter
    Type
    Typewriter
    Uga
    Understand
    Understanding
    Undone
    Undulation
    Unique
    Universe
    University
    University Of South Carolina
    Update
    Urban Fantasy
    Usc
    Vacation
    Vampires
    Variety
    Vet
    Veterans Daybee36ce99e
    Viagra
    Vice
    Vicious
    Victory
    Video
    Viligance
    Villian
    Viral
    Virtue
    Virus
    Visitation
    Vitamin
    Voice
    Voices
    Volunteer
    Vote
    Walk
    War
    Washington D.C.
    Wasp
    Watch
    Watches
    Way
    Weakness
    Weather
    Website
    Wedding
    Wednesday
    Weeds
    Week
    Weekend
    Weekends
    Weird
    Werewolves
    Westboro Church
    Whatever
    Whats Up Letterea131f7a0b
    Wheat
    Whine
    Whiskey Creek Press
    Wicked
    Will
    Win
    Wings
    Wings Epressf69f38ebd3
    Winter
    Winterize
    Wisdom
    Wistv3f6c806d83
    Wizard
    Woman
    Women
    Wonder
    Wonderful
    Woodland
    Woods
    Words
    Work
    Workaholic
    World
    Worry
    Worse
    Wrist
    Write
    Writers
    Writers Block
    Writers Block93d394f99e
    Writing
    Wrong
    Yard
    Year
    Years
    Yellow
    You
    Youth
    Youtube
    Zacchaeus
    Zack
    Zimmerman
    Zombie

    RSS Feed

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.