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By SherritheWriter
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How To Be At Your Best When The World Isn't

2/19/2020

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Today, I’d like to talk about how to be at your best when the world around you isn’t. The dopamine-high of Valentine’s Day has worn off, leaving people overwhelmed, frustrated, panicked, depressed, and even sick. Three days of this is enough! Folks, we need to stop this drama train before it crashes us (if it hasn’t already, as evidenced by the flu going around for the umpteenth time). Here are some tips to stay on top of your game:

Eat right, exercise, take your maintenance medications, and get enough sleep. This is pretty much the go-to for everything, because it’s the foundation of your life physically, spiritually, mentally, and emotionally. Talk to your doctor about what’s right for you, and establish it as daily habits. And if you know what you should be doing but aren’t, then stop making excuses, and start making progress. We all slip from time to time. Just get back on it. This goes for physical and mental health too, folks. While you live in this world, there is a mind-body connection. Be honest, and take care of both. You don’t have to advertise your business to the world – you just have to take care of it properly.

​When in doubt, always come back to this. As they used to say in marching band, a lot of problems are solved by going back to the fundamentals.

Take proper health precautions. Wash your hands, or use hand sanitizer if soap and water aren’t handy (yes, it does work against flu and other respiratory type illnesses). Talk to your doctor about what immunizations are necessary for your health conditions and age.  Clean up your home and work areas. Wipe surfaces with sanitizing wipes to kill germs, and don’t fear the Lysol. Wear rubber gloves or use a tissue or paper towel to open doors in public areas or entering/leaving public restrooms. Don’t touch your face unless you just washed your hands. Follow the first tip above. Most of all, don’t go out if you’re sick. Be a decent human being. Share the love, not the germs.

Practice relaxation techniques. Find what works for you, and employ it in your daily routine, be it meditation, yoga, or even a simple “time out.” Be sure to do at least one thing you enjoy each day. Take deep breaths and evaluate whether you’re really in tune to what’s happening right now, or reacting out of fear or emotional responses that aren’t relevant to the present.

Manage your emotions. If you find your anxiety rising or a situation causes a panic, stop what you’re doing immediately and take deep breaths for at least 30 seconds. Ask yourself what you’re scared of and honestly answer it, because anger, frustration, panic, and depression are always caused by fear. Consider if it’s possible that your emotions are being influenced by other things like hormonal fluctuations, medication side effects, a medical condition, or even fatigue. Follow the first tip above. Be led by logic, not emotions.

Read the instructions from start to finish before you ask questions. A lot of information is missed because people have a knew-jerk reaction to questions, instead of the patience to see if they’re addressed in due measure. If you do need to ask for assistance, stop and listen. Not everything  has a quick answer, and it might require multiple steps or additional information to get to the desired end result.

Practice time management. The number one thing you can do is let your smart phone live up to it’s name and make use of the calendar and reminder apps. When it comes to less time-sensitive things, the most critical thing is to know yourself well enough to know what’s practical and manageable for yourself, and to be sure to leave some free time in every day to relax and unwind. There are plenty of tips on time management on the Internet, so research them and find what works for you on a consistent basis.

Mind your own business. This isn’t just a sassy quip, it’s good advice to live by and probably the number one suggestion offered by pastors, therapists, and others in the metal health field all over the world. Your job in this world is to attend to your personal responsibilities to the best of your ability, and to support other people in attending to their responsibilities. But support doesn’t mean intrusion or unsolicited advice: it means talking less and listening more, because what most people need is for their loved ones to respect them and listen to them without judgement or intrusion. Offering unsolicited advice sends the message that you think don’t respect them and believe they’re incompetent, and nobody likes you when you send that message. Back off, attend to your business, and allow others the grace to attend to theirs. 

Be mindful of your driving. I say this over and over because we all think we’re excellent drivers, so we go on auto-pilot behind the wheel. Sorry folks, but time and chance happen on the highways more than in any other area of life. Nobody plans for a wreck. When you get behind the wheel of a car, you have one job: operate the vehicle safely and efficiently until you park it at your destination. Emotions and distractions can impair you as much as drugs or alcohol, so don’t drive if you can’t focus on driving and the tips above don’t “take it down” enough to be cognizant of the present and what’s happening around you right now. A brush-up on skills is also necessary, because we all tend to forget things. Invest in driver training refreshers if your employer doesn’t provide them, or simply download and read through the driver’s training manual. The consequences of a traffic accident follow you forever, whether you’re at fault or not. We all tend to take the privilege of driving for granted. We’d do everybody a favor if we didn’t.

I know it would be nice if we could all hibernate until winter, bad weather, busy seasons, stress, anxiety, and depression pass us by. Unfortunately, we’re human, not bears. Life will get stressful and unpleasant every now and then, and test us all. It’s hard, but it’s critical that you be at your best when the rest of the world isn’t. Stand your ground. We all get tested from time to time and you can pass the test, if you pray and use the techniques described here. I hope they’re helpful.

That’s all today. Take care, and have a great rest of the week.

Bye!

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What A Week!

2/5/2020

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It’s been quite an active week in the media – and it’s only Wednesday! Today, I’m going to do something I don’t often do: I’m going to give you my feedback on the stories that have captivated us, and that we're watching unfold this week.

The Superbowl Halftime Show. Honestly, I didn’t watch it because I feel it’s been over-the-top inappropriate for years. I’ve see the arguments from it’s an inspiration to “women of a certain age” to “it was inappropriate trash.” Honestly, I think it speaks to two problems we have as a society right now. First, we keep expecting bigger and better to “wow” us, which is leading to people pushing more boundaries to get attention. This isn’t good. How far can you raise the bar before it’s unattainable? Perhaps we should instead strive for a classy medium that displays talent in a way that’s appropriate for all viewers.

And ladies, let’s be honest. It hit at our ego since most of us are real people dealing with real things, like slowing metabolism and chronic health conditions. Of course it’s nerve wracking to see our husbands/significant others watching that and knowing this "ideal fantasy" is unattainable for us. Most of us  know we'll never be that thin or flexible (if we ever were!) again. We're real people with real lives who are loved and appreciated for the whole, human beings we are: flesh, health conditions, mind, and all. And don’t forget that you were salivating over Adam Levine and Bruno Mars in previous years. How do you think your men liked that?

The Iowa Caucuses. I have to admit that I laughed at the headline that said “the Democrats want to take over our health care, and they can’t even count votes!” Obviously, either we aren’t ready for AI or AI isn’t ready for us yet. I do love tech and am all for integrating it as much as possible, but I also realize it’s a work in progress, and the progress is always happening. Remember, we take in more information in a day than our progenitors got in a lifetime, and they didn’t get real time news. Be grateful for what you’ve got. The results will come. What’s most important is that they’re right, and that we learn from this glitch to improve in the future. Look at it as gaining wisdom.

The State of the Union. I never thought I’d see the day when the Speaker of the House behaved in such an immature, inappropriate manner. Pelosi did make a statement to the American people last night, and that statement said that she’s a whiny brat who can’t handle life in a mature and appropriate fashion. You just can’t justify her behavior. There are no circumstances where that was appropriate. In fact, it was downright disrespectful and rude to the President, to Congress, and to all of the honored guests attending.

We don’t need to encourage or tolerate this kind of immature, childish behavior in leaders - or anybody, for that fact. It’s already bleeding into our culture in disturbing ways, and it won’t stop unless we insist that our leaders grow up, or not be leaders anymore. You can’t be a strong company, institution, community, nation, or society if your leaders can’t act in a mature, intelligent manner guided by wisdom, not their own emotions. As a society, we already need a heavy dose of "grow up." Start now by dealing with this right. Let’s see if the bar from the outrage over the Joe Wilson “you lie!” outburst is still set that high – and if Pelosi can clear it.

The Impeachment. President Trump should have shaken Pelosi's hand before the State of the Union. I know it’s hard to shake the hand that stabbed you in the back, but he could have started by having some decorum of his own. But as it is, he’s probably thanking her for tearing up that speech. It virtually guarantees not only that the Senate won’t vote for impeachment, but that Pelosi will be in the crosshairs of media attacks and scrutiny for some time to come. No, the Impeachment isn't going to happen. We knew it all along, and Pelosi's childish outburst last night effectively killed her own efforts. I don't care what she says, her actions say that she does hate Trump. It was written all over her face last night, and her behavior backed that thing up. 
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Rush Limbaugh and Shannon Dougherty have Stage 4 cancers. I don’t care whether you’re a fan or not – this is awful news. I always hate to hear things like this, and pray for them. We all should. And I also pray that immunotherapy becomes the standard treatment and more affordable for everybody in the future. Two things we need cures for are cancer and dementia. They’re the worst way to go. If you can't have compassion over such suffering like AOC, then I don't envy what you'll reap from sowing such cruelty. I thought it was great that President Trump gave Limbaugh the Medal of Freedom. That was a wonderful moment. 

What a week, and it’s only halfway over! It will be interesting to see what’s to come. All I can say is that the political winds this week have been pushing this moderate more toward the right! We notice these little things, folks. When you're in the middle, it's the small stuff that makes the big impact on your decisions. Democrats are definitely coming undone this week.

That’s all today. Take care, and have a great rest of the week. One things for sure: it won’t be boring!

Bye!
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Discoveries and Decisions

2/3/2020

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I recently finished a round of revisions on Domino, and was once again impressed on how this novella shows promise for leading into my next book series. What’s better is that this one is the best of both worlds, as it mixes my two favorite genres (science fiction and mystery). It seems that every progressive draft of this work  provides encouragement that my writing is progressing beyond Earthside, and that I’m ready to move on to the next step of world building and genre mixes. The award for Progenitor in particular has inspired me of my ability to write better and more complex novels.

Then I looked over the short stories I’ve written over the past ten months and was not so impressed. In fact, I saw nothing of merit there. It was disappointing, because I had hoped to focus on writing better short stories in 2019, but that obviously didn't happen. Nor has it any of the other times I've made this decision - and how many times has that been over the nearly 20 years that I've been writing? A lot, and every time I come back to this same place of looking at my journal and going “ugh!”

You can’t be good at everything. The question is, when do I come to the point of admitting that I suck at writing short stories? I’m a novelist. I’ve always known that. The problem is, I want to be more, but I can seem to nail that down much beyond occasional articles and blogs.

Is this a problem? Likely not. In fact, perhaps it’s time for me to admit that short stories are going to be an “every now and then” thing, and get ok with it. I’ve done it before. I decided a year ago to focus my non-fiction work exclusively on The Roost, and perhaps other occasional blogs or articles, and that’s been a tremendous relief. I was finally able to write Domino, and focus on setting it up to lead into another book series. If I’m going to be writing book series, I do need to focus exclusively on fiction in that arena. Perhaps I need to make similar decisions with short stories.
Do I let them go, or find an area of focus for them? That’s where the hard decision comes in. One piece of feedback that I consistently get on Writing.com is that my stories hint at being part of something bigger, and they want to see more development in them. No doubt, the novelist in me is bleeding through in these shorter works, as it’s difficult for me to “contain” my work. What do I do? Do I find an area, like I did with non-fiction, and say I’ll do exclusively mystery short stories? Or do I throw up my hands and say “forget it, I’m a novelist, and a novelist is what I will be!”

Both scenarios work, and honestly I lean toward the first option of writing mystery short stories and being more expansive in my novels with scifi and mixed genres. The problem is lack of mystery ideas. My mind seems to be shifting toward developing the Domino world more. My interests are definitely in the sphere of scifi these days. And the heart of my muse is definitely more future focused than present tense.

You have to be true to yourself, so I suppose time will tell this tale. I can tell you the decision I’ve made today. As for what decision I actually live from here – I guess we’ll see. Perhaps it’s as simple as depending on where I am at the time, and right now, I’m in the scifi world.

That’s all today. Take care, and have a great week.

Bye!

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    Escape Reality

    By day, I'm a program assistant. By night, I'm an independent author. My fiction offers an escape from the reality of day-to-day life. See how my experiences lead to creating new worlds! 

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