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Why I Gave Up Giving Up Stuff For Lent

2/28/2017

 
Because it doesn’t work for me. I understand the concept of doing it and am not opposed to it. The problem is that I tend to fixate more on missing what I gave up than on having gratitude for how Christ suffered for my salvation. It didn’t take long for me to realize that the whole “fasting” thing wasn’t clicking right in my mind, and I need to find another way to understand the meaning of this season of denial. Another thing that particularly bothered me was that it seemed that giving something up for Lent called attention on yourself. Without fail, when you give something up, then it keeps coming into your life, and resisting the temptation is something that can be difficult to do with grace. And sometimes, people do get loud about what they gave up, as if to say “look at how pious I am.” As Jesus said, they have their reward in full already. That’s not the point and if it can’t be done with a pure heart and discretion, then I’m better off doing nothing at all.
 
Several years ago, a pastor at our church suggested another approach: instead of giving up something, why not take up something new, like a delayed New Year’s Resolution. The 40 days of Lent are a perfect time frame to try things, or to get back on track with actual New Year’s Resolutions that have fallen to the wayside. Given that our time and habits are important things to us, this is as much of a sacrifice as giving up something you love, because it forces you to give up time and habits to form a new one. I’ve tried this a few times and had more success with it, mainly in organization and in finding ways to keep my “to do” list under control (or at least manageable). I like this because it’s more discrete than the fasting thing. It’s more about internal motivation and self discipline. Sure, it may call as much attention to you as the Lenten fasting, but it seems to me that this is done in a more positive context.
 
Another suggestion I heard was to dedicate a specific time to Bible reading, prayer, or spiritual contemplation during the 40 days of Lent. Again, this is a sacrifice of time with the hope of building a habit that you’ll carry forward into Easter and beyond. I’ve tried this last year with rosary prayers. I'm Lutheran, but I thought this might help my mental discipline and prayer habits. I made it through Lent, I’m sorry to say it didn’t stick. It was too rigid, and the reason I broke it was because I needed more flexibility instead of the pre-programmed prayers I was offering which, I’m sorry to say, became more rote recitation than an act of the heart. I’m modifying this approach this year by designating my prayer time as more of a meditation, so I can deal with the issues on my heart, and improve my mental discipline better than I did in last year’s failed efforts.  I like this Lenten activity the best, because it’s personal, discrete, and focuses on true spiritual needs without calling undue attention on yourself. It’s a private reflection of the spirit, which is what Lent is supposed to be about.
 
Of course, I encourage you to do your Lenten fast if it works for you, and you’re happy with the results. The point is that your Lenten journey is a personal one, and there are several ways you can take it. If giving stuff up doesn’t work for you, then there are other options that are just as effective and meaningful in speaking to the soul.
 
That’s all today. Take care, and have a great week.
 
Bye!

Roses and Noses

2/23/2017

 
​Sometimes, things flow so well that it seems the world is molded around you. That was last week for me. Things went to smoothly that I thought wow, I wish life were always this easy. Everything went faster and better than expected, and I was on top of the world. What a difference a week makes. This week, my plans keep getting knocked around like billiards. I’ve actually referred to the past few days as “boom time” because my plans have exploded so much that I’m in a constant state of adjustment and rearranging. Things are getting done, but it’s requiring more work and a lot more grace than last week did.
 
There are times like that. It’s not just the “flow” of life, either. Sometimes, it’s an internal motivation thing. It’s taken more self discipline to stay focused on my goals and keep doing what I’m supposed to do to keep the forward momentum. You don’t always “feel it,” and have to ignore your feelings and move on regardless. Sometimes, your days are comfortable shoes and rose perfume. Other times, it’s dress clothes and Vicks under your nose. That’s the nature of life. Progress is progress, whether it flows or takes a push to keep the momentum going.
 
Yes, there are times when it’s hard to keep your crap together, but it can be done.  The important thing is not to give up, and to dedicate yourself to seeking opportunity, and doing the best you can today. And, of course, giving thanks: for the flow when it happens, and for grace, mercy, discipline, and motivation when it doesn’t.
 
This week has been more work, but it’s no loss. In fact, things are still moving along well. They might not have moved as I hoped, and I had to get out and push a bit, but by golly, it’s moving.
 
That’s all today. Have a Happy Friday tomorrow and a wonderful weekend.
 
Bye!

Why The Media Needs a Reboot

2/21/2017

 
Picture
I don’t usually address politics, but the media thing has gotten completely out of hand, and now, for me, it’s personal. A friend died Sunday, and the local media made her look like an eccentric fool. The original article about the house fire by The Hour News went above and beyond in painting a picture of a hopeless hoarder who brought about her own demise, and neighbors with a “meh” attitude toward the tragedy. In my humble opinion, they can take this article and (ahem) shove it in a place where solids are typically eliminated. And that’s much kinder than how another one of our friends put it on Twitter today!
 
The original article that ran yesterday revealing her identity was just as bad, as they went into details not only of hoarding and the poor state of her home, but went further to describe leins and digging into her financial situation. Never mind that a person passed away. Neighbors said she was reclusive, so let’s paint the dirtiest picture we can. They never even got her age right, because she was 20 years younger than they originally posted, and they never corrected that. The article was rewritten by the time I sat down to supper, after an outpouring from her 5,000+ Twitter fans expressing grief over a kind, dear friend who encouraged and inspired so many others lost, and her missing parrot.
 
It seems that The Hour learned about the power of the Internet and social media yesterday, and I’m darn proud to be part of that movement. Suddenly, she was a human being that people other than her daughter cared about a lot, and more of the world was watching than they imagined from this person that they vilified. Officials went back into the house and confirmed that they found a cage but no bird, and “neighbors” are looking for the bird now that a #prayersforpenne and #insearchofpenne campaigns have been launched. 
 
Screw you. Proximity does not make a neighbor anymore. It’s pitiful enough that the local media went to extremes to create a sensational headline, but the fact that you didn’t think to look for the bird in the first place? You knew she had Penne. She took him outside for flight practice – I know because she proudly shared the pictures on Twitter. Amazon parrots don’t hang out just anywhere, and you know they’re domestic birds. Why did it take 5,000 strangers from other parts of the country and even outside of the United States to inspire the people IN HER NEIGHBORHOOD do the right thing?

Here's one more thing to think about: parrots have the intelligence of a two to five year old child. You better believe that if Penne were a child, they wouldn't have had to go back to look for them, because they'd have been out there since Sunday morning. That poor bird, if he's alive, is scared, alone, cold, and just lost his human "mommy" in a scary tragedy. But what do I know? It's just a bird. Yes, I rolled my eyes. Get over it.
 
This was a human being that perished in a tragic accident. There are people grieving over her loss. And Penne (her Amazon) was just as beloved. We’re worried about him and pray he’s ok. These aren’t just passing headlines. These are lives that are happening every day, and they’re touching others in ways you can’t imagine unless you live it. So screw you, media. President Trump is right: you need to report the news. Period. No opinions. No “spin.” No bias. That’s what journalism is. This incident has proven that you don’t know what you’re talking about. You’re too busy putting your “spin” on the story to grab a headline from tragedy, and you’re trying to boost your own ego in the process. You’ve gotten away with this nonsense for too long and are becoming useless. Your blatant disregard for the person you portrayed in this situation makes it look like you aren’t decent human beings. Are you? If so, then prove it. Do the right thing, and be accountable. Stop trying to be superstars and start telling us what’s actually happening in the world like you’re supposed to.
 
Our love and prayers go to Alice’s family and friends. We still can’t believe it’s happened and we grieve with you, so you aren’t alone.  I pray that Penne is found safe and healthy.
 
That’s all today.
 
Bye!

Need a Netflix or Kindle Recommendation?

2/16/2017

 
I’ve seen several posts on social media lately asking for suggestions on things to watch on Netflix, or books to read. Today, I’d like to give you suggestions on things that have impressed me, knocked my socks off, and blown me away.
 
ON NETFLIX
 
Game of Thrones. If you follow me on social media, then you know I’m crazy about this show, and it all started with Rick getting the first few episodes on Netflix. I believe it’s the most brilliant show on TV, it makes you think, and it hooks you in. Once, we watched an entire season (10 episodes) in 3 days, and the only reason it took us that long is because we had to work. It’s addictive! But as a disclaimer, it is violent and has a perverse joy in pushing boundaries and killing off characters – sometimes in grisly manner.
 
Breaking Bad. If Game of Thrones is the most brilliant show on television, then Breaking Bad is a close second. Not only is it humorous to find a chemistry teacher bumbling into the drug business with a former student, but it also raises excellent moral issues on how far one would go to secure the ones they love, when faced with life and death. There is a plot to this show, and it’s executed brilliantly. And if you like this world, then you’ll also enjoy Better Call Saul, the prequel to this show currently running (and set to resume in April). It focuses on a different part of the story, but it’s just as interesting and creative.
 
House of Cards. If you like political thrillers, then you’ll love this show. It takes you inside the dirty underworld of D.C. politics, complete with shady deals, questionable morals, and how that affects people from the top to the bottom. Frank Underwood is your stereotypical politician on the road to the top no matter what the price, and it’s intriguing to see how far he will go to get from Gaffney, SC, to The White House.
 
Stranger Things. If you like paranormal but you’re sick of zombies, werewolves, and glittery vampires, then check out this show. It’s about three kids who search for a friend who disappears on his way home one night. It’s a throwback 80’s show, but it’s excellent in handling not only the paranormal mystery, but the effect it has on the kids families, friends, and the community around them.
 
That’s it for the TV. I know, it’s a short list, but you know me – I like books better, so let’s move on to that. I’ve included buy links in the title, if you’re interested in picking some of these up for your next read.
 
ON YOUR KINDLE - SCIFI
 
Mercury Ice – The Seventh Coordinate by Michael Moore and Sara Crawford. This story is the brilliant tale of finding life in a small corner of the planet Mercury that can support life. Moore has a gift for making readers feel the story with his readers, from the amazement of the initial discovery to the excitement and intrigue of first contact between these two humanoid settlements. The sequel is due out on March 7, and I’m looking forward to it.
 
The Exodus Trilogy by Andreas Christensen. Mars is destroyed by impact with a rogue planet. On the surface, it looks like a near miss, until scientists discover that the debris from this cosmic event will  collide with Earth and render it uninhabitable in the near future. The government, desperate to save humanity, secretly launches a ship of carefully selected humans to populate a planet in a distant star system to save the race and start over. The trilogy is an amazing tale of survival, courage, and what happens when ordinary people are left to their own devices to preserve the species.
 
The Mars Trilogy by Kim Stanley Robinson. Robinson’s tale of the terraforming and colonization of Mars in Red Mars, Green Mars, and Blue Mars is a fascinating adventure into science and human nature. You get the best of seeing  man’s first adventures into interstellar development and in seeing how it impacts people, from the scientific colonists to the people left behind to deal with the struggles of a crumbling ecology on Earth. While I felt that the ending to the trilogy was a bit forced and rushed, the story as a whole is captivating and thrilling. It’s definitely a must-read for scifi fans.
 
ON YOUR KINDLE – MYSTERY/SUSPENSE
 
Here Comes the Night by Linda McDonald. This is a fast paced tale where one crime segues into countless others on a Friday evening that seems to stretch on forever. A late afternoon murder leads from abduction to theft to a joyride that connects several journeys into a whirlwind tale of mystery, intrigue, love, murder, money, and retribution. If you like mystery stories that take place in a short time frame, then you’ll be hooked by this book.
 
Mortom by Erik Therme. If Craig was surprised that his cousin committed suicide, then he was more surprised to inherit the estate. At first, it looks like he didn’t get much – an old house and a lot of debt. Then Craig discovers a clue in the house that leads him on a journey to find his cousin’s true final wish. This intriguing story takes readers on a journey not only through a complex puzzle between cousins, but into the devastating effects of family secrets, and how it impacts life in a small town. Mortom is an intriguing mystery that you won’t be able to put down.
 
Kill All Cats, by Rick Bylina. Ron Black had an ordinary life, until he found that his elderly neighbor, along with her 38 cats, were murdered. He’s more surprised to find that he’s the prime suspect, even though he was at work as a night security guard when the murder happened. Despite the alibi, he becomes suspect because he was stricken with food poisoning at the time that the alleged murder happened. Odd comments and an alarming clue found in his cockatiel’s play place lead Rick to suspect that he’s been framed by his neighbors, but why? This mystery has it all: an excellent plot, an intriguing mystery, great characters, the right amount of suspense and humor, and best of all, a bird!
 
ON YOUR KINDLE – INSPIRATIONAL/SELF HELP
 
Psycho-Cybernetics: Updated and Expanded by Maxwell Maltz. I’ve had several people tell me that while The Secret has good, inspiring information, they feel it’s too “new agey” to mesh with their Christian beliefs. I will agree that while The Secret is inspiring and motivating, I’m not completely on board with everything in it because I have seen blatant discrepancies between some of the more new age stuff and reality. Psycho-Cybernetics solves this problem by showing the true impact of a healthy self-image and positive thinking with applied with your faith.  Maltz was a plastic surgeon, and was surprised by how cosmetic work had a tremendous impact on some patients, and none on others. His discoveries on how self-image shaped their healing led to more research on how the inside affects the outside. Although written in 1960, this book has been updated and still contains surprising and encouraging insights for improving your life by applying faith to develop a healthy self image and a positive mindset.
 
Love Wins: A Book About Heaven, Hell, and the Fate of Every Person Who Ever Lived by Rob Bell. This is another one that will make you think about how everything is connected. Like The Secret, I’m not on board with everything in this book, but it makes more excellent points than points of disagreement, and it presents relevant things to ponder about what living by faith means. If your faith is strong and you’re mind is open, it can broaden your horizons on how significant our life on Earth truly is.
 
ON YOUR KINDLE – WRITING GUIDES/REFERENCES
 
Smashwords Style Guide by Mark Coker. If you selfpublish, then this book is a requirement. There’s a lot more to publishing an ebook than downloading the file – there are formatting and cover requirements that are critical to get a good, polished product from your laptop to the ereader. This is my “go to” guide for every book I publish. Best of all, this guide is free so there’s no excuse. Click that link and get it!
 
How to Write a Short Story that Works by Michael Allen. I’ve read a lot of writing and reference guides, and this is, without a doubt, both the most honest and helpful I’ve ever read. Allen tells you point blank what goes into creating a great short story, and how to reach readers in a short, powerful tale. In fact, I believe this book contains advice that I haven’t seen in others. It’s well worth getting if you write short fiction, and will help your craft tales that grab your readers and live on in the mind long after the story ends. 
 
So that’s my suggestion list to keep you entertained for a while. I hope you like these suggestions and find something that captivates you.
 
That’s all today. Take care. Have a Happy Friday tomorrow and a wonderful weekend.
 
Bye!

What Positive Thinking Really Needs to Work

2/14/2017

 
I’ve been reading many self help books lately as I research and work on Joy on the Journey, and have made a discovery. It seems that the power of positive thinking is a recurring theme these days. Actually, I think it’s been around for a while, but we’re seeing another surge in this type of self help since The Secret came out in 2007 (can't believe that was 10 years ago!). I’ll admit that it’s a powerful book. If you haven’t read it or watched the video, I highly suggest it. It can truly shift your paradigm and set you on a better mental course than you’ve ever known possible. There’s no doubt that a positive mindset is just better for you – it helps you to see the blessings around you, to embrace the relationships in your life, and to treasure what you’ve got. But there’s one thing that they miss: while they tell you that you can start where you are and grow from here, they don’t tell you how to do that. And this, perhaps, is the most critical step of all.

Think about it: before you take a journey, you need to know where you are, and why you’re there. These may seem like simple questions, but let’s pause a moment and ponder it deeper. There are two critical questions you need to answer before you can make progress toward your goals. First, do you know where you are in life? This is easy to simplify. You are where you are because of decisions (or mistakes) that you’ve made up to this point. Fair enough. But how do you expect to move forward wisely unless you fully understand why you are where you’re at? So it isn’t as simple as “I made a decision, and it led me here.” Sure, you made it, but how did you come to it? How were you led? By right things, or wrong? By following the Lord’s lead, or running from it? By your own will, or something greater within you? This is a critical question to answer so you understand what’s motivating you, what voices you’re listening to, and the purity of your motives.  I’m not just talking about mistakes, either. You can learn from what you’ve done right, too. And if too much “dumb luck” has gone into things, well, you need to establish a better system then that or who knows where you’ll end out?
 
The second question to ponder is “why are you here?” The Lord allowed you to come to the place where you’re at for a reason. Do you know why? What have you learned in this place that has helped you to grow, shifted your paradigm, and strengthened your faith? Has that happened, or have you been simply existing? We’re always supposed to be growing, learning, and preparing for blessings to come, so if you’ve been marking time, then you don’t get it, and won’t get anywhere until you start working with what you’ve got. So, what do you have, and what are you doing with it? Are you doing the best that you can every day? If not, then why should you be trusted with more or different when you don’t get what you’ve got? If you really want to have a better life, then you need to make the most of the  life that you have right now.

I’m all for the power of positive thinking. It’s critical to have a strong faith, a sunny outlook on life, and a healthy respect for yourself and others to achieve all you’re meant to achieve in life. I also agree that the past shouldn’t hold us back, but we also need to realize that it’s all connected, and we can’t truly move forward until we’ve learned from what was and fully utilize what is. It’s the foundation of who we are, and if we aren’t rooted in that foundation, then all the happy thoughts in the world won’t get us out of our rut. We need to rise above, and to do that, we need to know what we’re rising from. Our goal achieved mountain top experiences are rare, meaning that we spend most of our life on a journey from one goal to another. That means that finding joy in life is in learning to embrace and enjoy that journey fully, and to do that, we need to understand where we’ve been, where we are, and where we’re going. I hope that Joy on the Journey can help people to discover where they’re at, so they can find a clear path to where they want to be in their faith life.

That’s all today. Have a wonderful week.

Bye!

Why I Don't Like Valentines Day

2/9/2017

 
I don’t like Valentine’s Day. I know that sounds odd coming from a woman, but the truth is that I’ve never liked it. The expectations are so high that it seems that the holiday sets us up for disappointment, and it often succeeds. I’d venture so far as to say that only “new couples” tend to really enjoy the holiday, as my experiences have shown it’s more of a problem than a celebration.
 
I remember back in the day when I was in grammar school, and had to write Valentine Cards for everybody in my class. Not only was that one more thing to do besides homework (cutting into my valued reading and play time), but I’ve never been the popular type that had a lot of friends. My “inner circle” usually consisted of between one and three friends, and they may or may not have been in my homeroom class – meaning that I was writing cards for a bunch of people that I only vaguely knew. And everybody had to get one, even the guy that copied off my paper during spelling tests and the girl who always got recess cut in half for the entire class because she didn’t know to shut up when the teacher said to can it or recess gets shortened with each word. So Valentine’s Day wasn’t much fun, even during school days.
 
Fast forward to my freshman year in college, when my brother got married on Valentine’s Day weekend. I wasn’t dating anybody at the time (Rick and I met and started dating 8 months later), and nobody had a problem making me feel bad about it. It really got to me because I was 18 at the time, and didn’t realize that they were showing their own a**. Fortunately, I had some fabulous friends that were in a similar dating dry spell, and we had fun with pizza, Pepsi, and Star Trek marathons. If anything, people shaming me for not having a boyfriend made me realize the value of family and great friends, so despite my hurt pride it did give me a valuable lesson. Still, not one to build up my fondness for Valentine’s Day.
 
My last Valentine’s Day fiasco was a few years later, in my early working days. In my first days in this job, I worked in a small office. There were 30 of us sharing one floor of a building, so let’s just say that moods, like germs and gossip, were highly contagious. Nowhere was this more apparent than the year when Valentine’s Day fell on a Friday, and everybody was freaking out about how they were going to “do up” the night right. Nerves, stress, and frustration built on our regular workload equaled a lot of frayed tempers and more than a few raised voices and snarky comments from people the flower delivery guy didn’t stop for that day. It’s rare for a Friday to be a bad day, but that was probably one of the worse Fridays of my work life.
 
Frankly, I believe Valentine’s Day is nothing more than a consumer holiday to boost retail in an otherwise slow season that’s starting to see the profits from Christmas slip away to operational costs. That’s why the expectations are so high: to encourage you to show your love by spending more money. Relationships are a daily investment, not a once a year blitz. And I’m not the only one who believes this. In fact, Rick waited until March 14 to propose, because he felt that doing it on a holiday was cliché and lazy. He thought we needed our own special day, and I agree that it was nice to do it a month (or two, for those who got engaged at Christmas) after everybody else got engaged, so it was our own special time. Plus, it surprised a lot of people.
 
My point is that you can’t win with Valentine’s Day, so don’t try. And for goodness sake, don’t let it make you feel bad, because you’re better than that. Besides, nobody writes card anymore anyway. And you can have wine and a meal anytime – and probably a lot less crowded if you wait until February 15! But hey, if it works for you, then let us know your secret.
 
That’s all today. Take care. Have a Happy Friday tomorrow and a wonderful weekend.
 
Bye! 

More Things That Make Me Go Hmm --

2/2/2017

 
I’ve never understood Groundhog’s Day. A shadow has absolutely no impact or correlation on how fast the Earth revolves around the sun, or the planet’s axial tilt. Still, people gather round the Internet to see whether that shadow was seen. Then they’re surprised when we have an Arctic blast a few days later, despite the fact that this rock is still on the winter side of the sun. 
 
Hope is one thing, but superstition is another. If you believe that a groundhog can determine the seasons, then you better spread rock salt around your house if you live anywhere near a funeral home or cemetery to keep the spirits out as well. Better go ahead and put in for Good Friday off too if you want to plant a garden so it will be guaranteed to grow.
 
It isn’t just superstitions that confound me, though. There are other ordinary, everyday things that make me go “hmm,” and nobody can explain them to me. For example, why do people:
 
Struggle with technology? We’re nearly two decades into the new millennium, and I still get behind people that can’t figure out debit cards. How is this possible when computers are everywhere, and have been for the lifetime of two current generations sharing this world with us? I realize they get “glitchey” and have their bad moments, but swiping a card or tapping a key isn’t rocket science. We’d still be an agrarian society if it were.
 
Wear shorts and T-shirts in the winter? I don’t mean the mild days in the 60’s and 70’s. I’m talking about the day I went out last month when it was 40 degrees with wind gusts at 30 mph, and I saw three people outside wearing shorts, T-shirts, and flip flops. I got cold just looking at them. And before you say “oh, this is nothing if you’re from up north –“ even Santa Clause wears a coat. Come on, folks. I’m real enough to tell you that 95 degrees with 40% humidity is bad in the summer, so let’s get real about winter, too. 
 
Pay for cable or satellite service? That’s probably the biggest scam in the world, and it surprises me that people fall for it. We have a digital antenna for local channels, and a Roku with SlingTV and Netflix for everything else. Sure, the antenna and Roku were an up front investment, but our monthly TV costs us less than $40 and we watch what we want. You’re paying for Internet anyway, so essentially you’re paying for the same thing twice if you have cable or satellite. Why not upgrade your Internet and cut the cord? And besides, do you really watch all of those channels?
 
If you’re shaking your head and saying “Sherri, you just don’t get it,” then you’re right. I certainly don’t get these and many other things. And I’ll be there are things you don’t get, too!
 
That’s all today. Take care. Have a Happy Friday tomorrow and a wonderful weekend.
 
Bye!

    Escape Reality

    By day, I'm a program assistant. By night, I'm an independent author. My fiction offers an escape from the reality of day-to-day life. See how my experiences lead to creating new worlds! 

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