It confounds me how people refuse to correctly deal with toxic relationships, bad habits, and manageable health situations and then not understand why their life is a mess. Saying you don’t want to seek treatment or take medication for fear of “stigma” or addiction to pills to get through your day is actually telling the universe that you want to suffer and be sick. Refusing to kick an addiction or an unhealthy habit because “it’s not that big of a deal, and besides, so many other people are doing it,” is telling the universe that you don’t value your life and want to hasten your demise through a long, drawn out medical battle that will steal years you could be enjoying. Saying you don’t want to terminate a bad relationship because “they need me and maybe my good influence can save them” is telling the universe that you want to be mistreated and abused. Refusing to do the right thing or to take the time to do things the best you can “because I don’t have time for that” is painting a bullseye on you for the devil to take his best shot – and believe me, he always takes that challenge.
Stop fooling yourself into believing that you’ve being prudent, gracious, or forgiving – just tell the truth and say that you don’t want to fact the problem, so you’re making excuses and running. When you say “that’s just me,” you’re inviting defeat into every area of your life. When you say “oh, that’s just them. That’s just how Jack/Jane is,” then you’re cheating them and sentencing them to further defeat when in fact, standing up to them could very well save them. Accepting bad things is nothing more than an excuse to stay settled in a comfortable rut, and guaranteeing that the world will shovel the dirt over you when it’s ready to bury you. What you allow not only continues, but compounds.
I’ve heard a lot of people telling me that I expect too much out of life, myself, and other people. I’ve been told I’m too hard on myself and others. I’ve been railed as an idealist with no concept for the realities of life. I’ve been told my ideas are too post-modern. Do you know where every one of these people are? Exactly in the same place they were when they said those things five, ten, or fifteen years ago, which happens to be in my past, because I’ve moved on. They’re buried in their comfort and I’ve moved on multiple times in come cases because I’m not afraid to ask the hard questions, make the best of what I had, take advantage of opportunities, correct wrongs, set boundaries about what I will and won’t allow in my day to day life, and embrace change. They accepted excuses and remained. I didn’t, and built a bigger life. By all rights, I have no right to be where I am, according to these people. What separates me from them is the audacity to actually do what they said shouldn’t or couldn’t be done.
It’s time to chuck the excuses and accept this reality: you can’t win the war when you refuse to fight any battles. How are you going to run a company when you allow one person to run all over you? How are you going to get well if you don’t do what your doctor says to do? How can you enjoy your retirement when you won’t work now? How can you write the novel, start the project, take on the hobby, or go on your mission when you crash out in front of the television every night because you’re “tired and not feeling it.” How do you plan to get the promotion, the nomination, the title, the respect, the award, or the friends if you’re angry, bitter, jealous, and walking around with a two-ton chip on your shoulder? If you don’t reap it, you can’t sow it. And you usually get back more than you invest, whether it’s seed or whirlwind. That can be encouraging or disturbing, depending on what you’re allowing in your life right now.
Folks, there’s no excuse for accepting less than the best in your life. Don’t shoot yourself in the foot and then scream because you’re hurt and bleeding. Goodness sake, how many times have I told you to read The Secret? And if you say “I don’t do that new age stuff,” then read Me and My Big Mouth, by Joyce Meyer. Same message surrounded by scripture, and written ten years earlier. We live in an age of information, and the secrets to making the best of life aren’t secrets anymore. Take advantage of this age of information and use it to make a better life.
That’s all today. Take care, and have a great week.