Escape Reality
By SherritheWriter
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Loyalty?

5/14/2014

 
Today, I’d like to talk about the much acclaimed scene from the latest episode of Game of Throne, where Tyrion Lannister spoke in at his murder trial for King Joffrey. If you haven’t seen it, the video is below. I’m not here to discuss the excellent acting, through – I’m here to talk about the power of this scene, and how it applies to reality.

He saved the city from an attack at the end of Season 2. Not only did he never get credit for it, but now they want to execute him. How many of you  can relate to Tyrion? Not in the sense of being accused of murder (for the second time, and being set up, for the second time), but in the sense of you tried to help people, and they turned on you? You saved their skin, and all too soon the thanks was forgotten and  the minute it was convenient, they turned now you’re the bad guy. People don’t care where they lay blame, as long as it’s not on themselves. They’ll betray anybody. Here we see one of the most unflattering traits of humanity. Let them find someone that they believe serves their interests better, and they forget all you’ve done and cast you off. You can burn for all they care. They found something better.

It’s one thing human beings have in common with the devil. 

I know you don’t like that, but it’s absolutely true. People can be jackasses, plain and simple. Pride is the sin that led to the fall, and pride is the thing that keeps tripping us up, over and over. Memory is short for blessings and long on offenses. The Game of Thrones isn’t just fiction; it’s reality. People play the “world” game to win every day, and the players don’t care who they use, step on, or hurt in the process. “It’s not personal” is a favorite saying, but the truth is that it turns all too personal when somebody else turns the game on them. Whether it’s position, power, or money they play for, then you better know that you can count on no loyalty from them. Anything other than God’s will and purpose is the wrong answer. If they don’t abide by this, then people are nothing more than tools to them. Once they’re done with you, they’re done with you.

It’s no wonder so many people are walking around with two ton chips on their shoulder. Between playing the game and being played for the game, it can make you cynical. There are a lot of angry people in the world, and they tend to either build a wall to isolate themselves from being hurt, or they lash out and hurt you before you can hurt them.

Neither way is right. The right answer is the one Tyrion came up with: let God decide. Of course, in our case, the trial isn’t by physical combat. It’s spiritual combat. And in a way, that’s the harder route to take. Patience doesn’t come easy, especially when people are trying to make you a victim and break you with circumstances. But you have to remember one absolute truth that can never be denied, and it’s a truth that I’ve come to discover that most people either don’t know or don’t comprehend: when you curse others, you really curse yourself. Truth always makes itself known, and it’s usually at a time and place where it’s mighty inconvenient to those trying to hide it. The Bible calls it reaping and sowing in Galatians 6, but nobody had to tell me this. I opened my eyes, took a look around, and saw it for myself. Without fail, I see people that accuse others or put others in bad situations wind out accused and in bad situations themselves. It’s the only thing in life I’ve seen with a 100% hit rate. It’s enough to keep me straight, because life is hard enough without creating more drama or problems.

There are two points to this entry, and to what you can learn from this scene. First, people are fickle. Popularity doesn’t last, nor does praise or favor. It’s a poor foundation to lay yourself on, because it will fail you. Somebody else always comes along that people like better, so it’s best to roll with what is and not take it to heart (the good or the bad). The people in your inner circle aren’t perfect, but they have a way of proving themselves when it matters most, so look to that. True character shows when the crap hits the fan, not when you’re on top of the world. People that stand by you when everybody else turns are like diamonds – rare, precious, and worth holding on to because they stand and shine when everything else breaks under darkness. Second, anger isn’t the answer. Lashing out only makes you bitter, and people just call you a jerk and go on their merry way, and building walls only isolates you from things that could be great blessings that build you up to a greater purpose. Don’t let the devil win by giving in to his nature. Root yourself in what’s right and trust that truth will prevail, and the curses people are sowing on you will be brought under submission by an authority that can’t be bribed, cheated, or cajoled into wrong. No, it isn’t easy, but the right way rarely is. The ultimate authority is untouchable and can be trusted far more than any man on this earth, or the demons riding them around. You may or may not see your reward in this world, but it will come, and you have to be ok with taking things on credit sometimes.

The game of wordly success is never ultimately won. Somewhere, somehow, sometime, the price is always paid; and it’s usually catastrophic.

You may think I see too much into this, but remember: fiction does mirror reality, sometimes in uncomfortable ways. Think about it. Writer’s do this all the time. Where, exactly, do you think our stories come from?

That’s all today. Take care, and have a great rest of the week.

Bye!

Habits

1/31/2014

 
I recently started reading Making Good Habits – Breaking Bad Habits, by Joyce Meyer, and one chapter in a line already got me thinking. She wrote “most of what we do on a daily basis is habit.” It reminded me of something somebody said in a seminar several years ago along these same lines. She said, “you don’t realize how many of our emotional reactions are actually habits. We subconsciously remember how we reacted the last time something similar happened, and jump right back to it. The way to gain control is to stop for a moment and ask yourself ‘why do I feel this way?’ You’d be amazed at how much more productive you are when you get a handle on your emotions.”

Both this line and the memory of that seminar got me to thinking. It’s easy to see how some things are habits. My Bible reading is a habit. Prayer time is a habit. Listening to my weather radio while I get dressed is a habit. The times we eat lunch and supper are habits. Chores and errands are habits. Even many of the things I do with my writing and promoting it are habits. All of these were formed, on purpose, based on what works. But how many other habits are part of my daily life that might not be so effective? Are there things I do that may be holding me back? Or other ways that would be more productive, if I made a simple change?

I’ve often said that changing how you think about things is the hardest thing to do, and now I realize why. It requires a tremendous effort to pay attention to things we normally don’t notice and take control of it to form new habits!  And often, people get frustrated in the process and just give up, thinking it’s not worth it – or worse yet, “if people love me, they will accept me as I am and get over it.”

And the devil absolutely loves that attitude, because he knows that the constant cycle of frustration/fight/forgiveness is slowly chipping away at your relationships, and the process gets slower every time you take another round. The truth is, it does matter, and it has a bigger impact on your relationships than you think. Even small things can chip away at something good until all that’s left are the crumbs of broken trust and resentment that overshadow any good sentiment that once held the dust together.

It’s been four years since I underwent my major mental overhaul (thanks to a major life overhaul), and I can tell you that my biggest struggle was accepting things as they are, and not as I want them to be. I still struggle with that from time to time, most recently with my parakeet’s nerve injury. I hate to see Ollie hurt, and was under a tremendous amount of anxiety and stress over it. Nothing I did seemed to help and I was so aggravated! You know what changed that? Getting the flu. I was literally too sick to worry all the time. But a surprising thing happened. I found that, when I quit hovering over Ollie all the time and peeping on him every few minutes, he improved drastically. He’s not healed, and these cold days knock him down more than I like, but I quickly saw that when I accepted him in the condition he’s in now – and not the condition he was in six months ago, which I want him to return to – he did better. He started eating more. He started chirping and singing every now and then. He seemed to relax and accept his own healing as I relaxed and accepted it. He even gets spunky and sassy every now and then. I see his personality coming back. But it didn’t happen until I backed off, trusted the Lord to heal Ollie, and let it go.

If changing my behavior can impact a parakeet, imagine how it can impact other people.

It’s something worth thinking about. I know I have been. Yes, people should accept you as you are, but don’t you want to do your part to make your relationships the best they can be? How much better can your relationships be if you replace nagging with trusting? Complaining with compromising? Threats with respect? Or better yet, accepting people and things as they are and working with them instead of demanding that “they change or else?” Ah, that’s one to really be cautious of. When threats start, “or else” is often the more attractive offer.

Consider the parakeet. If it can improve through changes in human behavior, isn’t it worth a try? I mentioned two entries ago how negative energy drives people away. That too is a habit. And I think that if you really want to be happy, if you really want your relationships to be the best they can be, if you really want your life to be the best it can be, then you’ll agree that it’s worth breaking bad habits of thought, emotion, and behavior to bring it about. It takes work, and it takes time. But , as Meyer says, if you’re determined to make a positive change and focus on what you hope to gain instead of what hurts, then you can do it.

And again, more support to what I said two entries ago: change your mind, change your life. Or, as the Book of Proverbs says, "as a man thinks in his heart, so he is."

It’s worth thinking about. I’m happy with my life, but I believe it’s because I’m always looking for ways to make things better. Learning is a lifelong process, after all. And it’s a process I’m committed to.

That’s all today. Have a Happy Friday and a great weekend.

Bye!

And Yet ...

12/9/2013

 
Picture
... yesterday's entry reminds me to take a look in the mirror, and to be mindful of how my own behavior could contribute to how others act. Because I know I have my own moments when I'm not at my best. I get stressed, and frustrated, and lose my temper. That doesn't exactly help others to be at their best.

The truth is, I'm just like everybody else out there. I'm stressed. My schedule is chaotic. People are clingy that need to back off; people that need to hang around disappear; people that are supposed to be giving direction and guidance give the run around - we can't seem to get it right. It's misfires, miscommunications, and misunderstandings all around. Everybody has too much to do and too little time. I'm no better than the rest.

And yet, I want to do better myself. I want to handle things better. I want to be more patient, and understanding, and to handle the natural increases that come with the holiday season with more grace and fortitude than I have in the past. So what's the answer? How do you break the pattern?

I picked up one of my C.S. Lewis books a few minutes ago, and read something that might be helpful. It said that when we say The Lord's Prayer, our addressing God as "our Father" is "dressing up as Christ." We're called to be more Christlike, so the way we're advised to achieve that is to get in the role - even though our faults and fobilies make us woefully inadequate to even dare to step into this role - so we can learn to rise to it. We're commanded to act the part. This isn't "fake it till you make it" mentality, but rather, stretching ourselves to achieve above and beyond our current capacity so we can rise to a higher level, as the Lord helps and guides us.

So, if I want to be more patient when things are hectic, then I need to take a deep breath and act like I'm still holding it together, even if I really feel like smashing the telephone with a hammer if it rings ONE MORE TIME. It means continuing to ask relevant questions when people are giving me the run around to encourage them to open up, instead of telling them to get their crap together. It means encouraging people to find their gifts and to use them to become more independent instead of telling them to quit being a clingy pain in the rear. It means engaging in "prayer without ceasing," which means to lift up my burdens instead of trying to plow them through my own.

I said yesterday that I found people could match me "attitude for attitude" when I called them on their wrongs. Obviously, that wasn't a good approach. Maybe this is a better way. So instead of driving like maniacs, losing our cool, honking horns, and popping off, why don't we try a better way? Why don't we take Lewis' advice and act like the better people we want to be? Really, why wait until January 1st to make new beginnings? The Lord's mercies are new every morning, and every day is a chance to start again. Let's start right, now, by acting like the people we want Santa Clause to believe we are ;)

Oh no, I'm not innocent. But I don't want to be guilty any more, either. I'm trying to do better; I really am. And there's no reason why we can't all do better this holiday season, with the Lord's help.

That's all today. Next entry, I'll pass along some fun, inexpensive gift ideas.

Bye!

    Escape Reality

    By day, I'm a program assistant. By night, I'm an independent author. My fiction offers an escape from the reality of day-to-day life. See how my experiences lead to creating new worlds! 

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