Today, I’d like to talk about the much acclaimed scene from the latest episode of Game of Throne, where Tyrion Lannister spoke in at his murder trial for King Joffrey. If you haven’t seen it, the video is below. I’m not here to discuss the excellent acting, through – I’m here to talk about the power of this scene, and how it applies to reality.

He saved the city from an attack at the end of Season 2. Not only did he never get credit for it, but now they want to execute him. How many of you  can relate to Tyrion? Not in the sense of being accused of murder (for the second time, and being set up, for the second time), but in the sense of you tried to help people, and they turned on you? You saved their skin, and all too soon the thanks was forgotten and  the minute it was convenient, they turned now you’re the bad guy. People don’t care where they lay blame, as long as it’s not on themselves. They’ll betray anybody. Here we see one of the most unflattering traits of humanity. Let them find someone that they believe serves their interests better, and they forget all you’ve done and cast you off. You can burn for all they care. They found something better.

It’s one thing human beings have in common with the devil. 

I know you don’t like that, but it’s absolutely true. People can be jackasses, plain and simple. Pride is the sin that led to the fall, and pride is the thing that keeps tripping us up, over and over. Memory is short for blessings and long on offenses. The Game of Thrones isn’t just fiction; it’s reality. People play the “world” game to win every day, and the players don’t care who they use, step on, or hurt in the process. “It’s not personal” is a favorite saying, but the truth is that it turns all too personal when somebody else turns the game on them. Whether it’s position, power, or money they play for, then you better know that you can count on no loyalty from them. Anything other than God’s will and purpose is the wrong answer. If they don’t abide by this, then people are nothing more than tools to them. Once they’re done with you, they’re done with you.

It’s no wonder so many people are walking around with two ton chips on their shoulder. Between playing the game and being played for the game, it can make you cynical. There are a lot of angry people in the world, and they tend to either build a wall to isolate themselves from being hurt, or they lash out and hurt you before you can hurt them.

Neither way is right. The right answer is the one Tyrion came up with: let God decide. Of course, in our case, the trial isn’t by physical combat. It’s spiritual combat. And in a way, that’s the harder route to take. Patience doesn’t come easy, especially when people are trying to make you a victim and break you with circumstances. But you have to remember one absolute truth that can never be denied, and it’s a truth that I’ve come to discover that most people either don’t know or don’t comprehend: when you curse others, you really curse yourself. Truth always makes itself known, and it’s usually at a time and place where it’s mighty inconvenient to those trying to hide it. The Bible calls it reaping and sowing in Galatians 6, but nobody had to tell me this. I opened my eyes, took a look around, and saw it for myself. Without fail, I see people that accuse others or put others in bad situations wind out accused and in bad situations themselves. It’s the only thing in life I’ve seen with a 100% hit rate. It’s enough to keep me straight, because life is hard enough without creating more drama or problems.

There are two points to this entry, and to what you can learn from this scene. First, people are fickle. Popularity doesn’t last, nor does praise or favor. It’s a poor foundation to lay yourself on, because it will fail you. Somebody else always comes along that people like better, so it’s best to roll with what is and not take it to heart (the good or the bad). The people in your inner circle aren’t perfect, but they have a way of proving themselves when it matters most, so look to that. True character shows when the crap hits the fan, not when you’re on top of the world. People that stand by you when everybody else turns are like diamonds – rare, precious, and worth holding on to because they stand and shine when everything else breaks under darkness. Second, anger isn’t the answer. Lashing out only makes you bitter, and people just call you a jerk and go on their merry way, and building walls only isolates you from things that could be great blessings that build you up to a greater purpose. Don’t let the devil win by giving in to his nature. Root yourself in what’s right and trust that truth will prevail, and the curses people are sowing on you will be brought under submission by an authority that can’t be bribed, cheated, or cajoled into wrong. No, it isn’t easy, but the right way rarely is. The ultimate authority is untouchable and can be trusted far more than any man on this earth, or the demons riding them around. You may or may not see your reward in this world, but it will come, and you have to be ok with taking things on credit sometimes.

The game of wordly success is never ultimately won. Somewhere, somehow, sometime, the price is always paid; and it’s usually catastrophic.

You may think I see too much into this, but remember: fiction does mirror reality, sometimes in uncomfortable ways. Think about it. Writer’s do this all the time. Where, exactly, do you think our stories come from?

That’s all today. Take care, and have a great rest of the week.

Bye!

And I say let it die. The more agonizing it's demise, the better. I know a lot of people had a magnificent year, and for them I'm happy, but for me it was a bag full of crap. I shall escort this year out with my foot, if necessary. Come midnight, it WILL leave.

But before that, let me pause to wish our male sun conure, Zacchaeus (Zack), a very happy birthday! Our little sunshine is 14 today! And before the obligatory "good Lord!" flies, conures can live up to 30 years. So this little ball of energy isn't even middle aged yet, and he doesn't feel (or act) a day over 2. Happy birthday, sunshine! We love you!

Of course, Zack's birthday is New Year's Eve, which is a day people typically think about the year past and resolve on how to do better next year. This is something I've been considering for a while. You know 2013 was a tough year for me if you've been following this blog, and yesterday's Facebook post that the anger and depression circling me has to go is probably no surprise to most of you. But the question remains, how did it get to be this way? And to discover that, I have to take a look in the mirror and consider two things: what did I do wrong to backslide, and what have I done right that I can build on?

I think the cause is simple: there was a lot of change in 2013, and I was overwhelmed by it. I just didn't realize it at the time. I had the attitude that "I've faced worse, so this is nothing," but that wasn't necessarily true. I wasn't honest with myself or with others. Honestly, I was as scared as everybody else by everything shifting around me. I put on a brave face, but perhaps, I should have sat down for a moment and considered that, no matter what I've seen and what I've experienced (whether better or worse), I really wasn't as boldly confident in facing things as I acted. In other words, I underestimated myself. So one lesson learned in 2013: you can slay the dragon, and still die from a wasp sting, so to speak. Facing down bit monsters and getting around huge mountains doesn't guarantee that you've got the smaller stuff whipped. In fact, you may still be reeling from those big battles so much that you don't have as much left in you to face them the way you faced things last time. So there was the pitfall. I was too confident and not honest with myself. lesson learned.

As for the anger and depression thing, well, with change around every corner it's natural to wonder "how's life going to punch me in the stomach today?" but I don't have to accept that. I don't have to be a victim of circumstance, or of other peoples' decisions. I need to get back to slowing down and really looking at things and situations to mine the opportunity out of it. I haven't done that, and because of it I've become fearful and my outlook on the future has been downcast. I don't want to be that way. So I need to get back on track, to thoughtfully act with wisdom and consideration instead of reacting, and I believe that will help my overall outlook. I know you can't help everything that happens to you. In fact, there's a great deal you have no control over. But you can take your time to evaluate things and consider the best course of action. I haven't been doing that, and I need to get back to it. I'm not going to allow life to kick me in the rear anymore. Everybody else has been doing what's best for them, and I have a right to do the same. And so I shall.

The anger thing has been resolving itself over the past few months. It's been a journey, and not flattering in places, but I do see now that all that's happened and all people have done has wound out for the best. Things take time to settle and once again, my frustration in the tidal wave of change caused me to slip in discernment here and there. I'm sorry for that and while it might be too late in some circumstances to make things better and to admit to gaining perspective, well, I can say here that I was too hasty in some of my words here and there and I do realize now that it was all for the best. I also realize that discernment is always the way of wisdom. So I brush myself off, get back up, and resolve to learn from those mistakes and to more thoughtfully consider words, actions, and reactions to questions or inquiries  in the future. I tried, there were some places where I failed, so I have to face it, learn from it, and move on.

It seems that the key to a better 2014 (and beyond) is to:

Be honest with myself, and

Take time to prayerfully and thoughtfully consider all things, big and small.

Yes, I brought a great deal of this on, but that doesn't mean that I have to stay down. I underestimated myself, my reactions, and my emotions this year. I slipped, thinking that I had defeated bigger things and let smaller things undermine me. Lesson learned. I shall be more prayerful, diligent, and thoughtful from now on. And I don't have to wait for the fireworks to go off at midnight to start it, either. I can do it right now. I've come too far to fail now, and I need to renew my commitment to protecting and building on the blessings I've worked so hard for.

So all in all, that's my resolution for 2014: to do better. It might sound vague when you boil it all down to basics, but it covers a big journey through 2013 and what I hope to take forward from it. And no doubt, that journey will show when I start writing the sequel to Move in the next month or so. In fact, it's a large part of what's inspired me to go back to that story and do more with it. Stay tuned for progress on that one. I'm excited about that journey!

Happy New Year to you. Stay safe, and enjoy it.

Bye!

Hi all; I thought I'd give you a general update on what's happening in my corner of the world.

First, Splinter is coming out next week! I'm excited, of course, and will update you with buy links for the book as soon as they're available. It's only going to be available in ebook format. Lots of people ask me why, and the reason is that I have to pay to make it available in paperback, and frankly I never recup the costs of it. Almost all of my books sales are ebooks and the paperbacks just don't move, so I invest that money in promotion of the electronic version instead. If you'd like a sneak peek at Splinter, you can check out the short story I posted on ReadWave yesterday titled "Fractured". It's told from the point of view of Amelia Eaton, the doctor on Jovan I and Leigh Lybrand's best friend, and it gives a great setup to the novel because it hints at something important that happens about 18 months before Splinter opens. Go check it out - the story is only 800 words, and you can read it in less than 5 minutes.

If you were on social media Thursday, then you know my car broke down when I went out to lunch that day. What a story! I actually went out to pick up a Christmas gift I ordered for Rick. They tried to deliver it to the house, but unbeknownst to me, they sent it with a signature required, so when it arrived Wednesday and I wasn't there, they left a nice little card in the mailbox. So I already had to explain to Rick why the post office was trying to deliver a parcel to me, because he gets home before I do. I had to go to the post office Thursday to pick it up, or they were going to return it to the sender, which I didn't want, of course. I made it all the way to the post office (I didn't realize how far out in the boondocks the post office serving our zip code was!) and the car started smoking when I pulled back in the parking lot at work. I went in to tell my co-workers what was happening, and took it straight to a mechanic that set up shop about 2/10 of a mile from my house. The car started overheating on that ride, and I had to stop twice to rest the engine before it shut off. (Thank goodness my office is only about 3 miles from home). But thanks be to God, I made it. I walked home carrying my purse, work bag, and Rick's gift (which was bigger than I expected, but thank goodness not heavy). And also thankfully, nobody saw me walking  home, as it's a dirt road with little traffic from my house to that mechanic. It turns out that a valve in my radiator had a hole in it, and all of the antifreeze leaked out. They fixed it the same day, which was amazing, and I picked it up before work yesterday (they wanted it to sit overnight to make sure it didn't leak any more antifreeze). The car's doing fine now, but it relieved me of $281. To replace a $8 part, I might add.

Speaking of Rick, he did recover from the tissue infection in his cheek. It was a painful ordeal, and we're glad it's over. We still aren't sure how he got it. I surmise it has something to do with working in a middle school and handling all of those student and teacher iPads. People can be pretty nasty sometimes. We actually had a good weekend last weekend, because he felt better and we had a chance to have a "date day" for the first time in about a month. We went to the gun show, out to lunch, and to see Thor: The Dark World. We enjoyed it and it was great to have a chance to go out and do something fun together. But now he's down again, because he got a flu shot yesterday, and it has him feeling run down today. He hasn't had a flu shot in a few years, and it seems to have knocked him out this time. He can't seem to win. This should pass by tomorrow or Monday according to the paperwork they gave him.

Ollie is over his kidney infection, but it left him with nerve inflammation in his leg. Some days are better than others. I've bugged the vet about it several time and even took Ollie back because of it. The vet said it will get better in time, but inflammation takes a while to go down, and little Ollie seems to be a slow healer. Some days are better than others. I hate it because I can tell the leg is really bothering him sometimes. But he still sings, and plays, and he's eating very well. The vet said to try to get him to work that leg - a kind of "physical therapy" - and we're trying but again, some days are better than others. We all know that the changing weather isn't helping matters either, because I can tell it bugs him more when it's cold. Poor little fellow.

Christmas shopping is 80% done. I  know I won't finish before Thanksgiving, but that's okay because I think I can finish in early December with this rate of progress. I have to, because the workload at my job peaks in December. Along with a December 16th exam deadline, we also have everybody wanting to get licensed before the end of the year so they can start on projects at the beginning of the new year. It's insanity, and I've learned that I have to plan ahead to handle "the crush" if I want to keep from drowning. It can get overwhelming, between a heavy workload and your family and social life picking up for the holidays. Why every place I've worked seems to hit a "crunch time" between Thanksgiving and Christmas is beyond me - I guess it must be a trend no matter where you work. Things just get more active all around during the holidays. But thank God, I hope that planning ahead will keep me sane. I was so stressed and overwhelmed last holiday season that I was miserable and couldn't enjoy the holidays even when I was finally away from all the madness. I just couldn't seem to "wind down" from everything pounding on me, and I don't ever want to be in that place again. I'll err on the side of wisdom and take people snickering and calling me "anal" if it means I can keep an even keel once it all busts loose in a few weeks and actually be able to enjoy the season like we're supposed to.

And that reminds me to give you a follow up that I should have done a while ago. I know I said in July that I was having problems with being angry all the time and at so many people and situations because of the crazy amount of change since last  December. I wanted to let you know that I am feeling better and I think I'm making progress in this area. It's not easy to deal with anger. Of course, you have every right to be angry when people are making decisions that you have to pay the price for, but that doesn't give you justification to stay angry. That's putting yourself in a prison and, as I said in July, that's not the kind of person I want to be. I see now that sometimes people just make bad decisions, and whatever consequences you suffer for it, they suffer much more because they're in the middle of it. Periphery problems, as I was struggling with at the time, pass much faster than being in the dead center of the chaos. But another issue is that I also realize that I'm not the only one that was overwhelmed. Many people were, and some still are, but everybody is trying to get settled in a better place. I see intent to make progress and it's paid off in some ways already, so I'm content to hang in there and keep things moving in a right direction. Forgiveness is one of the hardest things we're called to do, but it's possible through prayer. Moving on can be hard too, but again it's possible if you're willing to learn from the past and gain wisdom from all that you experience. I have heard that  more change may be on the way for me in the new year, and that's okay as well. I see some benefits to it and while I realize that a learning curve and adjustments might be on the horizon (again), I prayed over it and feel this is for ultimate good for me and many others. Nothing is definite, but I'll pass along more if and when it comes to pass.

I think the greatest thing I've come to learn over these past months as I worked through the anger issue is that I had an error in my own perception. I was in a rut for so many years at my old workplace, that I thought the "normal" state of being was just that - being in a groove. But that's not right. I've come to see that the constant change and state of flux I've seen over the past 3 years is actually the norm, and that 6 year rut was the exception. I've been working so long and hard to "get settled down," and now I realize that the proper state of life is actually change and constant motion. "Normal" is constant work and striving toward something better, to making the next steps and to moving ahead, not settling in a groove of the "same old same old" that slowly kills your soul. The happiness I thought I had in those days was nothing more than comfort of routine and fear of change, and I really had to be jolted to get out of that deceptive trap. Although I wouldn't relive that adjustment phase again for any amount of money or reward, I will say that I'm glad it happened, because my life is in a much better place, and the happiness I have now is based not on "comfort," but on faith and gratitude for a life that I finally realize is filled to overflowing with blessings. I had it backwards, and that's been part of my anger and adjustment problems to this big life change since 2010. That was a major revelation to me, and it helped me to start making steps in a positive direction in my own attitude and expectations of life.

So am I still going through with the big life evaluation and purge I planned for January 1? It doesn't look like I need to. I see where things fit now, and I also see the progress and change on the horizon that I was  hoping for.

Well, I think that's quite enough for one day. I hope you're all doing well. Take care, and have a great weekend.

Bye!

Or perhaps there's a better way to behead the serpent of anger in my situation, and it can be for once and for all. And perhaps this way doesn't require making quite the mess I anticipated. Rather, it's completely civilized, but people will still squawk. I'll tell you what it is, then I'll tell you why they'll squawk, then how it all ties together.

Exhaustion got the better of me today, so I took the day off to rest and frankly, to think over my life. In pondering why I'm so angry, the final answer came to me, and when it did it was so simple that I was surprised it took this long to hit me. I've spent the last 3+ years changing my life and proving myself to people: proving that I can rise to this new life, proving that I'm trustworthy, proving my worth. But in this "epidemic of quitting" that's been going on the past few months, a realization has slowly been creeping up on me, so slowly that the fundamental question at the core of my anger just hit me over the weekend today.

How many of them have proved themselves to me?

Cue crickets chirping *here*

That's right, very few. Far fewer than have set this sky-high bar they expect me to clear, each and every day. Far more than come in my life wanting things. Far fewer than actually take a second to say "thank you" for my efforts.

I think it's perfectly fair for me to be frustrated and to set my heels and say NO, I will not do any more until YOU demonstrate to ME why I should trust you. I know what you want out of me, but what are you willing to offer that will enrich my life? I see what you get out of me "rising to it," but what do I get out of it? Are you supporting me as I support you? What will I get out of giving you MY all? Do you care about me as a person and my physical, emotional and spiritual well being as much as you care about the feelings you're trying to hold me hostage to? You demand a place in my life - okay, my life is changed. Now what are YOU going to do to show me why you DESERVE this place?

I think makes sense. There are a lot of demands on me and there's no use for me to bust myself up meeting them if there's nothing in it for the greater good. If it's about nothing but serving one person's selfish needs, then it's a waste of time. And the truth is, there are people online that know me better than people that see me every day. There are people across the country - and even across the world! - that are reading and commenting on my writing, and the person slinking up to me whining or demanding my help has never taken 5 minutes to read one of my short stories.

Well, it's time to prioritize my life. Trust is something that has to be earned, and I'm giving people until the end of the year to demonstrate to me why I should maintain the status quo. Why should I keep doing what I'm doing? Give me a reason. Show me why I can trust you and how you're committed to helping me or working together toward a common goal. Remind me of why I agreed to all of these changes in the first place. My New Year's Resolution for 2014 is to clean up my life: to make changes that will prune out what's not producing fruit in my life, and to feed what is. I'm at the stage of my life where time is the most precious commodity that I have, and I simply can't waste it on fruitless endeavors, or things or people that don't give a crap about anybody but themselves. I'm flushing the demon of selfishness out of my life. Nobody's got time for that, and I won't tolerate it any more.

Of course, there are some people that have always been true and trustworthy, and they have nothing to worry about. Nobody online has anything to worry about. This isn't about you. This is about improving my day to day reality and taking stock of what really and truly matters. If my trust is confirmed, then you have nothing to worry about. I will commit to working with you to overcome the things that present potential stumbling blocks on my end. I'll work on my distaste for travel, for starters, and being a harda**, and I have great hopes that the process itself will take me a long way in working through anger issues. But I need a reason. I've proven myself. Now prove yourself. It's not rocket science. Asking for 5 months of observable, consistent behavior to substantiate my trust and your purpose in my life is perfectly fair.

Of course, people will squawk about this because people don't want to be treated fair - they wanted to be treated special. But that's exactly the point. Respect isn't a free gift; it's earned. Anybody that wants a "special" place in a persons' life has to demonstrate it by being there for them in the tough times. Well, this is a golden opportunity to get in my "inner circle." If you're there for me over the coming months while I strive to work through my anger and the confusion it's causing, then you will have earned my trust. And believe me, I'm fierce about defending my friends. My inner circle isn't big, but if you're in then you have an ally that prays for you every day and will stand by you and fight for you to the end. But you have to get there, first. Now's your chance. It's a golden opportunity. It will be interesting to see who takes advantage of it.
 
I would like to thank you online friends and social media followers for hanging in there with me. I know that posting angry blogs and social media updates isn't generally recommended and that you get sick of it, but this blog is also about to be how the reality of my life feeds my writing. I feel I owe it to you to be honest because nobody wants to read sterilized posts, nor do they believe them. Hey, it takes some fire to keep things cooking, right? So far, this whirlwind that's been my life has had a huge impact on my writing. I think anybody will agree that my writing took a darker turn after Anywhere But Here, because that's when all of these changes started happening. I started to see a whole other dimension of reality, and it wasn't always pretty. But Splinter got a contract and people are buying and reading Move, so I know I'm not alone in feelings of anger and confusion over life just being, well, life. There must be others out there struggling with anger and confusion issues - especially given the amount of messages and reviews that describe how they can relate to the struggles my characters face. We all go through seasons of anger and confusion. I hope that, by reflecting it through my writing and telling the "story behind the story" in this blog, it helps others to bridge the gap in their own lives; to find the resolution so they can work things out and get back to a balance of peace and joy in everyday living. But thanks, to all of you online, for being there and your help and encouragement through various stages of this. Rest assured that  this is about my day to day "reality" and in no way, shape or form is reflective of anything that's been said or posted on the Internet. I just hope that you find some help and encouragement for your own journey, or at least understand that my writing has rough edges because I have rough edges. I have flaws and right now, my big flaw is dealing with anger issues. I know it and thank you for being there while I work through it.

I will try. I will give working through this anger my very best shot and I won't quit because I'm sick of it and I don't want to be defeated. I want to be a whole person again, and I'm ready to start the process. But I need the people around me to do their part as well. This isn't a gauntlet being thrown down. It's a better way because I take responsibility for my part and give everybody else an opportunity to clarify their part, which I really do need right now. So bring me to life, folks, and in return you will get the best that I can offer. Because that's my policy: to do and give my best at all I lay my hand to. And now, since I announce this in a public, online forum, nobody has an excuse to say "I didn't know!" It's on the frigging World Wide Web. Anybody that really wants to know me doesn't have to look far to find me. Let's see who's seeking. Let's see who's listening. Let's see who's up to the challenge of demonstrating why rising to this higher ground benefits us all.

This isn't an easy journey, but I'm taking it. Now show me why it's worth it.

That's all today.

Bye!

Check out the awesome new cover for Move, courtesy of the brilliant artwork of Tatina Villa. I absolutely love it and highly recommend her to indie authors for their book covers. She's great to work with, she works fast, and her prices are very good! You can check out more of her great cover designs at Vila Designs. I found her on the Smashwords recommended list and I highly recommend her too!

Not only that, but I enrolled Move in the Smashwords Summer/Winter promotion. If you buy it there during the month of July, you can get it for half off - that's $1.50! Just go to Smashwords and enter coupon code SSW50 by midnight on July 31 to take advantage of the promotion. And best of all, you can download it in any ebook format there. So there's no excuse because you can get it for any ereader or computer.

It's some good news this week. I also made some much needed revisions to "Home" this week and have posted it to my writing portfolio at Writing.com .

So, of you've followed me on social media then you know another person in my work section resigned yesterday. I don't want any of you to misunderstand my frustration with this situation. I certainly understand that people have to do what they have to do to make their lives better. I would never blame anybody for taking advantage of an opportunity. My frustration comes from two places: First, after being totally and completely displaced three years ago when my job moved, some of the whining I hear over changes sounds like the girl that complained to me about having sinus drainage after I had just recovered from a stomach infection. A runny nose sounds whimpy when you've been on 3,000 milligrams of antibiotics for three weeks, and are in the  middle of six weeks of treatment for the internal damage and inflammation the infection left behind. And frankly, some staffing rearrangements and reinterpretations of policies and procedures barely register a blip on my personal radar. But it's pulled the rug out from under some people. Good thing they weren't me three years ago. That was the Hammer of Thor smashing my life to smithereens. What would they have done?

So it's perspective. I see things very differently because of my experiences, and I'm sure my boldness also makes me more likely to stand (and respect those who do rise to it) more than those that take the exit route. But then again, there are also times when it's the better part of wisdom to walk away gracefully and stop fighting a hopeless battle. Who's to say what's right? Well, this is where the other part of the frustration comes in.

You are responsible for doing whatever's necessary to make your life better, but you also have to acknowledge an uncomfortable fact: if you make a major life change that forces other people to make changes to their own life that they didn't plan on, they're going to get pissed off. It's not jealousy, as some  people accuse. It's justifiable anger at having their life changed by a decision made by another person. And frankly, it's not a battle you can win. This is a situation where it's 100% impossible to make all of the people happy. You aren't, and you have to live with the fact that some people are going to be mad at you for what you leave behind for them to deal with. What's more, they have a right to be mad. It's a natural response and it's best to let it play out. It's just one of those things that everybody has to deal with on their own and move on the best they can.

I do have faith that things will work out and in fact, I feel very hopeful that we're on the recovery side of all the transition and chaos that's rocked us these past few months. I know I've said many times that I haven't come this far to quit, fail, or give up, and I see signs that others aren't either. I'm seeing strength emerge and courage in the face of uncertainty, and that's a great encouragement to me. Right now, I see the small glimmers of opportunity that, if properly handled, will lead to the great blessings of tomorrow.

We'll get there. Maybe not today, or tomorrow, or next week or even next month, but I see signs of progress. I'm straining to see it, but there's no doubt that it's there. And that's always a good thing. Let's keep our eyes open to those opportunities and we will reap in due season, if we do not lose faith.

That's all today. Have a great rest of the week.

Bye!

Folks, it’s amazing I’m alive. I stepped on a landmine recently. 
 
Yep, I sure did. I asked someone I know if they had spoken to a mutual acquaintance lately and was harshly accused of trying to pick a fight.  After some ranting and admonitions about “minding my own business” they revealed that no, they hadn’t spoken to the person. 

Well, pardon me.

How many times has that happened to you? You know what  I mean.  A memory trigger brings something to mind so you ask about it, only to be criticized for asking, or accused of being nosy, or being told to mind your own business. You didn’t  realize that you were drifting into sacred territory – after all, it hadn’t been a sensitive issue before – but something changed and you get cut down for not knowing what you haven’t been told. 
 
I know it does hurt. It’s downright rude and offensive. But in such situations, I think it’s important that we keep a valuable truth in mind: the harsh reactions are a protective mechanism. These reactions are as good as
renting a digital billboard saying “I have issues with this!” They think a harsh reaction will teach you to back off. They don’t realize that may work, but they’re also exposing a chink in their armor. I compare these attacks where there’s no threat to an allergic reaction: An innocent substance gets in your system but for some reason your body perceives it as a threat, so it reacts.


The truth is that we all have emotional issues that we hold close in order to protect ourselves. None of us are really an "open book" no matter how forthright and honest we are or strive to be. We all have things we keep in our innermost circle and don't invite others in. That's fine. There are certain things we should keep private. The problem is that some people stretch that inner circle to hold in more than others, oftentimes things that others don't have a problem sharing and even seek help and support in handling. How much we hold in is up to us, but we need to kill the correlation between the one thing that pricks us and the whole world being out to get us. Emotionally charged issues tend to cloud our judgement and scew our perspective to a point where we believe it really is all about us - and nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, most of the people in this world don't even know us, and a great number who do know us don't have an emotional investment in us. For all our trials and tribulations, we personally interact with a limited number of people at a time and believe it or not, most of them mean us  no harm. Some (gasp!) might actually want to help and support us, and our knee jerk reactions to scare people away from sacred territory may scare them away. When emotions run high, it would behoove us to realize that, in the words of the late, great C.S. Lewis, "sometimes an apple is just an apple." Believe it or not, there aren't double meanings or ulterior motives to everything under the sun. 

I think the best thing to do in these cases is to back off. We all tend to cut others off from very emotionally sensitive issues and if a person chooses to do that then it’s disrespectful to try to bully your way in. It’s a shame, especially when you want to help and support them. But if they choose to shut others out and suffer alone, well, it’s best to respect their wishes and let them. After all, you can’t force people to open up, seek help or do the right thing. Sometimes the best you can do is back off and continue with the rest of your life.

And as for the person I unintentionally angered, well, I am sorry. I see the “keep out” sign now and believe 
me, I certainly will. I’ll give you the space you desire, but realize the ball's in your court. It’s your responsibility to let me know when or if the landmine is diffused.

That’s all for today. I hope you enjoy the video inspiration to go along with this entry below. Bye!