Have you ever had one of those days when you're trying so hard to keep it together, but everything seems to keep chipping away at you? Today's been that day for me. Woke up early this morning to find Rick desperately ill. Long story short, we were at doctor's offices from 8:00 a.m. until 12:30 p.m. having tests run to find he has diverticulitis. They put him on medication, but he feels terrible and is very weak. If it's anything like that stomach infection I had 5 years ago, I completely understand. That was the most pain I'd ever been in, and it seemed to go on forever. It was really 2 months, but that's a long convalence. And believe me, to this day I thank God for every meal I eat pain free, without getting sick immediately after. My gratitude over the ability to eat without hurting will never end.

I got back from the doctor to find a letter from the lady that's been doing my hair since I was 16 saying she's retiring at the end of March. I suspected this was coming, but I didn't feel it would be right to leave someone that's done my hair for half my life over a gut feeling that she was going to be gone one day. So I decided that I'd deal with it when the time came. Well, it's here. I was thinking about growing my hair out a little anyway, and I think this is a sign that it's time to do it. We have a Cost Cutters nearby that I can go to once I'm ready to say it's long enough and start maintaining it again.

So my nerves were frayed when I went out a little while ago to get Rick's medication and the food the doctor recommended for him over the weekend. The pharmacy was very nice and understanding, but the grocery store was another issue. A woman accosted me to take a free newspaper the  minute I walked in the door. I mean, she latched on and wouldn't shut up! I finally told her I had no need for a paper and walked off. It was really hard to tell her it's only good for bird poop around my house and I'd be glad to demonstrate by shoving that paper she kept waving in my face someplace to demonstrate how newspapers are used in my home. But I remembered that you really need to be nice, and times when you're frayed are especially important. Annoying as she was, it wouldn't have been right to take my hell of a day out on her. But gosh, she sure made herself a prime target!

Ironically, I had hoped to potentially dig for some short story ideas today but that's not gonna happen. I did a few promotional things, though. For example, I need to verify this blog with Technorati, and to do that I need to put a validation code in this post. So here it is for them: MRV3RHK2K9GC . Here's hoping this works and helps!

Well, I finished another blog series. I've been thinking about what to do next here. I don't want to do another series; not now anyway. I think I'd like to keep it free and kind of random for now. That's ok. Flexibility is good, and I think readers want to be surprised by what they'll find every now and then.

That's all for today. Here's hoping things improve. Take care and I'll see you later.

Bye!

Welcome to my latest "mini blog series" on surviving the holidays! In these weeks leading up to the holidays I'm going to offer my experiences, insights, and observations on getting through the holidays without losing your sanity. I'd like to open this series with a list of do's and don'ts - basically, simple tips that will help you get through this season with less stress and more time and resources to enjoy what the holidays are all about.

DO keep a schedule with you at all times, as this is a season filled with cordial invitations to events of all sorts - and those invitations can come at any place, at any time. It's never safe to be without a calendar this time of year. If you don't have a mobile device, get a small calendar that you can carry in a purse, briefcase, or pocket.

DON'T be afraid to decline an invitation. It simply isn't possible to do everything - there's too much going on. There is a polite way to decline an invitation. Simply say "I appreciate you thinking of me and offering this invitation, but I'm afraid I'm not going to be able to attend." You don't owe anybody a doctoral dissertation on your calendar. It's perfectly ok to say "no" just because you need time to do other things, or for yourself.

DO go ahead and make travel plans and arrangements now. Waiting until the last minute is stressful to you and rude to the hosts. It takes a lot of "doing" to hosts guests in your home, so be considerate and let them know arrival and departure dates and relative times now so they can plan for your visit accordingly.

DO make shopping lists. In this season of buy, buy, buy, it's easy to lose track of how much you've bought. Do like Santa - make a list and check it twice.

DO check your resources to avoid needless spending or duplicating resources. I was fixing to buy more wrapping paper this past weekend - until I checked my supplies and discovered 10 rolls of paper from last year. People won't remember what wrapping paper, gift tags, bows, boxes or gift bags you used last year and truth  be told, you probably didn't remember until you pulled it out of storage.

DON'T be afraid to ask someone on your gift list what they want if you're completely stumped on what to give them. We usually buy gifts for the same people year after year, so after a while it's hard to be original. Don't try. Just ask.

DO ask the people on your gift list if they're ok with receiving gift cards for presents. People seem to have strong opinions on this. I love them, as do most of my family members, but I've had some friends that believe giving gift cards is wildly offensive and insensitive. I actually plan to do an entry just on this topic soon.

DO regift if you got something in the past that hasn't been opened or used, but be careful and DON'T regift it to the person that gave it to you. In fact, if you get something that winds out in the "strorage" drawer or closet, it would be wise to put a note on it indicating who gave it to you to prevent such an embarassing error.

DO observe important traditions, but DON'T feel obligated to hand on to ones that don't mean much to you - or others. Things tend to pass in time. People get married, people have babies, people die. Some things stay and some things go, and that's ok. Keep what means the most and let go of what doesn't.

DO take care of yourself and mind your health - mentally and physically. Be sure to take time out for yourself, excercise, eat right, and get enough sleep. It's easy to skimp on self care during this busy season.

DON'T go off your medications now. I'm not being a smart alec. Money is typically tight this time of year, and often people decide to skip the medication refills to save a few bucks. Don't do it. Your doctor put you on your medication for a reason, and you feel better because of it. If you go off now, you will suffer. This is no area to skimp on ever. It's for your better health. You have enough on you without having to battle your body as well - and you will if you go off your medication. So don't do it. And if, by chance, you do feel it's ok to do so, I urge you to do two things: Do it under doctor's supervision, and strongly consider waiting until January and making this a New Year's Resolution instead.

DO realize that there's no such thing as a perfect holiday. As much as we'd all like our holiday to look like a Norman Rockwell painting, realize that's art, not reality. We live in an imperfect world and it shows that every day, in every way. It's extremely rare for things to go as we planned, and they never go perfectly, People get sick, cars break down, things get sold out, casseroles burn, wrapping paper tears, turkeys don't cook right, gift bags bust, the milk goes sour, people fight, shipments get delayed, bad weather hits, somebody moves and the Christmas card is returned on December 26 leading to misunderstanding and hurt feelings - the list can go on and on.

So there you have it - a few simple, common sense list of suggestions to get through the holidays. I believe that's a good place to end this entry, as well as a perfect lead in for the next entry in this series.

Next Time: Can't We All Just Get Along - It's The Holidays! (or, Reality 101)

I was talking to a friend a while back who sheepishly admitted that their doctor put them on an antidepressant. This friend was very unhappy to be on medication and said they wanted off the pills ASAP.

I countered by asking this friend if they thought it was bad for me to take antihistimines everyday to manage my allergy and sinus problems.

"No, why would that be a problem?" they asked. "After all, you have to take it to be able to function every day.It's a maintenance medication"

"Well, how is that different from you taking an antidepressant?" I asked. "If it helps you feel more energetic and you're able to go about your daily tasks easier, what's the difference?"

They never thought of it that way. And in my experience, it seems most people don't.

I don't understand why we're so hesitant to take care of our mind. We don't mind popping an aspirin for a headache, or taking antacids for heartburn. We'll mention an ache or pain to a doctor in a minute. But if it's our emotions that hurt, well, that's different. That's personal. That's nobody's business.

Well, my allergies aren't anybody's business, but I'm not ashamed of them. I don't advertise this health issue, but I don't hide it either. And while I understand that an anxiety attack and sniffling and sneezing are perceived differently by the general public, well, relief is available. Shouldn't we take advantage of it?

I think that as a whole, society has come a long way in understanding mental illness, but they still have a long way to go. One thing we can do to progress this effort is to be honest with ourselves. If you've lacked motivation for six months or more and getting out of bed every day is a challenge, treat it like the flu and see your doctor. Relief is available.

There may not be a cure for many of the emotional disorders that plague us, but they can be managed. And with the right treatment, you can have a good and productive life, just like you deserve.

You don't life in bondage to your physical ailments - you manage them. don't live in bondage to your emotions or your mind either. Don't be shy. Don't be embarassed. Don't let it define you. Manage it, so you define yourself in spite of it.