Who knows how it happened? Was it my adventures in writing? Was it my “summer of sci-fi” and “mystery winter” reading adventures? Was it too many Breaking Bad and Game of Thrones marathons? Or maybe my weekly fix on Arrow and Supernatural? Or maybe it was too few craft shows and too many trips to gun shows and the firing range? When did I lay down my yarn and needle to take up laptops, firearms, superheros, villains, and fantasy worlds?
I’ve never been what you would call a “proper lady.” My long hair, makeup, and pink obsession are probably the only signs of feminine in me. Still, I did find comfort in cross stitching and enjoyed it a lot. I’m frequently sad that it’s become lost in my new life, and hope that someday a season will come when I can fit writing and cross stitching back into my life on a regular basis again. I do still stitch occasionally, but I have to limit it to smaller projects and shorter periods of time due to the busy nature of my life. I’m lucky to find 2 hours in a single day to work on my writing, let alone a secondary hobby. And maybe that’s why I walked out of Michaels empty handed Monday. It’s not that nothing struck me as interesting, but rather that the voice of reason told me loud and clear that I didn’t have time for the things that did strike me. And it made me sad.
Therein lies hope, perhaps. That I was disappointed at my lack of time to engage in this hobby might indicate that all feminine within me isn’t dead yet. Something may remain alive yet, gasping for breath and hoping that I will fill it with some little bit of attention to keep it alive, just a bit longer. Maybe I need to reach for the craft bag instead of the laptop bag every now and then. Maybe, if I try a bit harder, I can find a place to allow this to grow. Or to at least not fall completely dormant.
What’s not weak cannot die. But then again, the fact that my interest in cross stitching is pricking me may indicate that it’s not as weak as I originally thought. There might be some hope left for me yet.
We shall see. Yes, we shall see.
That’s all today. Take care, and have a great week.