I'd like to expand on something I said in my last blog entry about how "the villians make the story." We don't actively think about, but it's true that without the villians there would be no story - not in real life or in fiction. That's one thing they share in common. After all, where's the excitement in just another day? There's not much, is there? In fact, we have a term for long periods of time without resistance. We call it a rut.

That's not to say that problems are desirable. Heck no. I could do with fewer "adventures" in my life, truth be told. But the fact of the matter is that we grow when we have resistance. It's the tough times, struggles, and pain in the butt people where we learn and grow the most. That's not a truth many of us want to face, but it is a truth. Look back over your life, and I'll be the times you learned the most were during your greatest struggles. It was true for me. I took a lot of lessons from those instances I described in my last entry. I learned how to stand up for myself, how to stand up for what's right, and how to deal with fragile egos (because frankly, a lot of those problems went to a root of fragile egos addicted to approval). I learned not to fear change and to have confidence in myself and my abilities no matter what other people thought or said about me, and that strength gave me the confidence to build a house, successfully move to and integrate into a new office, and to publish 4 books (and some inspiration for said books too). To put it bluntly, manure is a fertilizer and fertilizer makes things grow. If you learn from your experiences and use those lessons to better yourself then you will be prepared for greater blessings ahead. So think of the crap you deal with as the stimulus to grow your spirit and take you to new heights.

I know, that's not a pretty metaphor. Frankly, it stinks. (Oh, another bad joke). But it's relevant and you have to admit that it's not a cliche comparisome. And you won't forget it either, will you?

Anyway, back to the point ...

I believe the series finile of "Smallville" hit it close to the mark when Lex Luthor told Clark Kent "I used to think your friends defined a man. But it's actually enemies that define a man." I believe that's a bit extreme and one sided, but it has a grain of truth. Our enemies, or rather the people we find ourselves clashing with and struggling against, do have a certain amount of definition to our own lives because they are often dark images of ourselves. I've blogged in previous entries about how each of us tends to be a magnant for people that are our polar opposite and that the people we struggle with tend to have a common root issue - for example, with me it seems there are always jealous, petty people around. I can't seem to get rid of them. And the reason I struggle with them is because I want to be my best and help others be their best. Therein lies my own Lex Luthor. We all have one and if you look at the people you're in strife with, I'll bet you'll see that same dark image of yourself in them. The real story and lessons lie in how we deal with them. Do you fight to win, stand your ground, or swat them away like a bug and keep on keeping on. There is no one right answer becase it depends on who and what you're dealing with. I had to stand my ground and occationally fight the last ones in my life, but the answer for the present ones seems to be ignoring them. Just keep doing my thing and let them seeth and have their pity party all alone because I'm busy and have stuff to do.

That's why every experience is different. It's because you can have the same situation and a different answer due to the context of the situation. The last jealous people I dealt with feared confrontation and avoided it, so fighting forced them to do something they found so unpleasant that they'd back off. But the ones in my life now live for and absolutely love the fight and the challenge it brings. They hate to be ignored - so I ignore them. As I said before, different context = different solution. And the same principle applies in fiction as in real life.

Yes, the villians do make the stories. It's provides the catalyst to grow and learn in real life. It provides the plot in fiction. Because without villians, there is no story. There is no growth. there is no spark to life.

So don't be too hard on those pain in the butt people. After all, they can be quite useful if you know how to utilize them correctly. In fiction and in reality.

That's all for today. Take care and have a good week.

Bye!

Last night was the big, huge, series finale of Smallville - one of my favorite TV shows. You notice I said series finale, as in this is the last episode of this show they will make forever and ever. I worked my butt off all week to make sure all the chores and errands would be done so I'd be free to watch it because, of course, I've looked forward to this epic episode ever since they announced the date and that Michael Rosenbaum would return to reprise his role as Lex Luthor. So last night, I made supper and went to special efforts to feed the birds, do the filing, and take my shower before the show came on at 8:00.

At 7:55, the power went out. Surprise! We had an unforecasted thunderstorm. The power was out for nearly an hour, meaning we missed half the show. Then the weather service kept breaking in during the remainder of the show with alerts of storm warnings as the storm moved to counties to our east. So not only did we not really know why things got where they were, but we missed a good portion of what we were able to watch. And no power means no DVR so - there. Gone. Just like that.

Now before you say "But Sherri, you can watch it online!" stop. I've heard that 4 times already, so just stop right there because it really pissed me off all 4 times. They missed the fundamental point. I know they will not only post it online, but that an encore presentation is scheduled to air next Thursday (and I may be able to buy it from iTunes too). Having to wait a bit longer is a minor frustration. I'm frustrated because I was looking forward to having the experience of watching a new episode of one of my favorite TV shows one last time, and it was taken away from me. It's not that I missed the show. It's that I missed the experience of seeing a new episode, as has been my habit for years, for the last time. I'll never get that back.

If this were just one thing passing out of my life, perhaps I wouldn't be so upset. But considering all of the major changes I've seen in the past year and all of the things that have passed out of my life already, it's a bitter pill to swallow. It's not just this. It's this on top of everything else that's passed out of my life over the past year, much of which I also did not get to bid a proper farewell to because they passed out suddenly, unexpectedly, or not as I planned. That seems to be a pattern in my life.

The point of this entry is not to gripe, but to tell you to please be sensitive to people. If they're sharing something with you that seems trivial, it's not that simple to them. It's something that's hurting them on a deeper level because, after all, if the simple solution worked then they probably wouldn't bother to share it at all. To throw out the first thing that flies through your brain, while seemingly helpful, can be slapping a dab of ointment and a Band-Aide on a wound that needs stitches. So please, don't be dismissive with a plithy reply. It may be that they aren't looking for answers. They're looking for somebody to understand and respect the fact that something small hurt them in a big way.

I'm not upset because I missed a TV show. I'm upset because I missed having an experience for the last time. I am consoled to know they will rerun it Thursday. I don't understand why they can't do it over this weekend, but considering that CW has been wanting this show to go away for at least 2 years, I guess we'd better be glad they're being gracious enough to show it a second time at all. And since they used to run new episodes of Smallville on Thursday, this may be a better experience for me. It won't be the same, but maybe it will be good. At any rate, nothing better get between me and the TV Thursday night. Or Friday either, for that matter, since the season finale of Supernatural comes on then. I already checked the weather and the weather is supposed to be clear. Then again, they didn't call for anything but the possibility of a stray shower last night and we had a wrathful storm that knocked out power out, so I don't trust the forecast too  much!

That's it for this time. A deep entry, but we're done swimming for now. I pray for better luck for the rest of the weekend and that your weekend will be a good one.

Bye!