I got my first “dud” Christmas gift when I was 16 years old. It was one of those “trolls” that were so popular in the early to mid-90’s. I don’t know if any of you remember them – they were small dolls with outfits and wild hair. They were quite the craze at the time, and one of my friends thought I’d like one. 

I hated it. But I didn’t want to offend her, so I put on a smile and said “wow, it’s interesting.” Unfortunately, this friend didn’t know me well enough to know that “interesting” from me could me in a good or bad way. I meant the bad way. She thought I meant the good way. And the word spread. Then someone got the bright idea: Let’s help Sherri build up a troll collection. 

I wound out with countless of these hideous, ugly figurines. The rumor even made it’s way to my family, who also bestowed me with several to add to my “collection.” I didn’t know what to do, because I understood their intentions were good and didn’t want to offend anybody. So for years, I had a corner of my room devoted to this hideous, ugly monstrosity building up in my life. By the time Rick and I started dating 3 years later, the collection took up an entire shelf on my bookshelf. They represented every holiday or possible event that had taken place in my life.

 “That’s an interesting collection,” Rick commented. 

“I hate them!” I said, finally cracking. “Somebody thought I liked them and told everybody!”

“Really? Then why do you have them up? That’s only going to encourage people to give you more of them.”

That made me think. I was in college by that time, and had lost touch with many of the old high school friends that gave me those horrible monsters. So I took the collection down. A few friends that visited asked about them later and I told them that I outgrew it and was no longer interested in the collection. Their popularity was waning by that time anyway (thank God), so I didn’t face too many questions over it. 
 
Looking back, that whole three year scenario was avoidable. I could have been honest and told my friends that I appreciated the unique gift, but I didn’t want to make a collection out of them. Or I could have “regifted” it to a friend at another school the next year. I didn’t want to hurt anybody’s feelings, but honesty really is better in the long run, and I resented those trolls for far longer than any feelings would have been hurt by just saying from the start that I didn’t like the things. 
 
The point of this entry is that you’re going to get a gift that’s a dud every now and then. We celebrate the holidays every year, so it’s inevitable that something is going to be a bust from time to time. The secret is to handle these situations appropriately and as discretely as possible. If it’s a wrong size or style or if it’s something you can’t have because of allergy or health problems, be honest. Remember that people give you gifts because they want you to use them, and they’ll feel bad if you can’t. If it’s something that can be corrected, by all means talk to them and get it exchanged or refunded so the problem can be corrected. If it’s something that you can’t have because of your health, let people know because they don’t want their gifts to make you sick. 

And if it’s a “troll” situation like mine, well, you have options. You can give it a try. I thought the slipper socks from my last entry were going to be another “troll,” but I tried them and they because a gem. Sometimes things do work out in unexpected ways. If you don’t want to give it a try, you can ask about exchanging it for something more appropriate, or you can regift it. I warn you, though, to note the name of the giver. Regifting to the person that gave you the present is rude, so be discrete and make sure you give it to somebody different.   

Then there are those situations where the person gives you the same thing every year, and by golly they aren’t going to change  no matter what. I’ve known a few people that give magazine subscriptions every year and they refuse to give anything else, even though many of their recipients have asked for something different every year. Likewise, I think we’ve all had the one relative that gives you a gift that you absolutely can’t use every year, and they won’t consider a change. These are usually situations where the giver  has limited resources, and they probably can’t do much more.  You have no choice but to accept these gifts. But take heart. You’ll probably appreciate those handmade towels or sweaters one day for happy memories, even if you wouldn’t dream of wearing them in public. And magazines can be shared, so take those issues to the “giveaway” table at work, or donate them to a local doctor’s or dentist’s office. 

Incidentally, I ran across one of those pesky trolls when I took down the Christmas decorations a few weeks ago. I put it on the “giveaway” table at work. And surprisingly, somebody took it. Oh well, better them than me.  

December 6 is always a tough day for me because my maternal grandmother died on that date in 1987. I’ve lost many people, but that date stings every year – no doubt because of the holidays that wrap around this month. Losing people is always tough, but losing them during the holiday seems to cut a bit deeper. It’s something you feel more. I usually don’t talk about it much and do my best to be a “big girl” and move on, as is expected.

Until this year. I know it’s been 24 years, but I’m all grown up (middle age now, in fact), I’ve found my voice, and now there’s this great thing called the Internet where I can post things. And now, you’re going to hear ALL about it. 
 
One of the reasons why dealing with death over the holidays is tough is, naturally, because the entire world is celebrating, and you just don’t feel it. A hole has been ripped in your life and, as I said in my last entry, a date in red on the calendar doesn’t hasten the healing of the heart. I believe it was C.S. Lewis that said death is unnatural because people weren’t created to die, and I believe it. Death is such an aberration to our spirit, and that abnormality is especially evident in a season where we celebrate the birth of our Savior and eternal life. Emotions know no season and if they take a smack then nothing is going to expedite the healing process. Here they parallel the body. Don’t believe me? Burn your hand, break a bone, or sprain something today and see if you’re healed by Christmas. 
 
The reason I sound cynical here is because of the other reasons why death is hard to deal with during the holidays. Yes, the whole world is celebrating, and they don’t want to stop –not for you, or for any pesky little problem like (gasp) death. They want to be happy and have fun and by God, you aren’t going to stop them. I thought perhaps it was my still child-like perspective on the world in 1987, but in the 24 years since then I still hold to the opinion that:

 1.       People don’t cope with death well, especially during the holidays;

2.       The dumbest things are said at visitations and funerals; and 

3.       People can be incredibly selfish, rude, and insensitive in their desire to create “the perfect holiday” (which we have already acknowledged won’t happen). 

I thought it was because people kept telling me to “cheer up” and “be glad the holidays are here to help ease the pain.” I thought it was because people kept telling me to “grow up” and“get over it because it was just a grandparent.” I thought it was because people kept saying “you mother has it worse - don’t you owe it to her to get over it and try to make Christmas good for her?” Yes, people really said these things, without exaggeration. But the problem is that I learned it wasn’t just me when Rick’s grandmother died on December 21, 2000. I warned Rick of the incredible stupidity and insensitivity he was about to experience and lo and behold if he didn’t see I was right within 10 minutes when a lady walked up to us with a huge smile plastered on her face and said “What a wonderful time to go to Heaven! She gets to celebrate Jesus’ birthday with him face to face. But oh, your poor father, this must be awful for him. So, what are you doing to celebrate?”

If looks could kill, the one Rick and I gave that lady would have made her the funeral home’s next customer. I noticed she hurried away and we’ve never seen her again.

I wish I could say I’m embellishing these comments, but I’m not. In fact, I’m fighting a rare urge to name names here so the whole world will know who the igits are. But I’m not going to do it because the point of this entry isn’t to debate right and wrong. It’s to acknowledge that people do die during this joyous time of year and to guide you toward the proper way to help somebody that’s suffering a loss during the holidays. And so, I have offered my experiences to give a few tips on how to best console people that are grieving over the holidays. 

I’ve already hit on the first one. Emotional healing knows no season, so please don’t try to push people into celebrating if they don’t feel like it. Not for their sake, or the sake of the kids, or the family, or anybody. My mother and Rick’s father tried to put on that “brave face for the family,” and let me tell you – it didn’t work. Grief was the pink elephant in the room and everybody saw it by Christmas. Not only are you headed for disaster by not allowing them time to grieve, but you risk more damage by your selfish demand that the holidays will go on, come hell or high water. So please, back off. If they don’t want to put up a tree this year, go caroling or attend parties, don’t make them. Back off and give them the space they need. If you feel you absolutely must do something, do it in more practical ways that are not holiday related, like offering to bring them a meal, help them clean the house, or take care of the kids one evening. Believe me, they will appreciate you not force feeding them to a world high on Christmas more than any present under the tree. 

Second, please use discernment. Everything that flies through your head doesn’t need to fly out of your mouth, and as the non-grieving party you have a higher obligation to put a lasso on your tongue. This is true always, but it’s absolutely essential at visitations and funerals. This is not the time to be witty, wise, or philosophical. There are people trained for that, so leave it to them: You know, the pastors, priests, rabbi’s, therapists, psychologists, and others trained in the religious or mental health fields. I have no doubt that losing a parent is much worse than losing a grandparent, but that’s an inappropriate thing to say to ANYBODY, especially to a 12 year old that’s confused, hurting, and doesn’t know what to do. Logic doesn’t work in highly emotional situations like this, so don’t go there. In fact, when it comes to funerals then the less you say, the better. Just say “I’m sorry for your loss” and let it go. People in these situations don’t want a dissertation on dealing with grief or a lecture on getting over it. They want people to acknowledge how they feel and have respect for it.

Third, don’t take it personally. People are already stressed out this time of year and that tends to work on nerves. Unfortunately, sorrow and anger are part of the grieving process which can strip nerves raw and increase emotional outbursts. I know it’s awkward if somebody burst into tears when a carol comes on in a store, or shouts insults at the mall Santa, but unfortunately seasonal things that seem benign to most can trigger deep grief responses in those dealing with loss. I know from experience that it can be extremely frustrating to watch the world celebrate when a huge hole has just been ripped in your life, and sometimes the strangest things knock holes in those walls of restraint. Don’t make a scene bigger. Simply try to diffuse the situation as smoothly as possible, remove the person from it, and do your best to control your emotions so you can help them control theirs. They’re weak right now, so give them the gift of being strong until they are healed and able to be strong on their own again. 

I have a word for those of you that have recently lost loved ones, or that have lost them this year and are facing your first holiday season without them. Please know that you aren’t alone. There’s nothing wrong with you, and you are going through a natural process. Understand that it will get easier, but it can only get easier if you take the time to go through the grieving process in your own timing. So don’t try to be brave or try to sweep it under the rug  because it’s the holidays. Some people don’t get it, but that’s not your problem. They will one day because we all lose loved ones and have to deal with that empty seat at the holiday table eventually. The holidays come around every year so believe me, there will be more chances to “do the holidays” later. It’s ok to take a year off if you just can’t face it this year. It doesn’t make you Scrooge. It makes you a human being – and there’s nothing wrong with that. 
 
Finally I’d like to say, for the record, that all the people that said those rude, insensitive things to me in 1987 and to Rick in 2000 deserve a smack. So I’m saying it now, on the INTERNET, to the WHOLE WORLD, on MY WEBSITE right now. Consider this your virtual kick.

Wow, I do believe that’s something like Nana would say.

Hi everybody, Sherri is taking it easy today, so I thought I'd drop by. My name is Kirsten Chalmers, from Blurry, and I'm here to set the record straight. I know there's a lot of talk about "things" between me and Danny. I think a lot of people misunderstand things - completely.

I'm not after Danny for a relationship or to "hook up." Please, just because I'm a cheerleader doesn't mean I'm shallow! Actually, I've been trying to establish a better peace between Danny and Rachel. This "truce" of theirs is barely a truce at all. In fact, it feels more like a silent war. Sure, they agreed not to talk - but do you realize what kind of situation that puts their mutual friends in? It forces us to take sides, and that's just not fair.

I tried to talk to Rachel about this all summer and got nowhere. Then she had her big 18th birthday party over Labor Day weekend. Yea, pretty much most of the senior and junior classes were invited - except Danny. That was SO majorly awkward, especially since those two were glued together all of last year! It was such a shock! When we asked and she said they came up with this "you leave me alone, I leave you alone" kind of "truce," most of us were floored. We just couldn't believe they would cut off each other that completely. Couldn't they at least act friendly? Rachel said no, that Danny shot that down and she was doing what he asked. She said she was willing to try to be friends, or at least civil, but he said no, he had his own friends and would keep to them.

So the day after the party, I saw Danny at the Pizza Parlor and decided to ask him about it myself. He said that yes, this not talking truce was his idea. He said he simply couldn't be friends with Rachel after their messy breakup. I didn't think it was that messy. It seemed like a clean break to me. They were together one day and apart the next - but whatever. He also said something about Rachel not being able to accept who he really was and his other friends, and he couldn't deal with her judging him all the time.

I get it - I really do. Rachel doesn't mean to be judgemental, but her life is black and white. She's such a good girl, and she's really smart - but she's in her own little perfect world sometimes and that can be a hard thing to break through. I know. I've been friends with her my whole life. She just can't handle the shades of grey. Heck, she can't even see them! But this whole thing between her and Danny is making things pretty tough for the rest of us, and that's not fair. It seems that they could budge, at least a little, for us. I spent all summer trying to get Rachel to do that. She claimed she tried and he wouldn't budge.Fine, so I decided to try working on him. I thought that maybe if I could get one of them to back down, then the other might be willing to establish more civil terms. Rachel seemed willing to budge if Danny would - so I'm trying to get him to do his part now.

So no, I'm not "after"  him. All I'm trying to do is make our senior year less awkward. Don't we deserve that? These are supposed to be the best days of our lives! I'm just trying help - really!

Marielle, my friend on the cheerleading squad, said to let them both go and do my own thing. She said there's no way this can get any better and in fact, it's probably going to come to the point of a break sometime soon. I know it seems it would be easier to let the whole thing go and do my own thing - but I've been friends with Rachel, Sasha, and the gang my whole life. I can't just walk away from them. I'm not going to abandon all of my friends just because one of them had a messy breakup. Heck, that could happen to any of us! I just have a bad feeling that Marielle has a point, and I'm so afraid it might come to that. I hope it doesn't. I'd hate that. I can't imagine life without Rachel, Sasha, and Natalie in it.

God, why does life have to be so complicated? Why did Danny have to get so entrenched in our lives, then screw things up with Rachel? Why couldn't Rachel give Danny more of a chance to change? Why, why, why?

I don't know, but I'm going to do whatever it takes to make things better - for myself and for all of us.

That's all for today. Take care.

Author's note: We see exactly where this went for Kirsten from the sample Prologue on the front page. What happened? Find out in Blurry!

Hi everybody, Sherri is taking it easy today, so I thought I'd drop by. My name is Kirsten Chalmers, from Blurry, and I'm here to set the record straight. I know there's a lot of talk about "things" between me and Danny. I think a lot of people misunderstand things - completely.

I'm not after Danny for a relationship or to "hook up." Please, just because I'm a cheerleader doesn't mean I'm shallow! Actually, I've been trying to establish a better peace between Danny and Rachel. This "truce" of theirs is barely a truce at all. In fact, it feels more like a silent war. Sure, they agreed not to talk - but do you realize what kind of situation that puts their mutual friends in? It forces us to take sides, and that's just not fair.

I tried to talk to Rachel about this all summer and got nowhere. Then she had her big 18th birthday party over Labor Day weekend. Yea, pretty much most of the senior and junior classes were invited - except Danny. That was SO majorly awkward, especially since those two were glued together all of last year! It was such a shock! When we asked and she said they came up with this "you leave me alone, I leave you alone" kind of "truce," most of us were floored. We just couldn't believe they would cut off each other that completely. Couldn't they at least act friendly? Rachel said no, that Danny shot that down and she was doing what he asked. She said she was willing to try to be friends, or at least civil, but he said no, he had his own friends and would keep to them.

So the day after the party, I saw Danny at the Pizza Parlor and decided to ask him about it myself. He said that yes, this not talking truce was his idea. He said he simply couldn't be friends with Rachel after their messy breakup. I didn't think it was that messy. It seemed like a clean break to me. They were together one day and apart the next - but whatever. He also said something about Rachel not being able to accept who he really was and his other friends, and he couldn't deal with her judging him all the time.

I get it - I really do. Rachel doesn't mean to be judgemental, but her life is black and white. She's such a good girl, and she's really smart - but she's in her own little perfect world sometimes and that can be a hard thing to break through. I know. I've been friends with her my whole life. She just can't handle the shades of grey. Heck, she can't even see them! But this whole thing between her and Danny is making things pretty tough for the rest of us, and that's not fair. It seems that they could budge, at least a little, for us. I spent all summer trying to get Rachel to do that. She claimed she tried and he wouldn't budge.Fine, so I decided to try working on him. I thought that maybe if I could get one of them to back down, then the other might be willing to establish more civil terms. Rachel seemed willing to budge if Danny would - so I'm trying to get him to do his part now.

So no, I'm not "after"  him. All I'm trying to do is make our senior year less awkward. Don't we deserve that? These are supposed to be the best days of our lives! I'm just trying help - really!

Marielle, my friend on the cheerleading squad, said to let them both go and do my own thing. She said there's no way this can get any better and in fact, it's probably going to come to the point of a break sometime soon. I know it seems it would be easier to let the whole thing go and do my own thing - but I've been friends with Rachel, Sasha, and the gang my whole life. I can't just walk away from them. I'm not going to abandon all of my friends just because one of them had a messy breakup. Heck, that could happen to any of us! I just have a bad feeling that Marielle has a point, and I'm so afraid it might come to that. I hope it doesn't. I'd hate that. I can't imagine life without Rachel, Sasha, and Natalie in it.

God, why does life have to be so complicated? Why did Danny have to get so entrenched in our lives, then screw things up with Rachel? Why couldn't Rachel give Danny more of a chance to change? Why, why, why?

I don't know, but I'm going to do whatever it takes to make things better - for myself and for all of us.

That's all for today. Take care.

Author's note: We see exactly where this went for Kirsten from the sample Prologue on the front page. What happened? Find out in Blurry!

Hi everybody, Sherri has decided to yield to the call of her recliner, so I'm stepping in to keep her blog from getting hopelessly outdated. My name is Sasha Miles, from Blurry. I'm Rachel Shull's best friend - in fact, I've got to type fast, cause we're fixing to head to the football game. Thank God the weather is cooling off. These band uniforms are brutally hot in August and September!

I've got bigger problems than hot band uniforms, though. The problem? Our friend Kirsten is after Rachel's ex. Oh, Rachel thinks that Kirsten has no romantic interest in Danny and that she's just trying to remain civil for the sake of civility since Danny is hanging around some of those atheletes because of their fast cars - yea right. I have to tell you, Rachel is sweet - and that's her problem. She thinks everybody else is too. She just can't fathom that her best friend might be after her ex. She suspects something's up that isn't above board, but she's just too good to realize it. She thinks that the "guy code" of staying away from your friend's ex's apply to girls too. Well, it doesn't. There's no such thing as a "girl code." The heart wants what the heart wants and will go after it - no matter how many knives you stick in how many backs.

That probably doesn't make a bit of sense, but this will - I saw Kirsten getting pretty cozy with Danny outside the Pizza Parlor after band practice yesterday. Thank God that the band director has an officer's meeting after practice yesterday in preparation for tomorrow's competition, or Rachel would have walked right in the middle of it with me(she's Band Captain). I can't tell you how much luck was at work last night.

Danny and Kirsten played cool, but she called me later and said that yes, she does want to see if this leads to more and wouldn't be disappointed if it did. I talked her into using more discresion while she and Danny "explore their feelings for one another" (oh PLEASE!) and that she would have to be the one to tell Rachel if they did start dating. And I'm going to have to do a hell of a job playing dumb, because I can't get caught in the middle of this. I just can't handle it. There's already been too much drama between Rachel and Danny since they broke up. Yes, they agreed to ignore one another from now on, but people keep talking to try to stir things up and it makes it tough. The whole gang feels like they're in the middle of a silent war. And now Kirsten decides to go off on her own and do the dumbest thing possible. I just don't get it.

Maybe this will fall apart and lead to nothing. Maybe Kirsten will see the same flaws that drove Rachel away from Danny and I'm worrying for nothing. God, I hope so! I mean, what's he thinking? How can this possibly lead to anything good?

That's the problem. I don't think she is thinking.

Well, it's time to head to the statium so I better head out. Thanks for listening to me vent. I hope this is nothing. Man, I hope it is.

Bye!

Author's note: Would Kirsten date Rachel's ex-boyfriend? Find out in Blurry!

Hi everybody, pleasure to meet you. No, this isn't Sherri. Sherri's been a bit under the weather this week. She's been trying to find ways to simplify her life SO we FINALLY got her to agree to turn her blog over to the good folks from her writing from time to time. So who am I? This is Rachel Shull in Woodland, SC. You might know me from Blurry. I'm an 18 year old senior at Woodland High School. 

Maybe you folks can help me. My friend, Kirsten, has been acting weird since last weekend. When I see her she's fine and acts normal, but I swear it seems like she's avoiding me. We usually talk on Tuesdays because my band practice and her cheerleading practice end at the same time on those days, but she rushed outwithout speaking to me or Sasha this week. Then today she didn't have lunch with us - she claimed she had to go to the library, but Josh ran into her coming out of his shop class and she gave him the brush off too. Then today she came up to me before band practice and asked me - get this - how I feel about Danny.

How do I feel about Danny? Um, hello? He's my ex-boyfriend. How do you think I feel? That's odd. I mean, we talked about that break up all summer. And it comes back up now, after all these months? What the ...?

Sasha and Josh think she wants to hook up with Danny but I don't think so. I mean, she knows why I left him and she was never that fond of him while we were dating last year. Surly, she saw my mistakes with him. You can't change guys mixed up in rough crowds like that. The "bad boy" boyfriend was fun for a while but - yea, we've had that conversation a million times, it's not fun forever. She gets it.

Still, I wonder what this is about? Maybe I'll get to talk to her after the football game tomorrow night. I'm sure it's probably nothing.

Well, I better shove off. I have trigonometry homework (why am I taking that? I want to be a writer and a teacher, not a design professional! Oh well, stupid requirements) and a chapter of Psychology to read that didn't get done in study hall today. I hope all is well in your world.

Bye!

What's going on with Rachel's best friend and her ex-boyfriend? Find out in Blurry, available at www.wingsepress.com !

I cant' believe tomorrow is Labor Day and the summer will be over. Well, summer isn't "officially" over for a few more weeks - maybe a month or more based solely on the weather - but Labor Day is the end of the summer season. Wow, where did it go?

If I had to sum up this summer, I'd call it a perfect reflection of real life. There have been highs - like publishing a book, and lows - like 2 friends dying of cancer. And everything in between. It hasn't been perfect, but I honestly can't call it bad either. And I feel I must add that there were so many great movies out this summer too - the DVD's coming out this fall are going to be awesome!

I know a lot of people say it's been a long, hot summer. I'll agree with hot, but long? No. It seems we were just having our spring free thrift day at the church - but that was in mid May. It doesn't seem like over 3 months ago but it was. Time flies. Granddaddy always warned me to not wish my life away, but I suppose it's equally futile to cling to the past. Best to live in the present.

Am I ready for fall? Doesn't seem to matter - it's coming at the speed of time and it is what it is. I suppose one thing I do need to accomplish this fall is finishing up Splinter. That's the novel I was working on before the contracts for Blurry and Anywhere But Here came along. I suppose I better get that wrapped up before Anywhere But Here goes into pre-production in early 2012 if I want to submit it for publication next spring.

Well, that's my musing for the day. Enjoy your Labor Day. It's supposed to be a rainy one here, but that's ok. The summer came in with some vicious storms (and power outages at interesting times and under interesting circumstances too). I suppose it's natural it should go out that way.

Goodbye, Summer 2011! It's been real.

I hate that song "When Peace Flows Like a River." It's a filthy lie.

I suppose that statement deserves an explanation, so here it is: I went to a funeral for a friend yesterday that died from cancer. It's the third friend I've lost to cancer in 18 months. To say I hope I never see the face of this ugly beast again would be an understatement.

Anyway, they seem to love this hymn at funerals. There's just one problem: No, it's not well with my soul. I don't understand why three people I know had to suffer like this. They were good people. They wanted to live. It seems so unfair that their lives were cut short when I look around and see people that don't appreciate a thing - or that play hard and fast, like they don't care about putting themselves or others in danger - and they keep going on and on. 

I hate that hymn because it's arrogant and it's a lie. Are you ok with anything that happens? Life can whollop you and it's just "well, praise God and glory be." No folks, not in the real world. Real people get frustrated. Real people get angry. Real people are confused and hurt and don't understand. I'll admit that I'm a real person and my soul's got problems. I don't get it. In fact, there's a lot I don't get.

Another reason I don't like this song is because it implies that faith means never questioning anything - just blind acceptance. You can reason out everything, even if the reason is simply "it's God's will." While that is true, and I suppose it all does boil down to that, it's been my experience that human beings aren't that simplistic. We do try to understand. We do ask questions. We do get frustrated and angry in our confusion and lack of understanding. It is through these struggles that we find what faith really is: Not a lack of questions, but an acceptance that we won't have most of the answers. That in the grand scheme of things it does make sense, and being ok with the fact that only God may know how it fits into that scheme. And most importantly, to realize that it's ok to not have the answers or to work through whatever processes we need to work through to get to this acceptance.

That's where I'm at. My soul does hurt, and it's confused. I know all three of them are at peace now, and that there's a greater plan that I won't see this side of Heaven. Intellecutally, it's there. Emotionally, I'm still on the journey to that point. I miss them and those absences do hurt. It's hard to remember that they won't walk through that door at church Sunday morning any more, that they won't be at that committee function or in Sunday School or passing by at functions with their cheerful smiles. The reality that they're gone and never coming back is still stinging. And I don't think there's a thing wrong with that sting. It means I feel. It means I'm still human. It means I'm still alive.

So no, it's not well with my soul, and I'm ok with admitting that. My soul is hurt and it needs to heal. I know the truth and accept it, but I'm just going to have to work through that process to get these pesky emotions at that same level. And I don't think I'm alone. Many others are on that same journey. I have plenty of company on this road. My comfort is that tomorrow is a new day. New mercies every morning. Great is thy faithfulness.

Now that's one I can live with.

That's all today. Happy Friday to you tomorrow.

Bye!